Nearly 50 and feel totally exhausted and overwhelmed with life, is this all there is?

Definitely. I agree.

Yes loads of people cI know including myself Is it possible the dark cold winter is getting you down and making everything worse? It is doing so for me. Soon it will go lighter and warmer, can you shave some time off all the chores to fit in sime you time a walk in park, visit nearest seaside anything that is different ?

That's sad. Sorry for your loss IP.

A nice sociable hobby once a week could lead to some new friendships?

Do you really believe everything you are told? Would you please explain to me how dogs were left alone for decades without any ill effects and yet now they can't possibly be left alone for over four hours? What do you think is going to happen to them? Why are dogs in other countries able to be left but not in the UK? I have no further wish to derail the OP's thread either, but honestly after being on MN for a few years I am so pleased I don't live in the namby pamby UK. Btw I have had three dogs, all were loved and cared for and perfectly happy - even though we sometimes left them all day while we worked or went away for a day.

This - in spades

Peri or menopause. I felt like this until I realised. HRT. Life changer. Lower standards and take up hobbies

Do all these jobs around the house have to be done there and then or are you the sort of person who can’t just sit and read a book or watch TV?

You could be here for another 50 years. It sounds like you have very little enjoyment.

Are you a creative person?

It depends on a number of factors though doesn't it?

Like whether you are walking in a nice park or on the beach or simply walking around a housing estate because you have to drive to a scenic spot.

And whether you live with other people and your daily dog walk is your way to get some time to yourself and listen to a podcast in peace. It won't be the same if the OP lives on her own all the time.

And she said she adores her dogs but she is spending money she doesn't have on them and worrying about their health. And there isn't anybody else to help her.

And finally she is tired and walking her dogs when she feels exhausted isn't quite the same thing either.

It really baffles me why people can't put themselves in other people's shoes before replying.

It's crazy that people are acting as if there's something wrong with you because a third of your life is being wasted on your job and the rest of your awake time is being wasted due to exhaustion from your job. It is surely normal to feel this way...it does not necessitate a trip to the GP. The only way out is to find an alternative way to live.

Ask for your bloods to be done. You could be low in B12, iron, folic acid. Any of these can result in low energy and low mood.

Awe lovely, not far behind you age wise and can relate. Losing your girls group must be hard. Not having time or energy or money a triple whammy. Have you thought about volunteering? Appreciate time/energy/money might preclude it but found the best way to suppress overthinking and feeling life has lost colour or meaning is to give back. You’d meet a host of lovely new people, learn new skills and make a difference.
Menopause also no fun. Takes a lot of women to the edge of themselves. To answer your Q: is this it? Yes and it’s short, we aren’t coming this way again so carpe diem. Really hoping we can all (somehow… do talk s* sometimes but mean well) manifest you a wee bit colour and purpose back into your day. If you’ve not seen it watch After Life. It’ll make you laugh (and cry) and it’s a touching reminder to cherish the moment and that in the ordinary there is also the extraordinary.

Yes, I agree. It can be hard to cope with the day to day needs of animals when depressed so hopefully the OP will get some help from her GP

Nah, this is it. We DO just exist, and then we die. Everyone gets the existential dread at that age when this realisation dawns. It's a bit of a shock when it comes. You spend your life working towards some distant goal of "becoming an adult, and getting the full blown adult's trappings of life, including house and kids and career". And after those goals are achieved........then what? Some people have a mid-life crisis. Others just feel a bit flat. But eventually I think most pick themselves up and think "ah, well, better make the most of it then." OP, you're probably on the cusp of thinking that there's nothing for it but to make the most of it.

I don’t want to derail OPs thread any more because she has already confirmed that her dogs are not left alone all day.
Your comment is clearly ridiculous though because the RSPCAs recommendation would still apply irrespective of where the dog lives!

@Blusterylimp it was an addition to my post, to be clear that's why I don't have all the aggro of looking after dogs. Obviously that's a different workload but if the agg and expense of it is weighing on her so much rather than the love eclipsing that, it suggests a depressed perspective rather than the problem being situational. So it's good that she's going to the GPs.

Well strangely enough dogs managed alone by themselves for many decades, and still do. It seems dogs these days, much like modern children, seem to require constant entertainment. Also, did you miss that I don't live in the UK so the RSPCA has no relevance here.

Oh hun, I know how you feel. I'm fed up of "just existing" there's gotta be more, surely, there's gotta be more.
Where do you live?

OP has already said she loves her dogs and they are her priority but that doesn’t mean that they aren’t a lot of work and expense. The two things are not mutually exclusive.

Oh forgot to say I don't have, and couldn't be arsed with any, dogs. I guess that's a personal decision but again you've gotta own it and not treat it like you're saddled with them. If you chose them, they must be worth the aggro.

So let's get this right - your children are preteen but you're a similar age to OP however her children are all grown. Which must mean that you had a whole chunk of your 30s child free at exactly the time that OP was in the same full on parent mode that you've been in for the last decade.

OP's main child free time is just starting now, she's put the work in with the child rearing thing. You had YOUR main child free time BEFORE you had your kids. ie. when you were still in your prime of life, with the child birthing and rearing exhaustion yet to come. So there is clearly going to be a great deal of difference in how OP feels about and approaches her child free stage of life compared to how you approached yours in your 30s. She's experiencing it having put in the best part of 2 decades of child rearing and working, which as you admit yourself is exhausting. Give OP a break. You haven't done that for 2 decades yet. Let's see how you feel when your child free time comes when your kids are flying the nest. I think you're not realising how much you still worry about their wellbeing even when they're adults.

I'll get flamed for saying it, but that's where you're going wrong right there. You're making your life pointlessly complicated and expensive.

I'm nearly 50, kids are teens, work more than FT in a self-employed gig that's hard but fulfilling and I do almost FA housework. The kids are fed and a cleaner comes every other week for 3 hours but beyond that I do no drudgery. The house is hygienic and the laundry gets done, but it's no show home and domestic shit doesn't matter. I put my energy into creative project and friends I love and feel that's staved off the middle-aged angst so far. YOLO and all that so don't settle for anything you don't have to. If you want to take any risks, now's the time. If you don't, that's okay too but own your choices and don't just bumble along as though you're pleasing some authority that doesn't exist. We're the grown ups at this point and if you can't own your decisions now you never will. Do something different tomorrow. What's the worst that'll happen?

The RSPCA would disagree. They say a dog shouldn’t be left for more than four hours.

I felt like this at 50 ish, but took a broken ankle to really knock me turns out I had kidney disease & autoimmune conditions. I was lucky I was able to retire at 55 but no children to worry about. The other thing vit D was really low & also HRT were the initial medication that helped. It was a combination of things that triggered it stopping smoking, menopause & work stress. See your GP try & get them to do your ANA not always but can be indicative of autoimmune.