Two thirds of adults in England are obese or overweight. It would make as much sense to ask what is different about the other one third.

Our local Tesco is terrible for crap food. I'd say 50% of shop floor space is dedicated to chocolate, crisps, biscuits and ready meals. Absolutely horrendous. No wonder so many people in my town are overweight or obese.

Full honesty: I do very little exercise. I walk quite a lot though, for ex will walk the 20min to school and 20min back instead of driving. Or when meeting with a friend we will walk 10k at a good speed (ie sweaty afterwards) instead of sitting down for a coffee.
Most of the difference is what you eat and how much. At least it is how my body works!
BMI 19.

All I can say is that I was underweight all my life until I hit perimenopause and then I rapidly gained within two years. Now I'm overweight but not massively so.

I eat the same amount as I've always done.

Genetics and hormones.

Nothing mumsnet loves more than a fat-bashing thread

I used to be about 5-10lbs overweight. I got the flu a few years ago and barely ate for a month. Obviously I lost quite a lot of weight during that time, but I also seemed to reset my tastebuds. Now everything sugary and fatty tastes nasty, it's honestly like bathroom chemicals! I used to love chocolate, cakes and sweets, always wanting more even when I was stuffed.

Also big portions are so normal in cheaper eating places. Even Wasabi just popped into at lunch time thinking I might get some "healthier" hot food.

There are so many places that may appear healthy but are not, I'm by no means singling out Wasabi for criticism. The meals had the calories on and most things were about 1200 calories. I'd only eat that much in one meal maybe for my takeaway on a Friday night or when we eat out. My calories per day is about 1677 to lose 1lb a week, I can't afford to eat 1200 for an average weekday lunch- not even looking at the macros but I think it would be quite high in carbs.

I went to a small chain fried chicken and burger type place the other day (DD2's choice- not KFC actually which I do like every now and then) - I thought it's good at least to give myself a diet challenge sometimes. I got like four chicken tenders which was ok on calories and protein, and quite filling, but the only side available was chips - no salad anything green remotely available - I mean even in McDonalds you can get a salad! So I didn't get anything. But in so many places like this you struggle to get so much as a vegetable- you can't have a balanced meal out.

@DustyLee123 I know plenty of underweight & normal weight people who do very little exercise at all. It’s the overweight who religiously get the steps in in my circle.

So it’s stopped while they’re taking the hormones and chemicals…

They weren't shipped off to Weight Watchers as a teen by their mothers?

I did almost none till I crossed 45 and was a size 6 to 8. Then peri kicked in.

Because I want to be slim more than I want to eat something nice this is the big taboo that a lot of overweight people refuse to acknowledge!

For me it translates as:

• Never buying from the food vans when visiting an event (Christmas lights trail, fun fair, ice cream vans etc). The food is very tempting but often a disappointment anyway -> not worth the calories.
• Learning how to cook fakeways (Gousto was a great help): same taste but less calories and less UPF.
• Desert not at every meal.
• Not a lot of alcohol (not worth the calories for me)
• No snacks.

I have always found my weight to be exactly what I'd expect it to be based on the calories I consume versus the energy I expend. I am the poster woman for CICO and eat less move more. I'm 55. My BMI is 21. It's not genetic (my mum was morbidly obese) its not age related (im at the weight gaining age) its nothing to do with avoiding carbs (i dont) or how much water i drink or my 'eating window'. Its because I only eat the (small) amount of calories a woman my age, height and lifestyle needs, which is around 1600, a few more if I do a brisk 30 minute walk a day. I'm not saying it's that straightforward for everyone, but I can only speak from my experience.

I’m overweight but I do at least 3 hours exercise a week. I wonder how much exercise all non-overweight people do.

I’m slim and always have been. I need quite a lot of calories per day for my size and needs watch out that I eat enough in stressful times because if I miss a few meals, or just eat something small, the weight will drop off me.

Why am I slim? I think partly it’s genetic/build. I’m quite muscly and don’t have much fat so I burn more calories. I’m also active. Not ‘going to the gym’ active, but constantly on the go. I also walk a lot.

I limit the amount of crap I buy because it’s addictive and if I had cupboards full of large bags of crisps, biscuits, chocolate, I’d eat it. I just don’t buy it or limit my purchases. I rarely have takeaways and dislike popular ones like pizza and burgers (I go for Indian, Chinese, Thai, etc) so I reckon they have less fat.

I think another part of the issue is the balance of foods on the plate. I love veg and always have plenty of veg with a meal - around half the plate. My (very) obese friend rarely has veg and doesn’t seem to think of it. A small thing but I think it makes a difference.

