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DS living illegally in USA

116 replies

WorriedFfamily · 24/01/2025 21:52

DSister met someone on Tinder and moved to The USA on a normal tourist visa (3 months I think it was?) in 2021 to see them. Fell in love and ended up staying illegally. They split up and DS started a relationship with and moved in with someone else. DS is still there illegally.

The current boyfriend works in immigration and seems to think that despite DS having been there illegally for a while now if they get married she can legally become an American citizen. DS has said she hasn't looked into it as she trusts boyfriend and he works with immigration and his firm are willing to support the application to become a legal citizen. DS has also said they have all the forms and just need to get married to start the process.

From my Googling it would seem they can get married but DS will have to leave and apply for citizenship from home (The UK). But then she'll be caught as an illegal when she's leaving so would she be allowed back into The US? I don't think she's even willing to leave anyway so that's all a bit moot.

DM and rest of family are so worried but don't know enough about becoming an American citizen. To me, this seems dodgy but DS will just get stroppy if we keep asking questions and say why can't you just be happy for me? Which yes we are as long as this gets sorted. Does anyone know the process, is it as easy as she's saying? I'm hoping if we're armed with the facts she might listen to us. Obviously the Trump administration could change everything anyway but as it stands is it really that easy to become a citizen as long as you marry an American? Are we being unreasonable to think it's not as easy as she seems to think?

OP posts:
GoldenGail · 24/01/2025 23:37

Rocksaltrita · 24/01/2025 22:07

Really? She’s managed to stay there all that time and never come to the attention of the authorities? Hasn’t needed any medical care, had a smear, hasn’t needed to leave for a funeral in the UK, hasn’t had a bank account or a driver’s license? Interesting…

Yeah. I did it for nine years

Christmasandallthetrimmings · 24/01/2025 23:35

Hi OP, I went through similar in The USA in recent years. Yes she can adjust her status there if they get married and he (or he and his family who are willing to support her) earns over a certain amount..but I don't know what it is. There's so many immigration lawyers out there, she can get the help and information she needs. She will be in the process for a Green Card, which is a permanent residency card. But it takes a while though, and she has to stay put. She can't even fly to a different state as they check your passport. After some years on a Green Card she can adjust to Citizen and get a passport. This was still possible under the previous trump administration, and as far as I know, no massive changes were made under Biden so it's the same system.

Bigcat25 · 24/01/2025 23:33

Catofthesouth · 24/01/2025 23:05

i have my friends fake social security card, she got it in uptown Manhattan. I have been known to flash it when I don’t want to say who I am. It cost 50 bucks. No problem if you know who to ask; loads of illegal brits! Any pub on Broadway in NYC you can get a contact.

Sorry if this is a dumb question, you mean a contact for fake ID? Why don't you want people to know who you are? I'm not American, but nobody would use a SIN as ID here.

LuluBlakey1 · 24/01/2025 23:32

ThatEllie · 24/01/2025 22:59

He most likely has a green card now if he’s been in California since the 90s and has worked in ag/landscaping. California has had plenty of schemes and opportunities for people to get them over the decades because of the huge demand for that sort of labour.

I hope he has. He's such a kind, gentle person. I hate to think he could be ill and alone with no care out there. He has worked in a garden centre too so surely must have paid taxes?

Mumtobabyhavoc · 24/01/2025 23:29

I'd take my chances driving to Canada and flying to the UK from there. Then I'd trrrrryyyy my luck at a proper US residency application. It won't likely happen, because you can't fake an earlier departure date, but at least you won't have the arrest, detention and deportation to deal with - not to mention looking over your shoulder and wondering if someone will turn you in. That will happen.

Per previous poster legal advice would be best.

https://www.gov.uk/world/british-embassy-or-high-commission-canada

PokerFriedDips · 24/01/2025 23:18

IANAL but I think the thing about having to leave to apply for a new visa is only if they arrived illegally in the first place. OPs DSis entered legally and then overstayed so is in a slightly better position. However she needs a top quality immigration lawyer not a bit if Internet forum advice from strangers.

Justsaywhatyoumean123 · 24/01/2025 23:15

I overstayed and got deported. It wasn't fun, but it wasn't awful, a life experience.

dixon86 · 24/01/2025 23:14

She needs professional advice. Not internet hearsay on MN

Pallisers · 24/01/2025 23:14

I live in the US. This is a disaster waiting to happen. She has no legal status and no health insurance.

