Bit of a backstory, I have 2 children DS (8) and DD (6). Have been separated for 4 years from their dad and have been with my partner for 2 and a half years.
my children’s father has been flakey, sporadic and unpleasant the entire time and has a line of girlfriends (not my business) he introduced one to my children and they were together for about a year (ended with her reporting him to SS after a fight and the police having to remove them from eachother)
he had a stint of about 5 months of not seeing the kids at all when child support finally started catching up (after £2,000 arrears) and he claimed he had a mental breakdown and messaged me apologising and asking to see the children. I agreed but put boundaries in place. He has a new partner who he says that has been supporting him and they had been together for around 6 months so I told him he could start having the children overnight once a fortnight, but for all communication I basically put him in a groupchat with my partner, his partner and his mum because he has a history of being verbally abusive and just straight up lying all the time about arrangements and interactions.
somce then it has been fine, he’s already moved his new girlfriend in and she seems like a nice enough person. Obviously the kids have had to meet her (not ideal) but recently when making plans, he will not communicate at all. She will only send any kind of messages or arrangements and it is super passive aggressive and sickly sweet. The idea was that we communicated but it was a public ish platform so it couldn’t get nasty but it is enraging me to my core. And I found out that they’ve been together for 3 months, and she basically moved in instantly and sending me messages about looking after my children etc. I don’t know how to rectify this without looking like I’m being petty as he’s such a manipulative person any time I say anything at all he manipulates it.