Losing weight is a lot harder than putting it on! Also, obese people usually have a fair bit of insulin resistance that hinders weight loss. I don’t think it’s easy.

In brief, limit takeaways and crappy snacks by not buying them; eat lots of green veg; don’t drink your calories(ie fizzy drinks, juice, beer, etc); keep active - walk, go up and down the stairs, keep busy. Be aware of what you’re eating too. If you eat watching the TV, it’s so easy to mechanically shovel in food and nibbles in a mindless way.

Look at the portion sizes on things like cereal and pasta. Weigh them out and see their size, then stick to that portion size. People’s judgement has gone out the window.

Same here!

An environment of high-calorie, constantly-available, very attractive food isn't "natural" for humans, and it's not good for us. The ultra-processed stuff is an interesting take - like the evidence of companies doing research in the 1970s and 80s on which combinations of fat and sugar lit up pleasure sensors most in brain scans. A lot of modern food is designed to make us over-eat, that's the point of it.

I have to remind myself not to eat crap, not to eat much of non-crap, and to keep moving. If I don't, my default is that I like eating too much and don't move enough. For me it does take self-discipline. There's been a big culture change that we've not noticed, if you read fiction written in the 1950s, for example, it's clear from everyday references that normal conversation involved women (in particular) saying they weren't eating X. There's a reference I remember from Secret Water, written in the 1930s, where one of the children refers to "the cream buns, you know, the ones adults won't eat because of their figures". There was less "high reward" food available, but also people were aware of a need to restrict it.

There are people who do have a different feedback mechanism, I think - DS1 and DH are both like this. They both struggle to put on weight - DH lost quite a lot on a long trip to India, and it took him 3 years to regain it. Both of them vary how much they eat far more than most people, depending on exercise, etc. Both are capable of eating a dinner normally intended for 3 adults, both sometimes eat very little. They seem to have bodies which are more self-regulating.

I have two kids, both raised the same. Both weaned onto food cooked from scratch, not given sugar for as long as possible. We tend to eat relatively healthily as a family, eat home-cooked meals together etc. I'm a healthy weight and exercise a lot. One of my kids is overweight, the other isn't. Not really sure what can be learned from that!

Broadly speaking the people I know who are still slim in their 40's are naturally slim. They have never been overweight so therefore have never dieted. Most of them don't do much if any exercise. I think they do eat less, but they don't feel hardship like someone dieting feels it, in a calorie restriction kind of sense. They eat to satiety and that's enough, they stop when full because why wouldn't you? I think they have a completely different relationship with food than a chronic dieter like me.

I'm a size 10-12 but it's been a lifetime of calorie restriction, up and down weight. And exercise. And that's all to break even, and I'm still overweight according to my bmi

I think it's incredibly reductive to look at 2/3 of the population and say 'they've all got psychological problems with food'.

It's the food industry and;

• I think UPF's drive cravings that whole/natural foods don't
• everyone is running on sugar and carbs which makes you want to eat more sugar and carbs
• the glucose rollar coaster many people are on
• the normalisation of ever increasing portion sizes
• the cheapness of UPF food
• the extra hours working and demands placed on most of us means we're rushing back from work to get something 'stuck on for dinner' that will be as quick and easy as possible - rather than one person being stay at home making food from scratch
• the lack of a 'village' - quite literally. Alot of people don't live walking distance to a butcher/green grocer - so we're all getting in our cars to hit Sainsbury's/Tesco
• people are just fucking tired these days - driving poor food choices even further
• a whole billion pound diet industry giving mixed messages about what we should be doing/eating. It's all conflicting info.
• the retail sector increasing the size of clothes so we still feel we're an acceptable size (e.g current size 12 - would probably have been a size 16 - 20-30yrs ago)
• the downward fall of fat shaming - which is good but now most people are overweight we don't feel the pressure to lose weight because we feel normal compared to most people we see around and it's unlikely your manager at work/your bestmate is ever going to say - bloody hell you packed on a few pounds recently haven't you?
• the fitness industry becoming so over the top it's off putting

But if i had to boil it down to a couple of things - the crap in our food is leading us to feel hungrier more often, this along with large portions and large sized clothing being normalised is what's causing obesity.

So why do I think slim people are slim? If we put to one side the people who work really hard to stay in shape - those who are extra careful about what they eat and always exercise, then I think the slim people who don't seem to gain weight but who are not people obsessed about 'being slim' - probably did luck out genetically and probably don't eat ready meals.

But I also want to flag the point that most people who think they are slim are probably not as slim as they think. They fit into size 10 M&S jeans and feel great about it. Failing to recognise that those size 10 jeans were likely a size 14-16 back in the 70s. If you roll back to that time, they themselves may have been considered 'a larger lady'.

