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AIBU?

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Original poster

To expect my son to wash his hands when he gets in?

294 replies

Whyareyousoannoying · 28/01/2025 17:45

Ds 16yo has been at work or college, come home on public transport.

Aibu to expect him to wash his hands upon arriving home before he starts touching everything especially the fridge, food, cups etc. he will walk straight in and start going in the fridge making a drink not washing his hands.

When I ask him he shouts at me and calls me a germ phobe.

Everyone else in the house manages to wash their hands when they get in.

OP posts:
AllyDally · 29/01/2025 07:54

I don't understand why you have posted, majority saying YABU/don't do it but you are insistent you are correct anyway so surely pointless posting.

You can't force him to do it and there is not a specific reason he should, I wouldn't say it is the norm, esp as in covid times in was a specific thing that we were told to do at first, so clearly wasn't the norm. However he shouldn't shout at you over it.

ThePoshUns · 29/01/2025 07:46

ManchesterLu · 28/01/2025 22:13

If we continue to do so much hand washing, none of us will have any immunity to anything. I feel that this has become apparent this winter, as we've all pretty much forgotten about covid, and low and behold, everyone's had all the different viral illnesses multiple times.

Don't be ridiculous

Original poster
Whyareyousoannoying · 29/01/2025 07:37

Your toilet is cleaner than surfaces that hundreds of members of the public are touching. Who have likely been coughing, sneezing, nose picking, not washing their own hands., touching their genitals.

OP posts:
Original poster
Whyareyousoannoying · 29/01/2025 07:34

@DappledThings but there is a need. If you're coming home from work or school then onto
Public transport touching lots of surfaces.

Your hands are probably going to be worse than if you e just been in your own toilet for a wee.

OP posts:
DappledThings · 29/01/2025 07:31

LuckySantangelo35 · 28/01/2025 23:51

@DappledThings

can you remember to wash your hands after you’ve been to the bog?

maybe some signs would be a good idea

Show quote history

Yes, because that's when it is ingrained to do so and why sinks are right next to toilets. Like many other posters here it is not at all instinctive to wash hands just because I've been outside. No need for it.

AngelaMerkin1 · 29/01/2025 07:27

I’m always amazed how few people wash their hands, no wonder there’s always so many diseases circulating. Many don’t wash after going to the toilet, people pick their noses or sneeze into their hands then hold the hand rails or touch door knobs. The swabs from London tube rails show (literally) shit loads of E. coli etc on them. It’s revolting not to wash hands after using public transport.

Original poster
Whyareyousoannoying · 29/01/2025 07:13

It's interesting that it's the people who don't watch their hands who also seem to struggle with reading comprehension.

I said right there in my op that ds was coming straight in and getting food.

I also said he was the sickliest which he is, but I didn't say it was because of his hygiene in fact what I said was often it's probably just down to luck but hand hygiene wouldn't do any harm. Then someone mentioned blood groups and I said it was interesting because Dh has never had a sickness bug.

OP posts:
TethersMiddle · 29/01/2025 06:26

During the pandemic, people were shocked at the low standards of hygiene some people had. Now it seems there’s been a rapid return to be as lax as possible about personal hygiene.

Mademetoxic · 29/01/2025 00:06

TheFlyingHorse · 29/01/2025 00:04

I don't don't this and neither does anyone else in our house. Surely there are germs everywhere - indoors and outside. It's just not the kind of thing I give any headspace to.

You will essentially have other people's faecal matter and god knows what else in your house. Yuck.

tellmesomethingtrue · 29/01/2025 00:05

Kdubs1981 · 28/01/2025 18:18

This is odd. Why would he wash his hands?

How is it odd? His hands will have germs on.

anon4net · 29/01/2025 00:05

Yes, I would expect anyone to wash their hands when they return from being outside/in public especially after being on public transit. I also expect the same after using the loo and then again before eating.

I do this as someone who spent most of my career in the NHS and who regularly saw studies around preventing infectious diseases.

TheFlyingHorse · 29/01/2025 00:04

I don't don't this and neither does anyone else in our house. Surely there are germs everywhere - indoors and outside. It's just not the kind of thing I give any headspace to.

tellmesomethingtrue · 29/01/2025 00:02

Yes I wash my hands when I get home because why would I want to spread germs from my workplace around my home? Also remove my shoes.

caringcarer · 28/01/2025 23:57

TheAirfryerQueen · 28/01/2025 17:50

I don't tend to. My 18yo does, but I put that down to a legacy of the pandemic.

