Made me feel uncomfortable should I make a complaint.

So disturbing. I hope you and DD are ok. You stopped it, so we'll done you. Kick up the biggest fuss until someone listens x

Ideally OP would have asked why at the time but even more ideally the doctor would have explained what the hell he was doing

I wouldn't just be making a complaint. I would be talking to the police!!!

Just to say as this a potential safeguarding concern I would recommend a bit more than just using the complaints procedure. There is a job in children's services called the Local Authority Designated Officer (LADO). Their job is to investigate professionals where there is concerning behaviour that is at a harmful or abusive level. They will make a plan and coordinate other agencies. A complaint could warn the person involved if they are spoken to. You can look these details up online if you Google children's services and your concern council name and LADO or ring the MASH team (multi agency safeguarding hub) that takes referrals. Unfortunately people are more likely to trust people in a position power and will agree with things they are actually not properly comfortable with. Try not to feel guilty and you are doing the right thing getting help now

Why do yo I think you might be unreasonable? He made you uncomfortable. Why do you think that isn't something to complain about?

Report to the GMC. It's the doctors and GPs independent regulator. They'll do a full investigation

If you read my comment I asked if he actually checked her genitalia or was it just the skin around it and her bottom!

There is a difference

Your instinct is 100% correct.
please report him!

Our surgery doesn’t ask as routine. There are notices up in the surgery saying that patients attending alone can request a chaperone if they want one.

Really? I've had moles removed and I've never had my genitalia checked!

Well done, amazing mum for stopping it and you definitely should take it up with the management. Too often we read stories of women going to a GP for cough or ear problems, who have been subjected to a vaginal exam!!!!! Loads of stories in the papers - and these are the ones who have reported it! What about loads more of those who are taught to worship the NHS and doctors and don't say a word? Needless to say, many people go to professions where they can have access to the vulnerable (and every patient is vulnerable, there is too much power imbalance) - doctors, teachers, priests, coaches, etc., to abuse the vulnerable. Well done mum!

But you're not a bad mum

You stopped him!

Was he trying to look at her genitals or the skin on her bottom and around her genitals perhaps for moles/ other beauty marks

If the OP was present, why didn’t she ask what he was doing and why ? I agree he should have explained himself in advance and been clear what was needed, but a simple ‘why are you doing that’ could have prevented the whole scenario.

In our surgery patients are advised that chaperones are available on request if the patient is attending alone, or they can have their own companion present. The child wasn’t attending alone. In this case OP was the chaperone.

A GP should STILL ask the mother if she would like a chaperone. That way, all parties have a witness if there are any questions, confusion, queries. My female GP asked if I’d like a chaperone when she checked me for breast lumps

@Rosscameasdoody

For reasons like this!!

Why do so many posters think a chaperone was necessary when OP herself was in the room the whole time ?

Opening himself up to what ? Why didn’t OP open her mouth and ask what he was doing and why at the time ? If OP was present with her child at the time of the examination then she is the chaperone. The child was not left alone with the doctor.

doctor here…

Firstly, I am so sorry you’ve both been through this. It is absolutely not a reflection on you as a mother so please do not think this.

was this NHS or private?
what specialty was this doctor - dermatologist/endocrinologist/urologist?

There’s many genetic syndromes that have ASD and skin conditions as part of them - in many of them the genitals are small/large/intersex. It isn’t part of most nurses scope of practice to check for these & nor are they trained to do so (unless they are advanced nurse practitioners). Full physical examination in such cases, as well as bloods are necessary to get to the correct underlying diagnosis.

BUT…for any kind of intimate examination of a patient of ANY age, the doctor should have asked first and offered a chaperone. This is in the GMC good practice guidance for ALL doctors.

You should put a complaint in or at the very least raise concerns. I suspect you were seen in a hospital outpatient setting - go via the PALs route as it is the most effective. It is highly unusual that no other staff were there.

my advice is - whenever you see a doctor - firstly check that they are a doctor, ask them their name, grade and specialty (tbh they should do this anyway). I never take offence at this and actually prefer it when patients double check for clarification.

This. In my GP surgery you are given the option of a member of staff as chaperone, or your own companion. OP was there to advocate for the child, so why do people think a chaperone was necessary as well ?

Why would you call the police ? He’s a doctor. The choice for chaperone is usually a member of staff or your own companion - the childs’ mother was there to advocate, so why the need for an extra chaperone ? As several people have said, cafe au lait marks on the skin and clusters in the groin area can be signs of other associated conditions. Why not ask a simple question - ‘why are you doing that’? And wait for the answer. The reason is likely totally legitimate but in this case done clumsily - but why jump straight to nonce ? I despair of the way this country is going. When we’ve rendered the medical profession scared to even look at us the wrong way we’re going to end up with sub standard healthcare. What then ? Sue for negligence when it’s our own paranoia that’s responsible?

I haven't been asked if I wanted a chaperone when my children have been with me. That's only when you are alone with the doctor.

You might like to read this:

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/neurofibromatosis-type-1/symptoms/

I had a lump on the top of my leg checked by a man at the hospital and a woman came and sat in.

What the fuck is this man doing opening himself up to this?

Certain birth marks can be associated with developmental disorders. I've just read a mum who was asked to note/detail any birth marks on her child for an autism assessment.
I assume these birth marks can be anywhere (my DD had birth marks on her lower back which are common in children of mixed heritage and go away by a certain age normally - which they have with her). They were only visible when her nappy was changed when she was a baby, and though they went away before she was potty trained, they would have been roughly under her pants when she was.
The doctor should have told you, and explained why.

Yes I agree the police need to be called. Even if what he did had a reason (it doesn't) he needed to explain what he was about to do.