To think this was really spiteful

Does Katie have ADHD?
Her constant distractions and cutting into conversations makes me wonder if this is an additional need.
I work with similar children and will tell them to stop. One word. Stop. I do then let them continue, but once they have made the right choice about it e.g. putting their hand up to ask for help or to ask if they can go on the computer.
Likewise the stickers should be rewarded for effort. Katie asking for one is not ok, and she should be reminded of that, but if she has worked hard I would especially be looking to give her the sticker (in reality I wouldn't give a sticker as this clearly causes a lot of issues so praise and encouragement for doing the work and over coming any difficulties should be the reward).
Maybe this TA needs some help in working with children with additional needs.

My god OP, both my kids are SEN and this has made me feel awful. Things there sound really bad. I'd be tempted to anonymously contact OFSTED if I were you.

I.used.to.work with someone like that. It's a power thing. All the students hated her. When.i left I.noticed.someone had drawn.devil horns, and a beard on her staff communial wall photo! I'd give her a sticker the next day, for something unrelated.

horrible! please call her out on it so she doesn’t repeat it with more kids. awful!

If I found out any member of staff tried to teach my young daughter the lesson she can’t ask for what she’s earned, wants or deserves, I’d tell the member of staff straight, then complain to rhe head, I’d complain to the governors and I’d spam every parent group letting them all know what little lesson she tried to teach my child.

and quite frankly I’d not stop till she was fired or it became so uncomfortable she had to leave . And demand she wasn’t allowed near my child again, and im sure plenty of other women would stand beside me.

And if she asked for it to stop, I’d have much joy in telling her you don’t get when you ask. That as a female she should know her place.

and I’d continue to re enforce to my child that if you’ve earned it you’re entitled and you do get to stand up and say so.

Wow, just wow. I get the impression that if you left the school then the kindness would leave with you so I applaud you for staying and assume you do it for the kids as the school sounds like something from Matilda🤬
Please speak to a union rep and arrange a meeting with the head, chair of governors and a union rep and state you are whistle blowing. I've done it before about a teacher with the head and it was taken seriously. I felt crap doing it, but for my own mental health had to. I work with lots of low ability, disadvantaged children and they all need confidence boosts and praising to understand their worth.

As a TA with this year group she'd hate me🤣😂 I give stickers, stamps and treats as a way of encouraging the children. Some struggle with things so feel dejected when doing the lessons so need a boost. This week alone I've given out stickers, biscuits, fidget toys and chocolate 🤣😂
Personally I'd speak to the teacher and also start a paper trail via email of everything.

Some of your updates are genuinely shocking, OP.

I am a governor at our local
primary school and urge you to become a whistleblower and contact the Chair of your school’s governing board.
The TA and teacher incidents in themselves are bad enough to be reported to governors, but the real stinger here is that when you have raised concerns, nothing has been done and your perception is that nobody could care less.

PLEASE check the school website and e-mail the governors giving full list of incidents that you’ve witnessed, which ones you have reported, and what was (or wasn’t) done about them.
Also be clear that you feel nobody on the Senior Leadership Team (SLT) cares.
Tell them it is a safeguarding risk that can’t be ignored.

Good luck, and thank you (on behalf of the children you are advocating for).

As a TA, defo give the child a sticker . As a colleague ? Defo have a word !!!

Yes, and even if she had said can I have a sticker, which she didn’t, that would be something to applaud.

im pig sick of people putting little girls down. Telling them they can’t ask. Punishing them for doing so. Teaching them that heinous lesson they will carry forever. Know your place, you don’t get to ask for what you want or earned

even on here you can some people relishing this little girl being taught that lesson.

She didn't ask for a sticker though. She received good feedback for her work and in response to that, she asked whether it met the threshold for the reward that she'd seen others receiving in the past. I don't think it's fair to say that's cheeky/entitled when it's the same idea as what we would do to request a pay increase or apply for an internal promotion at work.

A geologist came into my class, she very kindly brought in some rocks etc, several kids asked if they could have one to take home, I think that's rude (not even a please). Kindly, she has actually brought one in for all the kids to take home, some asked for another one. Then some said to her they had got a rubbish one, were there any more. It starts small, can I have a sticker but it does give a sense of entitlement.

Children are not always taught these things at home so I always try to err on the side of making in a teaching moment.

Yes Mrs Faulkner you were a cow.

