Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My whole family forgot my birthday

394 replies

Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 14:31

Kind of light hearted but my brother, my parents and most importantly my DH have all forgotten to wish me happy birthday today. At time of writing it's 14.30.

Just to confirm my birthday is on the 22nd of January... I haven't got my dates mixed up and it's like the 21st today or something??

Also - any ideas on being petty? I feeling like letting them all know at this point needs something big so it doesn't look desperate for attention 🤣

OP posts:
Itstaxmonth · 22/01/2025 16:09

Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 15:58

Have you seen modern family! I was thinking of wating till 12am and sending a message saying 5,4,3,2,1 you forgot my birthday 😆😆

Show quote history

Yeah that’s probably better, more direct 😂

Itstaxmonth · 22/01/2025 16:08

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Not sure where you’re going with this but OP clearly stated at least twice that she mentioned her birthday to her husband yesterday.

ForGreyWasp · 22/01/2025 16:07

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Gettingbysomehow · 22/01/2025 16:07

Han86 · 22/01/2025 14:36

I never quite understand the birthday posts on MN.
Have you asked for any presents? Mentioned going out for a meal or doing something special for dinner?
If the answer is no and you were just waiting to see whether or not they remembered, then I feel you are partly to blame.

Rubbish, they should have the common decency to have this date on their calendars.
I'll bet OP doesnt forget her Hs or the kids birthdays.
In my family me DS and Dsis all have everyone's birthdays written down and we remind each other when one is coming up.
It's inconsiderate neglect and I would expect better.

Dramatic · 22/01/2025 16:06

Han86 · 22/01/2025 14:36

I never quite understand the birthday posts on MN.
Have you asked for any presents? Mentioned going out for a meal or doing something special for dinner?
If the answer is no and you were just waiting to see whether or not they remembered, then I feel you are partly to blame.

Oh howay man, are you saying when your kids are grown up they'll have to remind you of their birthday? Ridiculous post

Happy Birthday op 🎉🎂

ERthree · 22/01/2025 16:06

Hope your day gets better

Happy Birthday GIF by Lucas and Friends by RV AppStudios
Original poster
Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 16:06

SparklingSpa · 22/01/2025 16:04

You’re parents may message you soon as it’s still morning over there.

Very true! I guess I was more focusing on my DHs attempts 🫠

OP posts:
JandamiHash · 22/01/2025 16:06

It’s really shit when people forget your birthday but don’t you talk about your birthday in the run up with your DH? And what you’d like to do or receive?

Original poster
Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 16:05

gannett · 22/01/2025 16:02

The two things I always wonder about MN birthday posts are

  1. what is the norm - do all these people forget every year? Or is this a weird aberration? Because if it's the former, surely you'd have spoken up firmly about it before. If it's the latter... these things happen and it's forgivable. I forgot DP's birthday one year, and one year only (it was more that I got the current date wrong in my head so I didn't realise it was his birthday).

  2. have you not mentioned your upcoming birthday to them at all?

So it's not normal. It's my 29th and only my mother has forgotten my birthday once before (18th)

Yep I spoke with my DH yesterday about it. And the day before too I think...

OP posts:
SparklingSpa · 22/01/2025 16:04

You’re parents may message you soon as it’s still morning over there.

gannett · 22/01/2025 16:03

But yes even as a couple who are Not Into Birthdays and don't do big presents, DP and I say happy birthday to each other (if we've got the date right anyway). From the people you live with that should definitely be expected (unless you're one of those people who don't want it acknowledged at all).

Sunnyside4 · 22/01/2025 16:02

Happy Birthday OP. Hope you've got something nice into eat and drink tonight. If not, go and get yourself something or put in an order - you can have exactly what you want!

gannett · 22/01/2025 16:02

The two things I always wonder about MN birthday posts are

  1. what is the norm - do all these people forget every year? Or is this a weird aberration? Because if it's the former, surely you'd have spoken up firmly about it before. If it's the latter... these things happen and it's forgivable. I forgot DP's birthday one year, and one year only (it was more that I got the current date wrong in my head so I didn't realise it was his birthday).

  2. have you not mentioned your upcoming birthday to them at all?

DaisyChain505 · 22/01/2025 16:01

Han86 · 22/01/2025 14:36

I never quite understand the birthday posts on MN.
Have you asked for any presents? Mentioned going out for a meal or doing something special for dinner?
If the answer is no and you were just waiting to see whether or not they remembered, then I feel you are partly to blame.

This is ridiculous. Wishing someone (especially your partner) happy birthday isn’t something you should have to request.

Even if no presents are exchanged or there are no big plans made it is crazy to think that waking up and saying happy birthday to your partner is something that needs to be requested!

PuppyMonkey · 22/01/2025 16:01

So you had a conversation with your DH yesterday and discussed it being your birthday today and he still “forgot?” That’s weird. As is your mum forgetting your 18th TBF. Not Grin weird, more Hmm weird.

MassiveOvaryaction · 22/01/2025 16:01

Happy birthday @Oopsadaisy92 🎉🎈🎁🎂

Hope you have something lovely planned for yourself this evening. Any chance your dh will just show up to sweep you off your feet? Dh did that to me years ago (but he'd at least sent me a happy birthday text that morning too!).

ERthree · 22/01/2025 16:00

WeightLoss2025 · 22/01/2025 14:42

Ah, Happy Birthday OP x 🎂

What are you doing today? Any chance there'll be a little surprise later? Are they the type to pretend they forgot and surprise you?

Still no excuse for not even a happy birthday text or card. Excuses aren't good enough.

Drfosters · 22/01/2025 15:59

poppymango · 22/01/2025 15:54

This happened for my 18th birthday! I was trying to plan a night out and all my friends either said they couldn't come or cancelled the day before. I was heartbroken. I remember crying on my birthday and feeling really sorry for myself. Then of course in the evening came and there was a little surprise shindig. Which was lovely, but mostly I remember being sad all day in the lead up to it.

Show quote history

Yeah that is such a stupid thing for people to do. Let someone be miserable all day and then surprise them. The best thing to do is arrange for the person to be doing something small and then surprise them with the bigger thing.!
I feel bad for you that happened! Hope birthdays have improved since then!

Original poster
Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 15:58

Itstaxmonth · 22/01/2025 15:54

Also - any ideas on being petty? I feeling like letting them all know at this point needs something big so it doesn't look desperate for attention 🤣

Do you have a family WhatsApp group? Can you post a picture of you eating a slice of birthday cake in it tomorrow? 😂 or put it on your social media story with text saying something like “celebrating alone but at least there’s cake”

OR, I’d “forget” their birthdays next time 👀

Edited

Have you seen modern family! I was thinking of wating till 12am and sending a message saying 5,4,3,2,1 you forgot my birthday 😆😆

OP posts:
Isitasquid · 22/01/2025 15:58

🎂 🎂🎂

Timble · 22/01/2025 15:56

Han86 · 22/01/2025 14:36

I never quite understand the birthday posts on MN.
Have you asked for any presents? Mentioned going out for a meal or doing something special for dinner?
If the answer is no and you were just waiting to see whether or not they remembered, then I feel you are partly to blame.

That’s crazy! The people in your life you’re closest to should not need a reminder that it’s your birthday!

Original poster
Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 15:56

BitOutOfPractice · 22/01/2025 15:48

I would not be amused. Not by my parents and OH forgetting anyway. I’d be really hurt.

Show quote history

I'm probably masking dismay with amusement!

OP posts:
Wigtopia · 22/01/2025 15:55

Han86 · 22/01/2025 14:36

I never quite understand the birthday posts on MN.
Have you asked for any presents? Mentioned going out for a meal or doing something special for dinner?
If the answer is no and you were just waiting to see whether or not they remembered, then I feel you are partly to blame.

Ridiculous

Itstaxmonth · 22/01/2025 15:54

Also - any ideas on being petty? I feeling like letting them all know at this point needs something big so it doesn't look desperate for attention 🤣

Do you have a family WhatsApp group? Can you post a picture of you eating a slice of birthday cake in it tomorrow? 😂 or put it on your social media story with text saying something like “celebrating alone but at least there’s cake”

OR, I’d “forget” their birthdays next time 👀

Azaleahead · 22/01/2025 15:54

This happened to me last year. The teen DC forgot too…

Luckily I also found it more amusing than upsetting, and watching the penny drop for DH when I persisted in suggesting a meal out (he was initially getting a bit irritated with me as he’d promised to take DC to the gym) was brilliant 😂

We had a lovely evening in the end, I hope you do too!!