I wash my hands before cooking, and after going to the loo, all the usual things.

Edited for typos.

Edited

My 18 year old washes his hands a lot and still uses the gel. I'm certain it's the pandemic effect because he didn't do this before. It was so ingrained into him at his school and also at home I think he just does it now without thinking.

LuckySantangelo35 · 28/01/2025 23:51

DappledThings · 28/01/2025 23:16

I wouldn't think to. It's not like I'm going, "hurrah, I'm home. Going to take my shoes off now, hang my coat up. Wash my hands? Nah, I'm making a positive decision not to do that". It just wouldn't cross my mind. I'd have to get one of those "Now wash your hands" signs and stick up in every room.

Hardly ever remembered to do it during covid either. Again, not out of some actual of rebellion. Just not remembering.

Show quote history

@DappledThings

can you remember to wash your hands after you’ve been to the bog?

maybe some signs would be a good idea

JohnTheRevelator · 28/01/2025 23:45

After travelling on public transport,I feel like my hands have a layer of filth on them. So of course I wash them when I get in.

thaegumathteth · 28/01/2025 23:23

We all do wash our hands when we come in although tbh I don't always know if the teenagers have done it or not. Just think it's a bit gross to be touching buttons and handrails and doors etc and not washing them. I'm not a germ phobe but I am a bit reluctant to catch every bug going

DappledThings · 28/01/2025 23:16

LuckySantangelo35 · 28/01/2025 22:24

All those aghast at the idea of washing your hands when you come home….why exactly?! Can you really not be arsed standing at the sink for a minute washing your hands? It’s hardly some big imposition to your life is it??

I wouldn't think to. It's not like I'm going, "hurrah, I'm home. Going to take my shoes off now, hang my coat up. Wash my hands? Nah, I'm making a positive decision not to do that". It just wouldn't cross my mind. I'd have to get one of those "Now wash your hands" signs and stick up in every room.

Hardly ever remembered to do it during covid either. Again, not out of some actual of rebellion. Just not remembering.

Midnightlove · 28/01/2025 23:15

Daysgo · 28/01/2025 22:34

He started off just not washing his hands every time he entered the house, quite reasonably imo , and now all of a sudden he's the sickest one in the house , oh and also apparently prepping food🤣. Its ok op for people, even your close to adult son, to not agree with you on everything... Regarding shouting at you , I'd be annoyed , unless ofc you are shouting at him too or being completely ott and never stopping going on about washing his bloody hands.

He was always touching food.. did you not read the first post?

The food she has bought presumably, so yes he should wash his hands before he fingers it all 🙄

Jumpingthruhoops · 28/01/2025 23:00

saraclara · 28/01/2025 22:53

A relative once caught noro from someone passing them a sandwich out of the fridge at work!

You have no way of knowing that to be the case.

We 100% do actually, but thanks for your input.

Jumpingthruhoops · 28/01/2025 22:59

Whyareyousoannoying · 28/01/2025 20:38

I've already explained numerous times that he came straight in while I was cooking and started touching the food, opening the fridge, opening the cupboards, handling the fruit and putting it back.

I'm not sure how much clearer I can be.

It's my business if he's handling food that everyone is going to eat.

Or touching surfaces you're touching whilst prepping? All those areas should be germ-free...

MarCardarell · 28/01/2025 22:59

Whyareyousoannoying · 28/01/2025 18:10

Same, it's nothing to do with the pandemic it's just something I've always done.

At least someone is on my wavelength.

Show quote history

I'm with you! People say they wash their hands after using the toilet. You think everyone using the same hand rail or pressing the same lift button/ticket machine have washed their hands? No of course not 😜

MissRoseDurward · 28/01/2025 22:54

Always wash my hands when I come in. Using public transport, running your hand down the handrail on the stairs at the station... I don't see why some people see it as such an imposition. Come in, put keys away, coat and shoes off, wash hands. It's hardly a massively time consuming exercise, is it?

saraclara · 28/01/2025 22:53

A relative once caught noro from someone passing them a sandwich out of the fridge at work!

You have no way of knowing that to be the case.

Jumpingthruhoops · 28/01/2025 22:52

BellissimoGecko · 28/01/2025 22:29

This comment makes no sense.

First you say that washing hands will lower our immunity.

Then you say that we have all forgotten about washing our hands during Covid and that's why the bugs this winter have been so bad.

One of those can be true. Not both.

Show quote history

Exactly. This comment proves that now people are more relaxed about handwashing, bugs are rife!

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