To be astounded at this behaviour from an 18 year old.

Unfortunately this type of little shit male is a mysogynistic bully and almost certainly wouldn't have done the same if her parent was male, or if she had big burly brothers.
Sad but true.

People are often saying "just log it with the police" thinking it's just a way to start an audit trail and no more. This is not the case.

I am absolutely NOT being a pedant.
During my abusive marriage I was advised by MN to 'log it with the police'.

So I called them - just to tell them about something that had happened, in case things escalated. Next thing I know they're at the door because they have to investigate every suspected DV situation. I was terrified and it put me in a scary position.

They did say they were hot on it because the county I live in had such a poor record of DV support, but I still think people believe they can just call the police to let them know about things.

So there is no need to be mean and swear.

I agree.
Unfortunately and worryingly there is a tranch of young men and teenage boys who feel entitled to say and do whatever they like if they feel they’ve been embarrassed, disrespected or disempowered, and behind social media they think there’s no consequences. There’s some horrific ‘role models’ they look to that tell them this.
I too would report his behaviour.

Yep - über-pedantic. It is a turn of phrase. People need to get over themselves

It's so inappropriate right now to be such a pedant.

"log it with the police", is the same thing as "report it to the police" FFS.

Of course. There is a misconception that people can just call the Police and ask them to note something that's happened. They are then surprised (and often worried) when the police take it out of their hands and make a house call or whatever.

Report to the police.

Indeed. But in the event that this does escalate there will then be an audit trail.

This situation already meets the criteria for harassment - particularly given he has been asked to stop - and this alone merits a police report under their website guidelines. There is also a national stalking helpline available, and a good many recommendations are available online as to what action victims might take.

No. 1 is give them nothing. These men want a response - any response. If you ignore their calls or messages 100X, then pick up/reply on the 101st attempt, you've just taught them that this level of persistence is what it takes to get a reaction from you.

Document everything. Screenshot, Ring doorbell footage, voice notes, and make a note of dates and times. Store in a secure cloud.

I sincerely hope, OP, that things don't escalate to this level, but this man is showing a lot of warning signs and it's as well to be armed with the correct information, just in case.

Please tell the police. Hopefully that will help any unfortunate girls this male dates in the future.
A boyfriend my sister dumped at that age became unhinged and stalked our family. The police had to speak to his dad (which sorted it). And then you think of the likes of Kyle Clifford...
The audacity and disrespect of the little shit messaging you speaks volumes. He needs a lesson.

Agreed, and I've been thinking so for about the last ten years.

All very worrying indeed.

Call the police. Men like this need to have these things on record. I hope you can get your daughter some counselling to help her process this. The priority needs to be her forming healthy relationships in the future.

There is no "logging with police".
You report a crime to them and they act (or not) upon it.
The police do the logging not the caller.

He sounds absolutely unhinged as well as nasty and very malicious

I would unblock him so you know if what his state of mind is if he keeps sending messages. Hopefully he will burn out in a couple of days but I would talk to the neighbourhood PCSO if you have one and ask for their advice.

The regular police might not go to talk to him but the PCSO might.

It depends on your area too. My neighbour was being harassed by someone living nearby. He would encourage his dogs to pee on his front garden, chase his cats, and would yell obscenities at their house at 5.00 a.m. Our local police did go around and talk to him and told him to stop it. We are in a high petty crime area so the police are busy here but they still went over there. The good news is that he met my neighbour in the local supermarket a couple of months later, apologized, and they shook hands on it.

We had boyfriends' home phone numbers in the past. If I was dumped I certainly didn't phone the boy's parents to have a go at them.

I have some experience with this type of behaviour.

A family member of my husband does something like this every time she leaves a relationship. Calls their Mum. Shares intimate pictures. Calls the police and fabricates a story, or reports criminal behaviour that she participated in at the time, claiming she was forced into it by them. Tells everyone she knows that she's a victim of their abuse. Does everything she can to drag family and friends into her dramas and expects them to rescue her from the chaos she's caused herself. The result is she has barely anyone left, every friend she ever had has cut her off for their own sanity.

This boyfriend will go on to attract other people who enjoy this level of drama and will continue to leave scars in the lives of everyone who has the misfortune to be close to him when he explodes.

Be glad you and your daughter are out of it, delete him on all platforms and feel sorry for his family.

IMO his behaviour is concerning, especially for someone so young. I would personally find some resources online, contact the police if you feel it necessary and have a conversation with your daughter (if you haven’t already).

Not to fear monger but it’s important to remember that 1 woman/girl is killed every 4 days in the UK by a current/former partner.

From one of the below links “The mother of a teenager killed by her ex-boyfriend fears others are likely to die if more is not done to tackle abuse and violence in young people's relationships. Holly Newton's mother Micala Trussler voiced her concerns in response to a new survey suggesting 49% of teenagers in a relationship in the last year have experienced violent or controlling behaviour from their partner.”

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cly610zyly1o.amp

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-wiltshire-63823585.amp

Please don't threaten the police. You must absolutely report this to the police. He is unhinged and at such a young age, he will escalate into a very dangerous man in the not too distant future.

Take all evidence to the police, this will then help other women in the future if they do Clare's Law disclosures.

I wouldn't feel as reassured as you are that you're both safe. He could easily get back from his trip early. He has serious stalker/harassment vibes going on here and women are in the most danger when the relationship ends.

Hope this helps - I logged a threat once with the police. It was straight forward and easy to do. They didn’t do anything with it on that day. BUT when I had to call 999 as he was banging on my door and trying to get in via the back gate the record meant I got a police car in less than 4 minutes. Please do take it seriously

“Someone” got into his FB account and posted over 20 items for sale on marketplace, all photos lifted from other places, all at the same price - eg £52 for a ski erg, £52 for a dog crate, £52 for the latest iPhone etc.
Obviously not a proper hacker, who would have simply locked him out of his account, but someone who wanted to cause nuisance by him being inundated with messages from buyers.

Screenshot everything and tell her she must not go anywhere to meet him. He sounds a few sandwiches short of a picnic.

I'm not sure I agree this is the cause. You don't hear about women / girls behaving in this way do you? Just men and boys.

I’m so glad you’re supporting your DD so well OP. What a good mum you are! When I went through this my mum felt sorry for my stalker and would chat to him when he would bang on our door, rather than telling him to piss off or calling the police’s 20+ years later and I’m still angry with her about it.

I voted YABU, not because his behaviour is acceptable but because you are "astounded" by it. It's really not uncommon for jilted partners to lose their senses for a while. It's the "five stages of grief" thing, and one of them is ANGER. Yes he shouldn't have done it and yes you should speak to the police, but sadly this sort of behaviour is pretty tame in comparison to what happens when other couples break up.

A bit of practical advice: change your locks. Even if you don't think he has a key, don't take the chance.