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AIBU?

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Original poster

To want to go in my garden without my neighbours being intrusive

219 replies

RandomMess · 25/01/2025 14:41

As soon as the neighbours spot either of us put in either our front or back garden they mysteriously need to come outside for a wander and then just have to interrupt us.

I get their world is small but I just want to be left alone to do what I need to.

It is ruining any enjoyment I could potentially have if I ever actually got to use my garden instead of avoiding being out there at all.

I need to tidy up after the high winds. Managed to be out for 10 minutes max before they appeared so I've come in for a cuppa.

Sad
OP posts:
Disenchantedone · 29/01/2025 10:01

I totally understand your frustration. I have one neighbour who moans about absolutely everything. I have things in my life way more important than her endless moans. If i hear her, i tend to hide in another area of my garden so she doesnt know i am out, as i really just want to tell her to fuck off i have more important things to worry about. Sorry you have no escape. You could put headphones on and 'pretend' you are doing a course and have papers to listen to. Or say i'd love to chat but i have to get this done by 11am as i have an important call. Tell any sort of lie.

Screwcorona · 29/01/2025 09:26

Have you asked them to give you privacy?

They're being rude and intrusive so don't feel like it's rude to say so

Botanybaby · 29/01/2025 08:55

It's their garden if they want to go out in it then they can if you don't like it move out

Melsy88 · 29/01/2025 07:32

I have a similar thing, except my neighbour appears at her upstairs window (semi detached house) and starts chatting to me from there every time. Can't even build a fence 😭 drives me insane as feel I can't enjoy my garden in peace.

Northernladdette · 29/01/2025 07:16

High fences make for good neighbours 😂

MsDitsy · 28/01/2025 09:18

Could you try doing the same to them? For each question you field, ask them something personal. For example, was that you I heard having sex last night, it was really loud, no? Oh sorry, must have been a fox. This trench I'm digging nope, it's a grave for someone annoying. The work I'm having done, oh, what works have you had done? At a stretch, I would dress in a long black dress and make a noise in the garden at 3am so they asked about it and tell them i was casting a new spell. I could go on and yes I'm pettyier than a petty thing but your neighbours would infuriate me.

Vettrianofan · 27/01/2025 20:50

Pippyls67 · 27/01/2025 01:08

Talk to them at very great length about something that does interest you but don’t let them get a word in. Make it totally one sided and boring for them. Don’t let them change the subject. They’ll soon stop bothering you. Reverse psychology.

Kill them with friendliness.

Porcuporpoise · 27/01/2025 19:54

BettyBardMacDonald · 27/01/2025 15:44

"Oh Bob, I'm so happy to see you. We're inna bit of a pickle with some credit card debt; would you be able to lend us £3-4k? We could repay £50 a month after we get our holiday paid off."

"Oh Bob, good morning; have you thought about making us that loan? We're getting a bit anxious."

"Bob, we could take a cheque right now..."

"Bob? Hope all is well, haven't seen you in the garden lately. Oh and about that loan, we're still seeking some funds but a bit more as the boiler is acting up.. Bob?"

Genius!

HelenaTranscart · 27/01/2025 19:08

Bamboo grows very quickly and very high, and solved a similar problem for us.
I feel your frustration

Original poster
RandomMess · 27/01/2025 17:44

@ohfourfoxache

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

OP posts:
BettyBardMacDonald · 27/01/2025 15:44

"Oh Bob, I'm so happy to see you. We're inna bit of a pickle with some credit card debt; would you be able to lend us £3-4k? We could repay £50 a month after we get our holiday paid off."

"Oh Bob, good morning; have you thought about making us that loan? We're getting a bit anxious."

"Bob, we could take a cheque right now..."

"Bob? Hope all is well, haven't seen you in the garden lately. Oh and about that loan, we're still seeking some funds but a bit more as the boiler is acting up.. Bob?"

