How much does your teen cost?

You don’t need a £500k salary to spend a few hundred pound per month on your teenager. 🙄

Just don't forget to give them some of what you had as it made you the person you are

I grew up poor and want my children to have more than I had. It doesn’t mean they’re spoilt, they’re not. Spoilt to me means having a bad attitude and being entitled. You don’t have to be tighter than you need to be to teach your children to be good people and the value of money.

Absolutely but I didn't expect it to be 90% of mumsnet

You must be new then! 😆 500k salaries, 2m houses are the norm.

Absolutely but I didn't expect it to be 90% of mumsnet

Did you grow up having to go without often? I did, and I find that people who grew up how I did often have the view that their children should have to face the same lessons. I now work with a lot of people from completely different worlds to me and they tend to have the opposite view. I have to say, over the years I’ve come to see that perspective more. Why should my children have to face struggle just because I did?

I grew up pretty comfortable but my parents are immigrants from not much. My mum in particular was quite strict on materialistic things so often said no. I think it was quite good for me personally & do the same for my dc.

Yeah I grew up in care so was on my own
And although that has taught me what to do differently with my kids in the sense of being their for them physically and emotionally there is definitely some positive skills that came from it i do want to pass on such as resilience, managing money, living within your means, not being reliant on others, working for what you have.

Surely you understand that there are people who live different lifestyles and have access to varying degrees of wealth?

Per month for 16 yr old

£100 (inc gym membership)
£30 for a weekly club/activity
£50 on average for clothes and shoes (complete guess, usually stock up when season changes if there’s been a growth spurt)
not much on transport (in Scotland so free bus pas, live in urban area so almost always gets the bus)
£20 skin care stuff that usually pick up when shopping (routine stuff needed not fancy brands or anything)
Takes packed lunch to school so maybe £40 per month

£350 on bread. (Not really, but a lot of toast gets consumed!!)

After that, holidays, birthdays, Christmas.

Driving lessons followed by uni about to drive up the cost significantly!

we don’t get child benefit, so the government definitely doesn’t pay for ours (apart from bus pass).

Did you grow up having to go without often? I did, and I find that people who grew up how I did often have the view that their children should have to face the same lessons. I now work with a lot of people from completely different worlds to me and they tend to have the opposite view. I have to say, over the years I’ve come to see that perspective more. Why should my children have to face struggle just because I did?

15 year old

(£32 a month) £8 per week pocket money
(£60 a month) £5 per hour she does her voluntary charity shop job (normally £15 a week)
£3.99 a month phone
£16 a month Spotify (we both use)
(£13 a month) £75 a year Rugby subs (£50 a pair of boots a year, general rugby clothes subsidised heavily by club + driving to matches)

Anything she wants, meal deals, cinema and Costa comes out of her own spends)
Anything she needs I pay for and she has free access to take lunch from home.
I go 50/50 on her gifts to friends and family.

Clothes she happily gets from charity shops, more expensive items she craves from Disturbia or similar are Christmas and birthday gifts or her own spends.

Total £135ish a month base rate + food + utilities + eating out + regular theatre trips for us both

I feel so different to everyone on this site you all seem to have easy and blessed lives. Where everyone just gave you stuff I didn't realise this was a thing apart from obviously a few spoilt rich kids

Sorry. I thought I was quoting this.

Unless your spending £400 on berries every month for one child it's not the same. I won't be giving my kids anything after 16 apart from the food we all eat and a roof over there head. If they want stuff they need to earn it. I'm excellent at budgeting and managing money and that's because I always had to.

Not everyone's life is full of financial hardship. My life certainly isn't and neither is my DDs.

But she's never had to fight for it, she's never had to go without. She made a decision that she would only eat high quality wholefoods with no money to fund it so her mum has jumped in to give her that don't you think it would be better to say if you want luxuries in life you have to work for them and then when you have saved enough then you can have them. People shouldn't always be getting what they want instantly

But she's my child, who made a decision around 14 that she wanted to only eat whole foods. Of course she has no money to fund it, she's a child. Why would I make her go without when I can afford to allow her to eat healthily?

Not a one off treat in our case, no.

I also feed DS berries every day - now he’s 5 currently, but at what point should I stop just in case he’s accidentally living the high life as a teen? I’d be interested to see your list of what you spend on yours, as you haven’t actually given it - just bitched complained about everyone elses decision.

Pocket money £100? Phone £50?

My teens never got that. It's high I think.

Transport - £10/month or so (in London so buses are free. Occasionally she gets the tube here and there but not often

School dinners - £50

Pocket money - £60

Dance - £120 + probably around an extra £50 on average for competition entries, new costumes, etc. There always seems to be something!

Clothes - I’d guess around £50

Phone - £35

Spotify - £5 (I used to have the individual but she wanted her own profile so I’m factoring the additional cost in)

So about £380 in total. Then there’s the odd “can I have £20 for So and So’s birthday present” or what have you here and there.

Thank you @LittleRedRidingHoody

My 17yo dd cost me nothing other than food and general household bills. She had a pt job from 16 (alongside college) and bought her own clothes and make up. She also paid for her own driving lessons (no way I could afford it.)

If she needed new shoes or trainers I would pay half and she'd pay half.

She worked at Primark earning £11 an hour so was earning £100 plus a week working over the weekends, more in school holidays.

I'm proud I have raised her to work hard and understand the value of money.

That is not the same as something like a holiday is a one of treat for the whole family. Funding someone to live the high life isnt

Horse loan/riding £250 ish (she's there 3 times a week & it's the only activity she does so it's worth it!)
Lunches approx £20
Bus approx £20

Not too bad although last month was expensive as she needed loads of horse stuff
I'm going to encourage her to get a p/t job when she can. I think it's really important for them to earn their own money.

But she's never had to fight for it, she's never had to go without. She made a decision that she would only eat high quality wholefoods with no money to fund it so her mum has jumped in to give her that don't you think it would be better to say if you want luxuries in life you have to work for them and then when you have saved enough then you can have them. People shouldn't always be getting what they want instantly

People are different, some people will spend lots on their dc & think if they can support like this forever it doesn't really matter. Others can afford to but feel they want to teach different lessons. Ours are not teens yet & we save for uni & a house deposit. They will have to get a job at a certain point to help if they want additional things.