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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to hate the way I look

43 replies

StrawberryJamx · 28/01/2025 10:21

Ladies I literally hate the fucking way I look. Always have done it’s just got progressively worse over the years 😔 I wear make up, I straighten my hair and literally nothing helps. I still look ugly. This isn’t a sympathy post at all I’ve been to therapy about it and nothing helps, I spent all of my pregnancies hoping and praying my children didn’t look like me and luckily they don’t. Is there anything I can do (other than a face lift! Or a face transplant) that can help my appearance? I’ve got 3 children and one is a toddler, I don’t really follow makeup that much and I’m not really good at it. I’m more of a plain Jane id say. To make this an Aibu, Aibu to literally hate the way I look?!

Aibu to hate the way I look
OP posts:
PeggyMitchellsCameo · 28/01/2025 10:37

It’s a real feeling and it’s horrible.
Having spent years working around beauty/style I had to evaluate images to use on social media - made me feel awful about myself!
But if this image had crossed my desk I would say….

  1. you have really beautiful eyes that are a gorgeous shade, they just jump out of the image.
  2. you have such glowing, clear skin.
  3. you have a fabulous heart-shaped face.
  4. shiny, shiny hair! Perhaps you could experiment a bit just for fun because you are lovely. And I just mean real basics we all try, like having some face-framing highlights, trying a new hair texture by adding some waves. But these are just to add interest or switch things up, not change how you look. One thing that changed things for me was getting my eyebrows done professionally they really frame the face - apart from that I’m a real DIY person! I would not change a thing about you.
clearskies24 · 28/01/2025 10:37

You are very pretty. I'd be happy to look like you.

MerryTealHedgehog · 28/01/2025 10:36

Sounds like body dysmorphia. I'd tell a mental health professional see what they say.

FoxtonFoxton · 28/01/2025 10:35

Lentilweaver · 28/01/2025 10:33

Absolutely. MN should delete. It wont help OP.

Show quote history

I agree. Also, someone will say something derogatory at some point and that will be all the OP can focus on. Would happen on any forum.

Kingoftheroad · 28/01/2025 10:35

Goodness you’re a beautiful looking woman

Mischance · 28/01/2025 10:34

Honestly you need help with this. It is a complete delusion. Don't go on through life like this - get some help.

Lentilweaver · 28/01/2025 10:33

PigInAHouse · 28/01/2025 10:31

This is a mental health issue rather than an appearance issue.

Absolutely. MN should delete. It wont help OP.

Esme32 · 28/01/2025 10:32

You're pretty! I can totally relate to your post though.

Runawaytrainer · 28/01/2025 10:32

You look completely fine!

Just personal preference, but I don't like straightened hair. It tends to make people's faces look big!

PigInAHouse · 28/01/2025 10:31

This is a mental health issue rather than an appearance issue.

BlondeMamaToBe · 28/01/2025 10:30

You’re being far too harsh on yourself. Work ion your mental health.

Catza · 28/01/2025 10:28

Is there anything in particular you don't like?
I don't want to invalidate your feelings but I am sure the majority on here will agree that you look absolutely fine and probably better than 90% of the population (including myself as I sit in front of my laptop this morning with zero makeup and frizzy hair in a pony tail).

BeyondMyWits · 28/01/2025 10:28

Yes, YABU. You look lovely. Your skin looks nice. Your eyes, in particular, are gorgeous.

FoxtonFoxton · 28/01/2025 10:28

You are not ugly in the slightest OP.

SallyWD · 28/01/2025 10:27

Honestly, not only do you look perfectly normal and fine, you're attractive. I can't see why on earth you think you're ugly. Have you looked around you? The vast majority of people aren't particularly gorgeous. There's more to life than what your (perfectly nice) face looks like. It's a shame the therapy didn't help.

CornishPorsche · 28/01/2025 10:27

If you truly hate your looks, you need professional therapy.

And I mean that.

Please seek help so you don't pass on such insecurity and self-hatred to your children - you want to be present for them, in photos with them, able to enjoy life.

Original poster
StrawberryJamx · 28/01/2025 10:27

mumofoneAlonebutokay · 28/01/2025 10:24

I've come to say yabu because you look good!

Who is your celebrity style icon? Maybe then some minor improvements can be made but you've got nothing to hate girl!

I don’t believe it when anyone says this. I mean how can I look good? I look like shit 🫣

I don’t really follow celebs if I’m honest, they make me feel worse cos of how beautiful they all are

OP posts:
mumofoneAlonebutokay · 28/01/2025 10:24

I've come to say yabu because you look good!

Who is your celebrity style icon? Maybe then some minor improvements can be made but you've got nothing to hate girl!