To think that wolf whistling wasn't such a bad thing?

I remember a relatively local story some years ago in the press. Young girl out, late teens, out clubbing with friends in Glasgow. Spurned the advance of a 30 something bloke, total stranger to her. So far, so normal. He came across her again later that night in McDonalds. The knock-back had obviously been festering, because apropos of nothing, he pepper-sprayed her in the face.

She's one of the 'lucky' ones, of course. Wasn't like he killed her. Probably wouldn't take a terribly deep dive into the annals of crime to start coming up with stories of women and girls who've been murdered because they had the temerity to say 'no' to an entitled bloke with a massive but fragile ego and who saw woman as nothing more than chattel.

But, of course, it's the WOMEN who need to learn resilience.

Don't worry @NovemberMorn

Girls still know how to handle themselves, I have two DD late teens now and they both know all the 'handle yourself' tricks.

They know to get cab's home even if they can walk and preferably in two's.
They know to never leave their drinks on the table in case they get spiked.
They know to cross the road if they can sense a male behind them
The knew from a young age to find a women if they felt threatened or were being followed
They know not to put ear phones in when walking to give them the best awareness of predatory males.
They know to take the long route if the short route is not well lit
They know not to make eye contact or react if an unknown male makes lewd comments etc.

They also know these ways to 'handle themselves' will never stop males making lewd comments towards them or raping them

Don't you worry @NovemberMorn girls still know how to handle themselves because it's such a good thing that they have to.

Again, I don't care. I have no interest in men. Your desperate need to jump in and defend them is sad.

Sorry OP but I’m finding some of your responses a bit silly.

Questioning if this is genuine.

Or, God forbid, people could behave in a polite and respectful manner to other people, including not making any kind of passing comment on stranger’s appearance or sexual attractiveness, and then no one would need to “handle themselves”.

It's a public forum. I'm entitled to my opinion, as are you.

Not all men are the same. Same as not all Mumsnet posters are opposed to people having different opinions like you are 🙃

I mentioned above that I was aged 10-14 when I was regularly wolf whistled at/cat called etc on my way to school and home. Should I have been ‘street smart enough not to get the vapours’ then?

I don't care? Again, stop trying to make this thread about poor men.

And sexual harassment from ANY person is not acceptable.

I am talking of women being street smart enough to NOT get the vapours if a man dare look at them in an appreciative way, or God forbid....actually whistle

You talk very much like an MRA/incel. Your dismissal of women not wanting to be harassed in public whilst going about their business is disturbing.

Reported crime*

Many men are sexually harassed but don't report it. Sad but true.

Is it ok for 11yo girls to be wolf whistled at OP?

I found wolf whistling intimidating, threatening, and sinister. It stated that my body existed for their pleasure, with an undertone of what they wanted to do to me. Beginning from when of an age to still be in school uniform. Appalling.

@AlbertCamusflage "BUT I still reeeaaallly wish I could wolf whistle. I tried to learn , in my youth, but couldn't get hold of the knack. It seemed to be something - like cycling without holding the handlebars - that required testicles"

Oh, I wish I could too! My DS had to do it in a play for 6 performances and he nailed it every time. People thought he was a sound effect. I was soooooo jealous!

No it’s not ok. Not least because I personally experienced it from the age of 11 by often middle aged men. I can’t see how that’s harmless

V disappointing backwards step from Joanna. Also just seen Joanna quickly and subtly shut down by Lucy in an Amandaland promo interview, she described Amanda as more ‘batty’ before. 🙄

It was horrid being catcalled and whistled at as a preteen and young teen and beyond. Awful and thats in this country. Aswell as stalking and "men" not taling no for an answer. Yuck!

Late 40s.

Joanna Lumley was born into a life of privilege. She has had power since she was old enough to walk. Talking about people being tougher then is fucking ridiculous when she hasn't any idea what it is like to grow up with no power at all. Rejecting advances when Daddy is a Major and Mummy's family are close friends of the Dalai Lama is a bit bloody different to rejecting advances when Daddy is in jail and Mummy is barely braking even.

Besides, she almost 80 years old. The reality is that her opinion on what because should or should not be acceptable is less and less relevant. As ever, the young will get to dictate what is and is not acceptable to them. They will shape the world as they want it and won't give two hoots what JL thinks about it. Good for them.

When I was young, it was totally normal daily thing , but ovbs not pleasant.
now my 19 year old daughter is constantly harassed in the worst way , not wolf whistling now
its horrible comments on what they want to do to her etc . It’s completely relentless, she’s a really beautiful woman striking!
she’s taken to wearing a hat and oversized clothes even dyed her hair , naturally blonde! All on London streets and commute and constantly trying to blend in
it’s unacceptable behaviour from men
so furious that this is the case today, and there’s nothing one can do about it
in our current culture

How old are you?

Women and girls didn't simply 'handle themselves' back then. When they were abused or assaulted nobody listened, or they were blamed, and we didn't talk about it because we were the ones made to feel ashamed.

It wasn't talked about, it was just accepted as a part of life.

It's not more prevalent, it's just more spoken about now.

Your assertation that women just don't handle themselves any more is victim blaming.

@NovemberMorn

Hand maiden comes to mind