The TA is a nasty, sad, bitchy, piece of work. The child was, perhaps for the first time in ages, being happy with herself - and the adult crushed her. I gave out stickers galore - for trying, for being neat, for smiling... so by the end of the day, everyone got one, and yet, everyone was pleased because the reasons were different, and not 'we all got a sticker anyway'; there was a reason for being given the sticker.

This just makes me sad! That TA had Katie exactly where she wanted her; excited and proud. That sort of thing is a good motivator to learn the next thing. And she threw it away. If a child is engaging don't kill the engagement!

Poor Katie. Some people shouldn't be in education she sounds horrible.
I'm with you on some teachers not being knowledgeable. My ds is dyslexic but one of the teachers made a point of writing narky comments on his work. I ignored it mainly because he didn't understand how mean she was until she wrote on his work "you're a human been Fred you can do this". Well that was the day I corrected her and went in to say I wasn't happy with the way she corrected him when she couldn't do it herself. I was polite and she apologised and didn't do it again. I am just glad he hadn't realised what a cow she was.

This actually happened to me in year 2, and I remember it even now.

Everyone had behaved really well in P.E, and we had a little magnetic board in the classroom with yellow tokens for each child in a row. On the way back Mrs Faulkner said everyone gets a token.

I wasn't badly behaved but I was poor and scruffy, so I got picked on and ignored by the teacher a lot, I didn't get many tokens. So I asked her in surprise, "Miss do I get a token as well?" And she replied, "Yes I just said everyone didn't I? No actually you don't get one now for asking silly questions"

I was so mortified and upset that I've never forgotten it. I felt so ashamed and embarrassed, I never wanted to ask a question ever again. Mrs Faulkner, you were a cow.

Yanbu OP nobody knows how little it takes to knock a child's confidence.

The TA has an inflated opinion of herself and needs talking to. Disgusting thing to say, somebody should have jumped in and said " you can have one from me though, well done"

This is child abuse. You need to escalate this. Send an email to the head about it so that there is a paper trail. List everything that she has done and explain that you are not prepared to sit back and allow this to continue. Then follow it up and keep following it up with emails. People don't like things that leave a trail - it's harder for them to ignore because if she fails to do anything, you could escalate this and you now have evidence that nothing was done. Keep a log of everything and keep informing the head. It's not going to be easy for you, but it never is for whistle blowers.

Wow! What a poor excuse for such vile behaviour! Its a frequent thing with SEN kids these days usually blamed on funding, I don't dispute there are funding issues but every child deserves a chance right!. I don't know weather you've seen it but there is actually a petition set up on behalf of a SEN parent to get cctv put in SEN schools. This was as a result of her non verbal son being in the play area outside with a TA and being captured on the cctv for 20 minutes kneeing the poor lad in the back and everytime he went to stand he threw him back down to the floor! It was Purley down to this cctv that he was found out and prosecuted. My point being is that I can imagine it starts off with a few nasty words here and there and then that eventually progresses to physical assaults. I would honestlytake your concerns higher /outside the school if no one within the school is willing to safeguard the children within the school. You sound like a lovely caring TA x

No it’s not rude, but some people want to teach little girls they shouldn’t ask for what they want, need, or have earned.

if anything she should have got a sticker for asking.

I’m not sure that asking whether she’d get a sticker is rude. In the workplace, you are told that you’re responsible for your own career and if you’re taught it’s rude to ask whether the work you’ve done is sufficient for a reward, then this will make these conversations feel awkward and unnatural.

@Stopbeingsomean you sound like a wonderful TA who has exactly the right empathetic and nurturing skills to do the job properly.

The purpose of the intervention with a TA will have been to give the 3 children more attention from an adult so that they can independently and confidently do a particular task (in this case subtraction). It shouldn’t get derailed by a perfectly innocent question about stickers. Leave petty quibbles about “not asking” for another time or ask the teacher to mention it if you’re really that bothered!

Safeguarding trumps everything, as OP has correctly pointed out from another occasion.

That's incredibly mean. What a knock for the poor girl. Some only work with children because they like the power/being in charge.

My DD recently had parents evening. Her maths teacher told me she gets sheet stickers because DDs class will work for stickers harder the the schools reward point system. DD was thrilled with a pizza sticker she got. She's in year 11 and in the run up to sitting GCSEs.