To be honest, I'd be more worried about the lack of health insurance than legal status - what's the worst that can happen? They will deport her to the UK - not the hell holes other illegal immigrants will be deported to. But lack of health care could financially ruin her.

And if she needed to return to the UK in a hurry - well she will never enter the US again.

Nothing you can do though OP.

Ilovelifeverymuch · 24/01/2025 23:11

WorriedFfamily · 24/01/2025 22:51

He works for an immigration legal firm. Honestly so glad I posted now, this is such a relief, it's difficult but CAN be done which is better than we thought!

Your sister seems to be making silly decisions that can have serious ramifications.

Fortunately for her yes she can legally naturalize as a US citizen if she gets married to a citizen given she entered the US legally using a visa. If she entered illegally eg through the land border then she would have to leave and have an immediate 10 year ban. There are waivers that can be applied for in the case of marriage to a US citizen but it's complicated and it's usually advisable to engage an immigration lawyer.

I'm not really sure how relevant it is that her BF works for na immigration firm. I guess if he is an immigration expert or lawyer then his knowledge will be helpful but the company will not be involved in a way to sponsor his wife.

And I would advise the engage a lawyer just to make sure everything goes smoothly and because I think she will need waivers for any potential bans due to overstaying. If she can't afford it is unwilling to engage a lawyer then she needs to be ready to put in the work and time to research but from what I need she seems to be the type who keeps their head in the ground and avoids dealing with issues until it blows up.

There is only so much you can do, she's an adult and she and her BF need to sort it out.

www.rebeccablacklaw.com/visa-overstay-and-marriage-what-immigrants-need-to-know/

penelopelondon · 24/01/2025 23:07

@Rocksaltrita Really? She’s managed to stay there all that time and never come to the attention of the authorities? Hasn’t needed any medical care, had a smear, hasn’t needed to leave for a funeral in the UK, hasn’t had a bank account or a driver’s license? Interesting…

I lived 20 yrs in the US, You can perfectly have medical care (private), a smear, open a bank account and have a driving license if you're illegal, just DON'T leave for a funeral in the UK.

Catofthesouth · 24/01/2025 23:05

GreenTeaLikesMe · 24/01/2025 23:00

Are you expressing skepticism of the OPs story? There are actually quite a lot of situations like this. It is not uncommon!

i have my friends fake social security card, she got it in uptown Manhattan. I have been known to flash it when I don’t want to say who I am. It cost 50 bucks. No problem if you know who to ask; loads of illegal brits! Any pub on Broadway in NYC you can get a contact.

Matronic6 · 24/01/2025 23:03

Rocksaltrita · 24/01/2025 22:07

Really? She’s managed to stay there all that time and never come to the attention of the authorities? Hasn’t needed any medical care, had a smear, hasn’t needed to leave for a funeral in the UK, hasn’t had a bank account or a driver’s license? Interesting…

This is actually very common in the states. I know of at least 4 people who went to America and overstayed their visit for longer than this.

GreenTeaLikesMe · 24/01/2025 23:00

Rocksaltrita · 24/01/2025 22:07

Really? She’s managed to stay there all that time and never come to the attention of the authorities? Hasn’t needed any medical care, had a smear, hasn’t needed to leave for a funeral in the UK, hasn’t had a bank account or a driver’s license? Interesting…

Are you expressing skepticism of the OPs story? There are actually quite a lot of situations like this. It is not uncommon!

ThatEllie · 24/01/2025 22:59

LuluBlakey1 · 24/01/2025 22:15

I have been wondering about the son of old friends (now in their 80s) of my parents- he moved to LA in 1990 and has never been 'legal' as far as his parents know. He has had lots of jobs gardening and in garden centres but must be about 60 now. Has never married. Is gay. Never been home since because he says he would not get back into the US, although his parents have gone out there several times. I saw him when I was out there in 2000 and 2003. He's lovely but has had alcohol issues at times and has moved around a lot. Been there coming up to 35 years. Will he now somehow have been given a 'green card' on that basis? After a period of time do you become 'legal'?

