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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think this was really spiteful

289 replies

Stopbeingsomean · 27/01/2025 22:30

I work as a TA in a primary school and something happened today that made me really sad.

I was working with a group of ten children, split between three adults. We were working on subtraction with this particular group who really struggle with maths.

I heard the other TA tell a child she had done very well. The little girl was really proud of herself and had a huge smile on her face and asked “Am I going to get a sticker Miss?” The TA looked very sternly at her and said “Katie, stickers are given out at my discretion. I decide when to give them. I was actually going to give you one, but as you have asked, unfortunately I am not going to give you one now” Honestly she looked devastated. She’s 7 years old.

AIBU to think this was really spiteful?

YABU - She should not have asked.

YANBU - She deserved a sticker

OP posts:
3peassuit · 27/01/2025 23:06

Plain nasty. It’s people like that who turn children off learning. I’d take it higher if the manager won’t do anything.

Original poster
Stopbeingsomean · 27/01/2025 23:06

gingerandsmall · 27/01/2025 23:05

Does your school do low-level concern reporting? If so, this type of behaviour is exactly what that system was made for and I'd submit one to your head about the incident.

I can promise you it is pointless. No one cares.

OP posts:
gingerandsmall · 27/01/2025 23:05

Does your school do low-level concern reporting? If so, this type of behaviour is exactly what that system was made for and I'd submit one to your head about the incident.

Original poster
Stopbeingsomean · 27/01/2025 23:04

Morecoffeeforme · 27/01/2025 22:56

What a bitch. Can you report her to the head?

And please give the girl a sticker

Spoken about her twice now but no joy. Also a teacher who was kicking children with her foot when they were sitting on the floor and she wanted them to move back. No joy there either!

OP posts:
Morecoffeeforme · 27/01/2025 23:03

I wonder if you could find a way to tell the girls parents.

if this was my child I’d want to know and I would be raising bloody hell with the head

Original poster
Stopbeingsomean · 27/01/2025 23:02

Quinlan · 27/01/2025 22:49

I’d be discussing that with her manager. This is a little girl who probably doesn’t get many stickers for maths, she worked really hard, she did well and felt so happy for herself that she was excited she might get a sticker… and she is 7! Of course she said it out loud. That TA shouldn’t be a TA. Having a power trip over a 7 year old.

I’ve told my manager twice about the way she speaks to the kids but unfortunately they don’t give a shit as long as there’s a body teaching.

Last week I heard her saying “Well! From what you’ve just done I can tell you do not know your tables. You should be on at least your 5’s by now. I will be speaking to your teacher about you” She also said “Tell me why you went to fetch glue? Did I ask for glue? No! I did not! Now get on with your work”

OP posts:
ThatsNotMyTeen · 27/01/2025 23:01

Mean

Barney16 · 27/01/2025 23:01

What a meanie. I hope no one ever gives her a good work sticker.

Augarden · 27/01/2025 23:01

Why are people like this with little children, I really don't get it!

joyouslady · 27/01/2025 22:59

What a bitch!

Onekidnoclue · 27/01/2025 22:57

She’s punishing the girl for asking for something she’s entitled to!!! What a miserable cow.

Morecoffeeforme · 27/01/2025 22:56

This has made me both sad and angry

Morecoffeeforme · 27/01/2025 22:56

What a bitch. Can you report her to the head?

And please give the girl a sticker

Darkmorningsarethepits · 27/01/2025 22:56

I would raise that with the head/manager

Feels like an adult on a power trip which is rubbish when working with kids but particularly awful in a small group situation for kids with SEN.

Horrible and has made me sad to read.

Vaxtable · 27/01/2025 22:54

That’s nasty. I still remember 50 odd years ago when I got 10 out of 10 for a test, I was so pleased. I made the mistake of tracing pencil over the 10, no idea why I was 7.

The teacher saw and immediately crossed it out and gave me a zero. I hated that teacher and her lessons from then on and just stopped working in her lessons.

That sort of thing really discouraged kids, and as you say is spiteful

KittyEmK · 27/01/2025 22:53

That's very controlling

Original poster
Stopbeingsomean · 27/01/2025 22:53

latetothefisting · 27/01/2025 22:44

why are stickers given out at her discretion and not yours given you both do the same job and were working with the kids as a group?
Couldn't you have just given Katie one afterwards?

Sorry! That’s my poor explanation. We work as a group with individual children assigned to us each if that makes sense.

OP posts:
Apillthatmakesyousayalltherightstuff · 27/01/2025 22:53

Cruel. Please give the girl a sticker yourself ASAP. Just so unnecessary. Keep an eye on that TA for other nastiness if you can.

Ottika · 27/01/2025 22:52

sounds like a power tripper.
likely has little control in her own life. miserable behaviour.

Yeh, I'd mention it to her, or someone higher up. This kind of crap doesn't help kids.

Original poster
Stopbeingsomean · 27/01/2025 22:52

Wemaybebetterstrangers · 27/01/2025 22:36

That’s awful. Who does she think she is?? Not a nice person. I’d give that poor child a sticker to cheer her up.

I actually thought about giving her one myself, but she’s not assigned to me and it would go down badly I think.

OP posts:
TheFormidableMrsC · 27/01/2025 22:51

Yes she sounds like an absolute twat. What a spiteful thing to say. Yes I would say something.

MrWise · 27/01/2025 22:50

Give that girl a sticker, stat!

Quinlan · 27/01/2025 22:49

I’d be discussing that with her manager. This is a little girl who probably doesn’t get many stickers for maths, she worked really hard, she did well and felt so happy for herself that she was excited she might get a sticker… and she is 7! Of course she said it out loud. That TA shouldn’t be a TA. Having a power trip over a 7 year old.

Ophy83 · 27/01/2025 22:49

If I were you I'd find an opportunity to give the little girl a sticker tomorrow

Moier · 27/01/2025 22:45

TA thinking she's more important than she is.. she's not the teacher or head teacher.
Very spiteful.