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Original poster

Feeling pressure to let my dc go out alone to play

44 replies

ItsLateItsDark · 22/01/2025 21:20

My ds is 8 and most of his friends are allowed to the park by themselves. He's started asking if he can go and I'm feeling like I should let him.

To me 8 is too young to go out alone. If it wasn't for his friends already going out I would happily leave it till he's about 10.

Aibu not to let him out or unreasonable to feel pressured to let him go?

OP posts:
Jobsharenightmare · 22/01/2025 21:48

I played out with friends from 8 and was in an argument with a child my age one day about who had the longest hair. Her older brother came into the park and beat me up when she told him I was saying I had nicer hair. No adults present to protect me. Wait!

Franjipanl8r · 22/01/2025 21:48

Nah my 8 almost 9 year old doesn’t go anywhere alone.

Sorrypinkfish · 22/01/2025 21:38

Trust your gut.

spoonfulofsugar1 · 22/01/2025 21:35

Definitely not and my eldest is 8. Some children do play at the park at the end of the road on their own from the same year but I'm still saying no.
I look at it like this... what will i likely regret more? Not letting them play out? Unlikely. Or letting them go too early and something happening?

CagneyNYPD1 · 22/01/2025 21:35

Dillydollydingdong · 22/01/2025 21:25

Did you go out with your mates to play when you were young? I bet you did. You've got to let him stretch his wings sometimes, and be with his friends.

But things are different now. Sadly.

We did play out from about 7 or 8 but our older siblings were out too. Not engrossed in their phones/screens. The older ones looked out for the younger ones. We knew most of our neighbours and which front doors we could knock on in an emergency.

Curtainqueen · 22/01/2025 21:34

OP, what age did you go out to play?

confusedlots · 22/01/2025 21:33

I have an 8 year old, who is very sensible, and I definitely still wouldn't let her do this.

Newstrongerme · 22/01/2025 21:33

No, too young. Your instincts are right.

Needanewnameidea · 22/01/2025 21:32

Depends on the park, the journey there and the friends.

Mine aren’t allowed until y6, mostly because there’s usually teens hanging around at the park doing stupid things and I’m told by a friend in the police it’s a known location for county lines activity. Even then in y6 it’s daylight only, only in a group of friends (who I know and also know their parents), with a phone and once they’re used to crossing the roads to get there independently.

At 8, not a chance. I might feel differently if we lived somewhere that didn’t involve a busy road and where the park was less of a magnet for teenage antisocial activity. I am happy to have the children’s friends hanging out here though - often my garden becomes the equivalent of the park!

SuperSleepyBaby · 22/01/2025 21:31

My 8 year old can play outside our house. I would not let her off to a park by herself - she is too young to consistently be safe crossing the road - and too innocent to realise someone might be weird and inappropriate.

CagneyNYPD1 · 22/01/2025 21:30

Stick to your guns.

Last year of primary school is pretty standard. Unless it is a park directly opposite your house and you have a decent view of where he will be.

CombatBarbie · 22/01/2025 21:29

Completely depends on where you live?? How far is the park etc

WaitingForMojo · 22/01/2025 21:28

IMO it totally depends on where you live, and your individual child’s maturity. You know best.

Turbo4 · 22/01/2025 21:28

Definitely would be a no from me.

Bakedpotatoes · 22/01/2025 21:27

I wouldn't let my 8 year old go to the park on their own. They play outside the house but not to go off to the park out of sight.

MathsMagpie · 22/01/2025 21:25

My 2 8yos won't be going for a while

Dillydollydingdong · 22/01/2025 21:25

Did you go out with your mates to play when you were young? I bet you did. You've got to let him stretch his wings sometimes, and be with his friends.

falkandknife · 22/01/2025 21:24

I agree OP. You’ll get piled on and told you’re OTT and their kid was doing the weekly shop for the family at 7…. Good for them, but it’s your child so your rules.

bellsbuss · 22/01/2025 21:23

Too young for me , I've gone with last year of primary for going to the park with friends