DH cheated, I don’t believe his version of events

Oral is still sex! Who cares what orifice they were penetrating? It's sex and he cheated on.you and honestly if you forgive him this, he'll do it again.

I couldn't forgive it, personally. He'd be out that same day and I wouldn't be hiding the why.

I am sure this hurts like hell but it will get better. You are young and you can get back your life. You will be pleased you made this decision for you and your kid in years to come. This is entirely his doing , not your fault. Good luck.

Sorry OP, you must be devastated, this is a horrendous betrayal to discover.

Please don't give him the time of day to worm his way back even - before your last update, all the previous cheating revealed, you seemed unwilling to end the marriage because he seemed remorseful.
But those messages to his colleague/friend alone should demonstrate he was not remorseful in the slightest. Someone truly appalled at what they'd done wouldn't review the cheating so offhandedly to a friend. They'd be distraught.

What he was showing you was remorse at being caught, he was sorry for himself and the consequences.
A very different thing, but presents as real repentance (especially to women who don't like to see men cry, who don't really want the marriage to be over either).

Don't let him back.

Bloody hell. So sorry OP. He is awful.

Time to get organised for the sake of your DC. Don't tell him, just work out your rights and options. Get a STD check and see a solicitor ASAP.

Wishing you strength.

He cheated when your baby was 2/3 months old.

What the actual fuck is wrong with these men? They’re wired wrong.

Disgusting prick. Hugs OP. You are young, you can start over.

Please whatever you do, don’t listen to whatever he says next. He’ll blame drug or sex addiction. Claim he’ll seek help etc. Do not listen.

Sorry just read your update.

He sounds disgusting. Good riddance!

I hope you have some RL support

In my eyes he was cheating the moment he decided to go home with her. The intention was there, and regardless of what actually happened (he's obviously lying) he's cheated on you.
End it now, don't waste time and lose your self respect trying to overcome this.

Well done OP.

As an aside, you were "quite sure" he hadn't cheated before yet it turns out he has.

Never vouch for a man not cheating, especially if you weren't there.

Of course cheats lie through their teeth.

Oh wow...

You won't see it now, but to be late 20s, with a beautiful baby, yours lives ahead of you both...
You will come back from this. It's disappointing you will have to deal with this excuse for a man. But the sooner you disassociate with the man you thought you knew and accept the reality of who he is the sooner you can start to really live your life.

Hug your baby. You're going to be fine x

OP.... this work colleague now knows... do you think he hasn't told anyone? And it's speead thereafter to all and sundry. He has happily humiliated you publicly. These people will forever know your husband is a cheat and that you are putting up with it. You want to save the marriage because you love him??? No, you loved the non cheating husband. Bragging about it is horrific in my view. If he had ANY respect or love for you he would never have bragged about it. He's a pathetic, immature, cheating moron. PLEASE save yourself years of misery. Keep your self respect and get rid of this man child. And get checked for STIs. HE WILL DO THIS AGAIN.

Also the fact that he doesn’t really think he’s cheated ‘sort of’ means he isn’t remotely ready to take responsibility for his actions so the offer to attend counselling is an empty gesture.

I would run from this man. You thought your life was lovely. He has shown you the reality. If you leave now, it will hurt like hell but the rewards for you will be huge. You have a chance to build your self esteem, make a life on your own terms and happiness isn’t that far away;

I left a partner after cheating - we’d been together for longer that you have and it was a snog in a bar, nothing else; it took me about three months of living apart from him to see that I was a capable and awesome person who didn’t need him).

Had I stayed, I’d still be thinking about it all. Instead I love myself, my lovely DH knows how high the bar is and I feel secure in my relationship. And I know that if he ever did cheat, I’d be just fine without him (after the initial bit that you’re going though now).

So do you want to feel like this forever or move on and be happy? I’d start asking questions of yourself because whatever he has to say is irrelevant (and dishonest). Xx

So you would be ok with your partner having another dick in her mouth?

I'm so sorry you're going through this.
He is absolutely vile and unbelievably disrespectful to you.

You've done the right thing. I hope you have some real life support.

I feel quite devastated for you. This man is utter, utter filth. You have a little baby and he’s done this to you, over and over.

He is revolting. I am so sorry. Do nothing to protect him. Make sure people know what he’s done to you. And please look after your health with a STD check. I am so sorry.

Sorry OP. This has happened to two girlfriend of mine with their partners in Spain and Portugal. Obviously, the women in these stories are sex workers. Men won’t confess to that bit.

Just saw your update - well done, you have made the right decision. I’m so sorry that he is a serial cheater - but honestly better to have found out now when your child is still young and a the breakup won’t impact them in the same way.

What an awful betrayal of you both - keep strong, lean on your friends and family - and come back here any time you need to in the weeks and months ahead as you forge a new and better life for you and the baby.

Again, well done for being brave and meeting this head on - now get angry and get some good legal advice. And evidence so that he can’t backtrack when this starts going through the courts - take screenshots etc. so that you can divorce on the grounds of infidelity and get what you are entitled to financially.

Oh wow. I thought you were going to say he minimised it by saying they had a peck. He did all this whilst you were at home with the baby? He probably planned it. Are you sure it was definitely a work event? Either way he used it as an excuse to cheat. They probably did have sex and he's just trying to brush it off by saying she just gave him some oral sex, thinking it won't sound as bad. Kick him out!

So sorry OP. You've done the right thing.

OP, I feel gut punched just reading this. I’m not sure how you can stand it.

Oh love that's just awful. You're doing the right thing though and we're all here if you need a hand hold xxx

Oh OP. What an awful thing to have to deal with.

With kindness - even if he hasn't done it before, he could now do it again. You know he's capable.

You deserve better.

Omg! 😡😡😡😡😡😡

So he's been cheating the whole time! What a piece of shit!!! 🤢🤢🤢🤢 I'd get a STD check. What the fuck!

It you let him get away with it the first time, he will definitely do it again. If you must stay with him he needs to give you full access to his phone and not go away on weekends / holidays with work or the lads until the trust is built back up. Your relationship will be different now, I wouldn't hurry with a decision tbh, at least let him sweat a bit.

So sorry OP