It's a false sense of accomplishment to bask in slim smugness when the population around you is growing larger and larger.

We have family in the USA who think DH and I are 'slim' and by their measure we are. In the UK - we're firmly 'overweight'. I'm a size 16 UK sizing (now) in the USA that's a size 12. My DH wears XL tops in the USA he was a medium. If we moved to the USA we could feel smug about how 'slim we are' and what good control we have over our eating.

Essentially everyone's perception of slim is now skewed.

I wonder how many self proclaimed slim people on this thread might get a shock if they spent some time in Japan.....

The slim people in the UK are not exempt from the issue - they are getting larger along with everyone else they are just slim in comparison. If you have a BMI of 23 and you delight in your own slimness just remember you'd be considered average (not slim) in Japan and might be told to exercise a bit more or have someone wide eyed looking at the size of your portion when eating lunch.

So to boil it down to psychological problems /no will power/ they don't eat right is to spectacularly fail to understand your own place in this quite literally growing problem.....which starts with the food industry, and is aided by the deprioritisation of family meal time, long working hours, dual parental incomes required to live etc etc etc.

Willpower/diet motivation is a small part of a much more complex issue. If 2/3 of the population were unemployed no one would say 'they all don't have the motivation to find work'. You'd say the system is broken.

Our food industry is broken but only for the people. For those running it - it's hugely profitable and as a result we'll continue to get fatter (including the slim people).....until something snaps.

Yes but why? Why are the more inured against the evolutionary impulse and the psychological manipulation that impels others (2/3 of others if the stats are to be believed) to overeat?

It's all well and good being glib but this a very important question. Western society (and all societies ultimately as our food culture globalises) is increasingly unhealthy and overweight and unhappy. People have been talking about 'eat less, move more' and willpower for decades, and it has not solved or even slowed down this growing problem.

I remember hearing a similar statement during a online talk into research on obesity (can't remember who was giving it). Basically the presenter said that he'd been researching why people were getting fatter, and after looking into the various changes in food environment/portion sizes/UPF/change to activity levels etc.. on a country/worldwide scale he realised that the initial question was wrong/of no interest. Of course people were getting fatter - it is the obvious outcome to the changes in environment. What was interesting was that not 'everyone' was getting fatter - or at least not to the same extent, so 'only 2/3 overweight/obese' rather than 90%+.

And while yes you can look at what is different about those people who aren't gaining weight (DNA/upbringing/illness/wealth etc..) what it really meant is that you need to stop blaming people for being fatter than previous generations and saying its a lack of willpower etc.. and accept that the problem is not the people but the environment and look at tackling that.

Interestingly it was through having pets that I realised my parents slightly overfeed everything, including me, with love, though I was never hugely overweight as a child I was a bit more solid than I needed to be. They had a tubby dog and a tubby tabby cat (who lost weight gradually when he came to live with us).

We had a lot of convenience food, probably decent portions, always snacks were available and, sugary fizzy drinks and cordials. I didn't drink tap water on its own until after I left home in my 20s. That said it's a credit to my parents that I did not grow up with hang ups about food or my body which would have been much worse. And my dad was very into exercise and that stayed with me. The worst thing probably was the "always clear your plate" - however much was on it - mentality which probably came from their growing up with not much food , still in rationing after the war years when they were born. Took me a while - and modern portion sizes when eating out - to see that might not be such a good idea. To this day I struggle with portions and my appetite is an unreliable narrator about portion sizes. Neither had sweets much as a child and had such a sweet tooth all their lives after.

Have to say though I seem to have done a bit better with DDs who have always been lighter than I was at their age and they are good eaters while being health conscious and take regular exercise.

sorry replied to wrong post

Health and physical activity.

I was slim most my life. Had an active job and reasonable health. Recently had poor health and can't get drs to help they just keep referring me to other departments and I'm getting worse, makes exercise difficult. Now not working as have a disabled child the LA will not give a school place so less active.

I have PCOS. to maintain a healthy weight I have to keep active and eat very few calories eg 1200 max. I'm too depressed and unhappy to skip meals with my life how it is now.

In my personal case, it's due to upbringing. Our DF was farmer and ex-army, in additon to phsyical work, he did a lot of running, played football. Sport/exercise was a big thing for me in school, and it still is for me today.

Also, I don't drink alcohol (never have really). But I'm also somewhat careful on food I eat. I love ice cream and chocolate, but (almost) never eat it.

There is so much calorie rich food around these days. Thinking back, I was positively hungry a lot of times (boarding) school!!