Honeysucklelane · 27/01/2025 15:37

An invisibility cloak is your only answer! They sound very bored and in need of conversation. Erect 6ft fences pronto!

ohfourfoxache · 27/01/2025 15:23

Sod the neighbours......have you cancelled the cheque? Grin

Fraaances · 27/01/2025 14:43

“Jeeze Bob, You’re a Misery Guts today. Has she kicked you out to come and bother me? That hardly seems fair!”

”You’re especially gloomy today Bob… Did you forget to take your Prozac?”

”I know you’re not supposed to talk about it, but how long were you with the KGB, Bob? Have you interrogated anyone famous? What is your real name?”

BettyBardMacDonald · 27/01/2025 14:26

Rawnotblended · 25/01/2025 14:42

“Let me tell you all about Our Lord Jesus” and chat for ages with a cheery smile and no eye contact.

never fails.

This is good.

Or perhaps ask if they could lend you some money.

ThisDearWriter · 27/01/2025 14:04

Mumoftwochildrenand6furkids · 26/01/2025 19:00

I have an chair in my passageway right near the front door sometimes if i just want an little fresh air I sit there and thats when i noticed when ever i open my front door the women next door opens her door too no matter what time of day it is its just strange.

I know how you feel, I have like a carport and every couple of hours I like to have a cigarette and no matter what time or when I do my neighbours happen to come out or let their dogs out at the exact same time even worse if I’m sat with someone as they will listen in to my conversation. Its so annoying don’t get the obsession.

laraitopbanana · 27/01/2025 13:54

if You smile and don’t listen… you might find yourself in some pickles and neighbors telling you you agreed to keep their dog/cat/beloved grandma whilst they are on holidays 😆

laraitopbanana · 27/01/2025 13:52

“ I am going to have to leave you now”. Stay seated. Look the other way until they go.

👏🏼🌺

Pippyls67 · 27/01/2025 01:08

Talk to them at very great length about something that does interest you but don’t let them get a word in. Make it totally one sided and boring for them. Don’t let them change the subject. They’ll soon stop bothering you. Reverse psychology.

TheMauveBeaker · 26/01/2025 21:24

I’d move, no question. There’s clearly no suitable solution at the moment and from what you’ve said, there may never be one.

godmum56 · 26/01/2025 20:57

welshpolarbear · 26/01/2025 20:49

No idea but he’s been here 50 years. He’s not going to stop now, I have mentioned it a fair few times. I try and get ahead and tidy it myself so he doesn’t take it lower.

Show quote history

dammit!

welshpolarbear · 26/01/2025 20:49

godmum56 · 26/01/2025 20:39

who owns the hedge?

Show quote history

No idea but he’s been here 50 years. He’s not going to stop now, I have mentioned it a fair few times. I try and get ahead and tidy it myself so he doesn’t take it lower.

godmum56 · 26/01/2025 20:39

welshpolarbear · 26/01/2025 19:03

Op, I’m here with solidarity, I have the exact problem. It drives me up the wall. I have trees and bushes I can hide behind but invariably the second I step out I’ll realise my error.

They’re actually really nice, mid 80’s, but ALWAYS in the garden, and if not they’ll be out if I go.

Their summerhouse is raised and on the top of the garden slope so they’re like all seeing eyes. It’s depressing!

Even putting washing out becomes a mad dash to not get caught 😔

I planted a tree on the border last year. There’s a hedge between us and he’s constantly shearing it lower. I’m hoping the huge tree I’ve planted grows quickly 😂

who owns the hedge?

needhelpwiththisplease · 26/01/2025 20:12

No fence
No headphones
Just" sorry can't chat now"
" unavailable to listen at the moment "
Don't engage just repeat

Teddybear23 · 26/01/2025 19:54

My Dad always said ‘tall fences make good neighbours’! I agree. Put a 6’ fence up but when at the front getting in your car for example always be polite and friendly to them to prove you are not bring rude.

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