He most likely has a green card now if he’s been in California since the 90s and has worked in ag/landscaping. California has had plenty of schemes and opportunities for people to get them over the decades because of the huge demand for that sort of labour.

AcrossthePond55 · 24/01/2025 22:57

WorriedFfamily · 24/01/2025 22:51

He works for an immigration legal firm. Honestly so glad I posted now, this is such a relief, it's difficult but CAN be done which is better than we thought!

If he works for a legal firm, I'm sure she'll be fine. They'll be abreast of the latest changes.

I'd have the firm 'officially' handle her case, though. Not just do 'silent advising'. Like I said, things are in flux here and if the shit should hit the fan about people being 'deported to file' having an 'official' lawyer attached to her file may be a factor in whether or not she has to leave.

I didn't work for ICE, but I did work for the Govt. And I can tell you that cases with attorneys tended to be handled with kid gloves, because no one wanted to end up in court. Cases with attorneys had higher approval rates, too.

JeremiahBullfrog · 24/01/2025 22:56

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

biscuitandcake · 24/01/2025 22:55

WorriedFfamily · 24/01/2025 22:02

Well we're after advice I guess. If what DS is saying is true then we can stop worrying but we need to know if there's a chance this will work out or not because DM is worried and I hate seeing her like this

What exactly is your mum worried about? I think it's normal/reasonable to be worried about her as a parent (my mum would also worry if I was doing this). If you break it down though, either they sort out the visa issues and it's fine. Or they don't Dsis is deported/prevented from reentering the country in which case she is back home with you her family. Yeah sure she would separated from a man she loves but there wouldn't be physical harm and she would be back with you and out of incredibly feckless relationship.
Actually the worst situation is if the current relationship dragged on indefinitely but still there are only two ways it would eventually resolve.
I am not saying you are wrong to worry. But if you look at what the worst case scenario is, it's still manageable/possible to recover from.

AworkQuestion0hours · 24/01/2025 22:52

What made her do that?????

WorriedFfamily · 24/01/2025 22:51

He works for an immigration legal firm. Honestly so glad I posted now, this is such a relief, it's difficult but CAN be done which is better than we thought!

OP posts:
Sesame2011 · 24/01/2025 22:51

Sorry OP, I don't have any advice.

What I will say though to other posters is that there are millions of people living illegally in the USA. Many of them are successful and run legal businesses, own homes and even pay taxes. It's not all about cash in hand jobs and relying on other people.

AcrossthePond55 · 24/01/2025 22:49

I'm in the US. FWIW things are in such crazy flux right now that I wouldn't depend on anything staying the way it is. But if your DS's BF works 'in immigration' he may know whereof he speaks. But 'working in immigration' is a vague term. Unless he works for ICE, an immigration legal firm, or a reputable advocacy group, I don't know if I'd take his word. If he doesn't work for one of these three, she needs to take legal advice before doing anything.

Basically yes, if your sister marries a US citizen there is a pathway to a green card (permanent residence).

At this point (I mean today, right this very minute) if she's here illegally and married she won't have to leave the country to file for legal status. The expected change to having to leave before filing is aimed specifically at asylum seekers and 'others' who are here illegally, specifically those from and at the southern border. I can't see them seeking out and kicking a Canadian or a Northern European back across the northern border. In other words, if your sister is white and from the UK she's not who they're looking for. But again things are so crazy now, who knows who they'll 'come for' next.

Gymmum82 · 24/01/2025 22:49

My friends parents lived there for over 40 years illegally.
Worked cash in hand jobs, lived in a trailer, so were never wealthy and could obviously never leave the country. But they accessed healthcare and lived comfortably for a long time.
They returned to the U.K. when neither could work any longer and had no means to support themselves.
It’s possible though not the best idea that she could stay illegally long term

UnicornWorld · 24/01/2025 22:48

HeddaGarbled · 24/01/2025 21:58

What difference does it make whether she listens to you or not? What will happen will happen and you can’t change it. You’ve had your say, now let her get on with it.

She is allowed to worry and want to helo her sister.

MrsCarson · 24/01/2025 22:44

I extended my tourist visa we used an immigration lawyer, So I ended up there a year legally. We got married before the year was up and applied for my green card. It all came out fine but I had legally extended from within the country, not sure they let you do that now. Citizenship takes years I had kids by then.