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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

My best years are behind me and I've nothing to look forward to

28 replies

RockStarMartini · 27/01/2025 22:44

I read this phrase on another thread (but this isn’t a taat really) and it summed up how I feel completely.

I’m early 50s with a child who recently left home so I now live alone. I do have a lovely partner but he feels like the only positive thing in my life - my job is unfulfilling and I’m not valued there, I earn a bit above average but my mortgage and bills take up most of it and retirement feels a long way away. My parents are ageing and increasingly in need of help that I don’t feel willing or able to give - it feels like a massive burden that’s only going to get worse. I’m always tired and I’m sad and fed up with how shit the world is.

I know it’s likely my age that makes me feel this way but I can’t even find the motivation to try and sort it out. What is the point once you’ve ticked off all life’s boxes? Education/house/marriage/kids/career - then what? I don’t have the time, money or energy for anything else.

OP posts:
mumofoneAlonebutokay · 27/01/2025 23:35

How long left on your mortgage? Can you downsize? You're in need of some travel and relaxation xx

Holesintheground · 27/01/2025 23:32

Come over to the elderly parents board to talk about setting better boundaries with your parents. It's hard but lots of us have been or are in that boat.

Cremeeggtime · 27/01/2025 23:30

The fact that your dc moved out recently might be part of this - it's an adjustment period for you. You have so much ahead of you at this stage of life, you can find out things you want to do for yourself, be a bit selfish if you want, make plans for travel or a new hobby or skill. If you're like me the winter won't be helping either. You might have ticked off life's big checkpoints, but that means what you do now is up to you - both scary but surely also exciting?
On a more practical level if you aren't on HRT I would suggest to start taking it.