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To wish I had a sister

206 replies

Briannaco · 24/01/2025 16:49

My mum has four sisters. They've supported each other through every stage of life.

Now in their 60s and 70s, they all go for lunch together every two weeks. They all ring each other every week and tell each other what's been happening each week, and they support each other over the phone.

They are all close to each other. However my aunts are not like that to me. I think because they have so many nieces and nephews they are not really close to any of us.

But the five sisters themselves are close.

I have no sisters. I have one older brother. If I ring him and ask him any questions or ill try to chat to him, he will just reply with one word answers. He is very untalkative and unsupportive. He never asks me about my life. It's like having no one.

I just feel like life would be so much better having a sister and I feel sad ill never have one. My mum said that her friend was saying the same thing to her the other day. My mums friend has no sisters and she said that she'd love to have a sister.

OP posts:
Briannaco · 24/01/2025 17:26

Oh well!

Maybe next life, I'll have a sister

(I believe in reincarnation)

OP posts:
Birdbox181 · 24/01/2025 17:25

graygoose · 24/01/2025 16:52

Just to add, I have a group of very close girl friends that I’ve been friends with for nearly 20 years. As far as I’m concerned they are my sisters - got me through IVF, divorce, everything. And I also have a useless older brother so I feel your pain! Found family can be just as amazing x

I had that, we were friends since school, so 30+ years. The group has suddenly fallen apart, it's been absolutely heartbreaking. There's no guarantee of anything in this life.

OP, your mum has been very lucky, I don't blame you for wanting the same. I have an older brother too who is not supportive at all.

LostittoBostik · 24/01/2025 17:23

Having said that my mum is not close to my aunt at all - in fact she's been a regular source of hurt for her. So I know it's not a given.

SkaneTos · 24/01/2025 17:23

Briannaco · 24/01/2025 17:19

Is he older or younger than you?

Out of interest

My brother is two years older than me.

LostittoBostik · 24/01/2025 17:22

I wish I had one too. I see my young DDs' relationship and I'm sad that I didn't have that growing up. I see my friends with their adult sisters and see what I'm missing out on at this stage of life. I have no siblings. I don't feel lonely but I'm sad that it's a common part of life that I'll never experience

SnidelyWhiplash · 24/01/2025 17:22

I have 3 sisters. All older than me. We’re all on good terms and go for lunches etc. They’d probably say we’re extremely close, but I’m nowhere near as close to them as my girlfriends, several of whom I view as family and genuinely love.

In my mind, friends are the family you choose.

Timble · 24/01/2025 17:21

I have a sister, there’s a 7 year age gap and we’re not close at all. We didn’t fall out we just have nothing in common and very little to talk about. I’m closer to my brother who is 15 months older than me.

Comedycook · 24/01/2025 17:21

Icedpumpkinspicelatte · 24/01/2025 17:03

I'm really close to my brother. I don't have a sister but every woman I know who has a sister isn't close to their sister. It's nothing to do with gender. I'd say the connection between your mum and her sisters is very rare.

Every woman I know who has a sister is close to them.

Lavenderflower · 24/01/2025 17:21

There is no guarantee but most people I know with sister or girl cousins tend to be closer than those with brothers.

boulevardofbrokendreamss · 24/01/2025 17:20

I haven't spoken to my sister in 5 years

Quittingforlosers · 24/01/2025 17:20

My sister is a cowbag who bitches about everyone and managed to turn my folks against me.

My brother is awesome though.

ThisBreezyQuoter · 24/01/2025 17:20

I agree with the majority of posters. Not all sister relationships are like your mum and her siblings.
My sister is the female version of your brother.

Briannaco · 24/01/2025 17:19

SkaneTos · 24/01/2025 17:18

I'm sorry to hear that your relationship with your brother is not what you want it to be.

I'm a woman. I don't have any sisters, but I'm happy to say that my brother is one of my best friends! We are close, very similar humour, and we can talk about most things. I love spending time with him.

Like previous posters have written, not all sisters are close.

Edited

Is he older or younger than you?

Out of interest

OP posts:
Briannaco · 24/01/2025 17:18

I didn't have any grandparents at all either.

I feel like I was really lacking in family.

I would have loved to have a grandmother

OP posts:
SkaneTos · 24/01/2025 17:18

I'm sorry to hear that your relationship with your brother is not what you want it to be.

I'm a woman. I don't have any sisters, but I'm happy to say that my brother is one of my best friends! We are close, very similar humour, and we can talk about most things. I love spending time with him.

Like previous posters have written, not all sisters are close.

Craftysue · 24/01/2025 17:17

I've got 2 sisters - one I get on with ok, the other one I've not spoken to for 15 years. I've got a couple of very close friends and I feel like they're family to me

Matildatoldsuchdreadfullies · 24/01/2025 17:17

My mum (who cheerfully admits she only really wanted boys), was desperate for me to have more than one DD because... well, sisters.

My dsis and I rolled our eyes very hard at this, pointing out that she wasn't particularly close to her sister. We may have also pointed out just how much we fought.

Briannaco · 24/01/2025 17:16

ssd · 24/01/2025 17:15

I feel the same

Yes!

It's lonely .

Especially when I look at some of my friends who are really really close with their sisters.

OP posts:
Briannaco · 24/01/2025 17:16

PuffinLord · 24/01/2025 17:14

If you’re feeling the need for more supportive female friendships, that’s understandable, they are very important in my life.

But maybe stop idealising/imagining that you’d automatically have that with a sister? I have two of them, one is a total PITA and brings nothing to my life, one I feel close to but we only speak every few months/see each other every couple of years.

Youd be best off focusing your energy on building stronger friendships with others than looking for something more from your brother.

I just think it's cause I don't have much other family either.

I didn't have grandparents or a dad. My aunts wouldn't really be that interested in me either.
I have a mum. But I would have liked more family - like a sister, grandparents, dad etc.

Friends are good.

But sometimes I think that you really need family too

OP posts:
ssd · 24/01/2025 17:15

I feel the same

PuffinLord · 24/01/2025 17:14

If you’re feeling the need for more supportive female friendships, that’s understandable, they are very important in my life.

But maybe stop idealising/imagining that you’d automatically have that with a sister? I have two of them, one is a total PITA and brings nothing to my life, one I feel close to but we only speak every few months/see each other every couple of years.

Youd be best off focusing your energy on building stronger friendships with others than looking for something more from your brother.

Fetburzswefg · 24/01/2025 17:12

I understand where you’re coming from - I have a sister who is my best friend, I would hate to be without her. You do hear of many people who have a very poor relationship with their sisters though, so there are no guarantees.

I hope you have or can find friends who fulfil this desire for you ❤️

Briannaco · 24/01/2025 17:12

apricitykomorebi · 24/01/2025 17:11

@Briannaco He never rang me all year, except once when he wanted something. He never asks me about my life ever.

May I ask how old he is and what your relationship was like when you were kids and teenagers?

He's two years older than me.

I guess when we were young kids we got on OK. But as teens he definitely got more sullen and rude.

As we became adults he's just got more and more kind of self absorbed. He never asks anyone else what they're doing in life.

He's just rude every time I see him

OP posts:
apricitykomorebi · 24/01/2025 17:11

@Briannaco He never rang me all year, except once when he wanted something. He never asks me about my life ever.

May I ask how old he is and what your relationship was like when you were kids and teenagers?

Guttedandblue · 24/01/2025 17:10

My sister is four years older than me and has always hated me just for existing. I’d love to have had a sisterly bond with her but there was never any chance of that.
She even manipulated my mother into cutting me out of her will.

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