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My whole family forgot my birthday

394 replies

Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 14:31

Kind of light hearted but my brother, my parents and most importantly my DH have all forgotten to wish me happy birthday today. At time of writing it's 14.30.

Just to confirm my birthday is on the 22nd of January... I haven't got my dates mixed up and it's like the 21st today or something??

Also - any ideas on being petty? I feeling like letting them all know at this point needs something big so it doesn't look desperate for attention 🤣

OP posts:
Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 16:23

owlll · 22/01/2025 16:23

Sent a text at least!

Also my parents are retired in their 50s (fully cognitive)

OP posts:
owlll · 22/01/2025 16:23

housethatbuiltme · 22/01/2025 16:20

What are they meant to have done?

Its mid day on a Wednesday, are they not at work?

Surely if something happens it will happen later.

Sent a text at least!

Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 16:22

aperolspritzbasicbitch · 22/01/2025 16:21

Have you heard from your DH at all today?

I would be very upset if my DP forgot my birthday - last year he forgot Valentine's Day, which is the wankiest day of all days, but it still really upset me.

Happy birthday OP - treat yourself tonight.

Yeah! That's why I am amused. He asked after the dog and said good morning so he standard daily text x

OP posts:
coolkatt · 22/01/2025 16:21

I would get dolled up. As soon as hubby comes in if it's obv he has nothing planned in secret for you I would be off out. No teas made, nothing done for kids etc. I would be like I'm off out c yaz, , jump in the car and go take ur self somewhere for a bit just to make them stew. But go someplace so you're just not sitting in car stewing urself. Get to the pool, the pictures, go for something to eat. No shame in eating alone. There's no real excuse other than illness etc, to not remember. Not ur responsibility to leave hints etc. if u don't feel like doing this then u need to suck it but come anyone else's birthday I would be like no messages, no presents cards. And if anything said say oh I thot we weren't bothering this year seeing as no one bothered with me.

Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 16:21

Diomi · 22/01/2025 16:19

I agree with this. Why not discuss your birthday in advance? Then you don’t feel forgotten, your family don’t feel guilty and everyone is happy.

I did. I've been talking about it with them for the past could of weeks and spoke to DH yesterday

OP posts:
aperolspritzbasicbitch · 22/01/2025 16:21

Have you heard from your DH at all today?

I would be very upset if my DP forgot my birthday - last year he forgot Valentine's Day, which is the wankiest day of all days, but it still really upset me.

Happy birthday OP - treat yourself tonight.

B2B25 · 22/01/2025 16:20

housethatbuiltme · 22/01/2025 16:20

What are they meant to have done?

Its mid day on a Wednesday, are they not at work?

Surely if something happens it will happen later.

Nothing needs to happen in order to send some a message to say Happy birthday.. takes seconds.

Poor show from your parents and partner OP. I hope you spoil yourself somehow!

Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 16:20

Han86 · 22/01/2025 16:16

I guess your DH got distracted by working away to remember to message you. Hopefully he will remember later.

Knowing he would be away then I would have arranged something with friends (I don't know if you have children and that would have been possible)

Oh I agree. I have arranged things with friends for the weekend but a text wouldn't have gone a miss x

OP posts:
B2B25 · 22/01/2025 16:20

Happy Birthday! 🥳

housethatbuiltme · 22/01/2025 16:20

What are they meant to have done?

Its mid day on a Wednesday, are they not at work?

Surely if something happens it will happen later.

Diomi · 22/01/2025 16:19

Han86 · 22/01/2025 14:36

I never quite understand the birthday posts on MN.
Have you asked for any presents? Mentioned going out for a meal or doing something special for dinner?
If the answer is no and you were just waiting to see whether or not they remembered, then I feel you are partly to blame.

I agree with this. Why not discuss your birthday in advance? Then you don’t feel forgotten, your family don’t feel guilty and everyone is happy.

CharlieUniformNovemberTangoYankee · 22/01/2025 16:19

Happy birthday!
Just ask your husband if he's forgotten.

Who knows, he might have ordered a gift/flowers/whatever to be delivered today and he's in Bahrain wondering why you've not been in touch?

On the other hand, if he has actually forgotten - or worse, not bothered his arse - that really is pretty poor from him.

Han86 · 22/01/2025 16:16

I guess your DH got distracted by working away to remember to message you. Hopefully he will remember later.

Knowing he would be away then I would have arranged something with friends (I don't know if you have children and that would have been possible)

2025willbemytime · 22/01/2025 16:16

Sorry, I forgot to say happy birthday 🥳 🎂

Your h being away for work is no excuse. He could have left stuff or asked if you wanted to celebrate early or late.

OutrageousImmoral · 22/01/2025 16:14

Happy birthday 🎂🥂

Brooomhilda · 22/01/2025 16:14

I had an ex who once forgot my birthday. My birthday is also Valentine's Day and I didn't hear from him all day. Two weeks later her got my age wrong on a form, so clearly had completely forgotten (we'd been together 5 years...). It hurts but meh, you have to wonder why you're not important to these people...

Itstaxmonth · 22/01/2025 16:12

It’s so odd how some posters come on to threads like this tying themselves up in knots trying to think of ways to blame the OP for other people treating them poorly 😵‍💫

MassiveOvaryaction · 22/01/2025 16:11

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Wtf?!

I'll go with the Mumsnet standard "Are you on glue?" to this one!

ForGreyWasp · 22/01/2025 16:11

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ForGreyWasp · 22/01/2025 16:10

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2025willbemytime · 22/01/2025 16:10

VickyEadieofThigh · 22/01/2025 14:39

I always think that doing this - pretending to forget and then having a "surprise" later - is really mean. It can actually spoil a person's day.

My husband, on the 14th February, asked if we could do Valentines stuff after work. I said yes. Stupid idiot had forgotten so needed to buy more time. My birthday is days before, normally just gets both meals a couple of days before - 2 dine in for two at M&S - so not like he doesn't know after 25+ years.

This year I'll sort myself out for bday as I've divorced him

gannett · 22/01/2025 16:10

Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 16:05

So it's not normal. It's my 29th and only my mother has forgotten my birthday once before (18th)

Yep I spoke with my DH yesterday about it. And the day before too I think...

Your mum forgot your 18th? That's quite a birthday to forget.

I mean, if it's not a pattern of taking you for granted I wouldn't be mad. As I said I once forgot DP's birthday on account of not knowing what the date was. I don't think I could've told you what the date was before this thread, except "somewhere still in endless fucking January". Tell them mock-sternly and I hope they're mortified. And happy birthday!

AxolotlEars · 22/01/2025 16:09

Happy Birthday! 🎂

I always talk about everyone's birthdays in the rum up to them, including my own. I don't leave it to chance. I'm clear a out how I would like to celebrate.

Having said all that, at this stage, I'd probably plan to go out for a meal on my own or with a friend.

PuppyMonkey · 22/01/2025 16:09

@ForGreyWasp OP says she’s been talking to her DP about her birthday yesterday and probably before too.

Oopsadaisy92 · 22/01/2025 16:09

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Sorry but how would i have known?

I'm not indignant either - sorry if you read my message that way.

OP posts: