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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to have babysitting rules...

185 replies

finalstrawb · 26/01/2025 07:25

... if I didn't ask for the babysitting?

We have very little support from family due to geography, but we make it work and never ask for help. MIL and FIL have asked to babysit as they love our DS - lovely for all of us, DS aged 2 gets time with GP, we get a few hours to ourselves. Babysitting between 12-5. WIBU to ask them to do no television. We severely limit screen time as DS is a bad sleeper and we find it helps. Also no sugar etc but we leave meals and snacks prepared.

If I requested childcare I wouldn't set rules but in this case AIBU? He has lots of toys and healthy snacks, they don't have to do anything except play with him (DS very spirited!)

OP posts:
Rachmorr57 · 26/01/2025 07:44

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Bumbers · 26/01/2025 07:44

I don't think it is unreasonable at all!!

Original poster
finalstrawb · 26/01/2025 07:42

Has nobody except Minnie read the bit where I said we don't need this and haven't asked for it? They asked!!!! They're also wonderful GP and I know they crave alone time with our little one and don't want to deprive them but should I be kept up all night because of it?

OP posts:
Original poster
finalstrawb · 26/01/2025 07:40

I take your point however I am doing this for their benefit, I have to arrange 3 meals (DS lunch and tea, their lunch), clean the house, arrange all spare clothing... I don't want then to be kept up all night with a screaming overstimulated toddler when I have work in the morning. I haven't asked for this. It's nice but it's not a favour- I said yes because I recognise its important for DS to bond with GP. I don't think no tv and no juice and chocolate is unreasonable for a 2 yo for a 5 hour period? Different if they were 5 maybe but he's 2!

OP posts:
MinnieBalloon · 26/01/2025 07:40

YANBU. If you don’t need them to babysit then if they don’t follow your rules they don’t get to 🤷‍♀️

We are a no screentime family for the kids, they also only drink water and don’t have much in the way or chocolate/sweets etc. They’re also ERF.

If someone wasn’t willing to follow our rules then they don’t get the privilege of looking after our children. It’s no skin off my nose 🤷‍♀️

ThejoyofNC · 26/01/2025 07:39

You either want their help or you don't. It's not a paid for service and you can't dictate how they spend their time (unless unsafe).

Shoes232 · 26/01/2025 07:36

No. Just be happy they have offered

Theextraordinaryisintheordinary · 26/01/2025 07:33

You really can’t suggest that when someone is doing you a favour.

We don’t have a television in our lounge and our kids rarely watch the one we have in the snug. We occasionally watch things together as a family. I despise how the tv dominates so much. I think it’s something like 12 years of our lives are wasted on it. Nevertheless, I still let my in-laws watch too much tv with our kids as I’m just so grateful they’re having them and I get to have some time off!

SixOver · 26/01/2025 07:33

In my very limited experience GP are there to spoil the GC. Biscuits and TV will come out and tbh I was always just grateful DS was with loving family and having a great time with them. They'd always take him to the woods too so a bit of downtime and a treat is lovely for him and them 😁

However, you can certainly ask. Would it really bother you if they did TV and biscuits/or whatever?

Rachmorr57 · 26/01/2025 07:28

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