Dumped by a voice note after 12 months

I know someone who was dumped by text. They’d been together 20 years, married, dc….

So it could be worse.

They’re all wrong 😁

Well I don’t know, lots of people on this thread describing it as being FWB and even the OP says it’s basically that. I hadn’t heard of it before.

IME these situations never really turn into genuine friendships as there's always that underlying sex aspect running through the friendship, potential jealousy when one of you meet someone new etc (likely what has happened and why he's ended it) Best to have a clean slate and start afresh without him

Rather over dramatic.

Just block.

Regular shagging without needing to care, commit or be faithful.

I’m in the ‘don’t reply, don’t block’ gang

Any reply or reaction of any kind (including blocking) will provide him with clues about your feelings. Best not to give him any clues, then he doesn’t know whether you are sad, angry, completely indifferent etc. It’s way more confusing that way 🤣

There are times to direct your energy onto having the scathing last word but this ain't one of them.

He treated you like shit during your "situationship" and yet you seem disappointed and surprised he's doing the same now he's ended it? He knows he's being a wanker but he doesn't actually care and he certainly doesn't want to be your friend.

I'd suggest don't reply, don't block and just keep a busines-like distance at work. Anything else is just a waste of you precious time and energy.

Oh gods, is this where we discover that 'situationship' means 'random shagging against the filing cabinets in the broom cupboard'?

A voice note? I have heard it all now. He didn't give you the opportunity for a conversation about it or a right of reply so PLEASE do not dignify this fuckwittery with a call/message/voicenote. Delete, block and move on with your life.

He’s not your boss is he OP?

There's no way you can know he's exclusive with you in a situationship, IMO. With the update that you work together: just leave on read and ignore him as much as possible in the future.

When my ex of nearly 2 and a h years dumped me by fone I was heart broken. When he contacted me a few weeks later to ask.me to return his keys I did not reply. I remember thinking, silence is my weapon

I personally think it's ok to finish a casual relationship by voice note or with a message.
It was casual he owes you nothing. In a casual relationship you shouldn't get attached or care too much otherwise you will get hurt.
Also maybe don't have situationships with people you work with

Friends? Sorry, you don't fuck your friends - he fucked you figuratively and literally. It is a slimeball way out - 'oooh, let us be friends'. Of course you can't stay friends with him! Why would you want to? He dumped you - he thinks he can do better - and you were even entertaining the idea of being friends? Have some self-respect. At least when Carrie in SATC was asking Big to be friends, she was angling for a multi-millionaire to subsidise her shallow life, but surely he is not a zillionaire?

A ‘situationship’ isn’t the same thing as friends with benefits though. It falls right in the middle of that complicated space between casual sex between friends when both of you happen to be available and in the mood, and a full blown relationship.

I find that ‘situationships’ are relationships where one party is more into it than the other, while the other doesn’t want to actually commit, but quite likes the regular sex and emotional closeness that can be really comforting, until someone better comes along, when they can merrily skip off, safe in the knowledge that they can’t possibly have hurt anyone’s feelings because it wasn’t a proper relationship and they were technically single.

My thought, exactly!

Look, get real. You should be annoyed at yourself disrespecting your own boundaries. You do not want to be friends with this man you were hoping he would change his mind and commit to you. He's probably not going to do that now because you've proven you don't respect yourself and we're willing to let him walk all over you. Get real, tell the truth, look after yourself rather than expecting random men to give a shit. They won't until you do

Take the initiative and block him - why would you want to stay friends with someone who treats you that way? Thank goodness you know what he’s like now and not several years and children later.

Just move on and look to to future, reply with a thumbs up (quite vague) and block. Not worth another thought.

Don't respond and act like he never existed. Move on and "wash that guy right outa your hair"!

I think focusing on how he did it is a coping strategy for how you feel about the ending of it.

You say you knew it was coming. So either you've already talked about it, in which case, why go over it again. Or, you've been sitting on issues, so also not speaking up face to face.

Not sure there's much point in trying to maintain a friendship between two people who aren't great at communicating with each other.

And yes, what he did was cowardly and awful. Hope you're ok.

Don't block him, as it makes it look like you care.
Just never reply.