6 year old using the word "babe".

I was thinking Bluey too.

Speak to his teacher OP, they'll know him better and be better at identifying problems.

It does sound all a bit weird, and absolutely horrific if it's racially motivated.

Not surprising hearing that a forces community is racist tbh. Sorry this is your experience.

But the vast majority of children do know instinctively. They know that a play leader or teacher is not the same as their mum or dad. They can tell from the way people around them talk about the school/clubs that it is not the same informal environment as home. This really did not used to have to be spelled out to children, certainly not beyond a couple of weeks of Reception year.

I'm sorry op, I hope I'm wrong as this stuff is never nice 🥺 but that is what it sounds like

For what its worth, I'd be careful how you handle racism, because if you come right out and accuse them, theyll start playing the victim

if you're on good terms with your ex, and don't want to pull ds out, I'd involve him xx

Edit, typos

There's an episode of Bluey where Bluey and bingo call everyone babe my 5 and 7 year olds thought it was hilarious. Youth club sound weird, no need to phone just explain to the child not to use that term of phrase if they don't like it.

well done, good deducing, most impressive !

It's the 'talking about knives and guns' for me

Im here like sureeee

Whoa. Top marks for intuition, @mumofoneAlonebutokay

And to add, even if he was mentioning guns, it was surely in a childlike way like lots of boys do. They're an army base, i cannot see an army base having an issue with gun play?

And which was it, knives or guns?? How was he playing knives?? Guns makes sense but what 6 year old kid runs around pretending to play with both 😅

Their racism is so obvious to me. Even the way they've phrased it seems like a dog whistle 'going on about knives and guns'.

Im sorry girl but this is your answer ❤️

Im not someone that sees racism everywhere either

But if he was white working class, him calling kids babe wouldn't be an issue

Going on about knives and guns?? At 6?? Sure

And then asking about his background is code for - are you a single mum, wheres his (implied blsck) dad

Its clear to me that that's what it is.

Not sure how you'd proceed, as this sounds like your community?

His dad could go and speak to them, which I'm sure would change their minds. I'm disgusted by them and would not be returning, myself

Sorry x

All boys play guns at some point, even those who grow up in toy gun free homes. There's studies on it. Completely normal and it ramps up when they mingle with children with older siblings. Speaking from the experience of being a toy gun free house, and having a 6 year old who learned an extensive gun vocabulary shortly after starting school! And just count up how many of the lego and playmobil sets aimed at his age come with tiny guns and swords (anything with police, pirates, knights etc)

And the babe thing could be from the bluey episode where they role play the parents. My parents have called me babe my entire life, and my boy is frequently referred to as my baby. I actually think it's weird that the group are sexualising it or making a big deal when they could just say "it's Mr XYZ actually"

There's a child at my sons school who is very tactile, I don't think a conversation about consent will hit as well as just simply doing what this child's parents do and just say "personal space, please" . It's a much easier message to understand.

I really don't think there's anything that troubling in your son's behaviour, just minor natural adjustments needed.

Lots of kids make guns and knives out of Lego, even ones who don't watch violent programmes.
I agree with a PP about this being related to you and your son's ethnicity. There's something really off in the way they didn't tell you everything in one phonecall and then can't really explain what they mean.

Hmmm I think you may have the very grim answer here 😔 there’s clearly something about your son that unsettles them and given the lack of real facts I’d say this is worth looking into. I’m so sorry, I wouldn’t be sending him back regardless of whether it’s a ethnicity discrimination or not, none of it sits well and could end up giving him a complex

Children copy. My little nephew keeps calling my dad ‘old mate’ and ‘old fella’. No idea where he’s got it from but it’s clearly something he’s head somewhere.

I'm surprised at these responses. It's not something I'd mention to a parent, but calling someone in a position of authority a term of endearment (babe, darling, mate even) is just completely inappropriate and I really don't think it would have happened 15+ years ago. Would you have called a teacher babe/darling/mate at aged 6? I cannot even begin to imagine doing so and cannot imagine my own 6 year old doing so now but it's becoming more and more common for children to have to be explicitly told this.

I think this is weird behaviour from the youth club.

Whether Babe is considered appropriate is entirely subjective and there’s no solid reason for that to be any kind of concern. Loads of people call others babe as a term of endearment.

My DS is nearly 6 and him and his friends regularly mention things like guns, knives etc. It’s not ideal but it comes from action type programmes and toys. It’s not unusual at all.

Im a social worker and don’t find either of these concerning, unless there are other factors to be considered alongside.

Is your ds black or mixed raced? They want to understand his 'background' screams to me that they're fishing to find out whether you're a single mother

And the talk of knives and guns, hmm

Ringing back is even stranger. Why didn't tell you everything at once?

It's an army area, & there's concern about guns ???