Deep down you know that you have to leave him. I get that it’s hard to do it when you’re actually in the middle of the situation. It’s brave to post on here, and I think you were looking for someone to give you a kick up the bum to actually get rid of him, and it looks like a lot of people have.
The thing you need to realise is that the man you are in love with literally does not exist, he is a fictional character. The man you are actually involved with is a nasty selfish lying cheat. He doesn’t love you. He doesn’t like you. He doesn’t care about you in any way at all. He doesn’t view you as a person, you’re just a pawn in his game.
I honestly think your best course of action is to completely cut him off. Block his number, no communication whatsoever. Call the police if he comes round. Ideally you’d move house, but I appreciate that is not straightforward. If you let him speak to you there’s a risk you’ll fall for his lies again. He’s obviously an incredible actor.
I know you have the strength to walk away because you’ve already proven that you have the strength to endure all this abuse and keep on trying to make things work. You just need to redirect all your energy onto yourself instead of him.
Imagine how your life could be a year from now. Imagine you’ve been a year free of him, and you’re moving forward with your life with confidence. Because if you don’t leave him, I absolutely guarantee you that a year from now you will be every bit as miserable as you are now, if not more so.
This man is never going to give you want you want, he’ll just keep stringing you along for his own enjoyment for as long as you let him. Please don’t let him do this to you any more.
And please get some counselling to try to address the issues that have left you with so little confidence and self respect. You deserve so much more than you are settling for.