Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

New neighbours cat

186 replies

butterflycatching · 21/01/2025 10:57

Not so much an AIBU, because I am not going to change my mind, but it has been playing on my mind for a few days now.

I moved into a new-build a few months ago. I was the first one to complete, and the development has been gradually filling up. I have the house on the end of the development and next to me is woodland.

New neighbours moved into the house next door last week and popped round- I thought to introduce themselves. But, they actually asked if before I let my dog out in the garden if I would check that their cat wasn't in my garden so it doesn't get hurt, and if I would consider removing the pyracantha (spiky plant) I have planted on the woods side fence so their cat can use that as access to the woods.

I told them no, I had planted that for security, but I would happily plant more along their fence side too if it will keep their cat away from my dog. I then got a whole explanation of they were hoping to encourage the cat to use my garden side towards the woods for roaming- rather than the other gardens which eventually lead up to the road. I was left thinking they thought I was very difficult.

I am not wrong in thinking this is bonkers and entitled? I can't be checking the whole garden for their cat every time I let the dog out. And you can't train a cat to roam in a particular direction anyway!!

OP posts:
Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 21/01/2025 11:09

My neighbours all have cats. I have a terrier. The cats still come into my garden but with one eye over their shoulder, and if they hear the door open they are sprinting up and over the wall as fast as their little furry legs will go. I love cats and I'd love to have one sit on my garden bench for a stroke, but my insane hunting-machine won't tolerate them. I don't 'check' before I open the door because the cat could be in the undergrowth, hidden behind something or in the shed, I'm not checking the entire garden before I release the hound!

heldinadream · 21/01/2025 11:08

Tell them yes you'll check the garden for the cat - and then don't bother. How will they know? Cat ain't gonna tell them. The cat will learn about the dog all by itself.
The plant stuff? Ignore.
They sound bonkers. And I prefer cats to dogs but if I had a cat I'd never, ever think anything to do with the cat's behaviour was anything I'd need to ask my neighbours to modify their gardens or their dog's actions for. My cat, my problem.

KhakiShaker · 21/01/2025 11:08

I have a cat and dog and these ppl are CF. I wouldn’t be checking my garden, it’s up to them to keep their cat safe.

SometimesCalmPerson · 21/01/2025 11:06

Well done for telling the cheeky fuckers no. Their cat can run back into their own garden if the dog goes out.

2dogsandabudgie · 21/01/2025 11:06

Just ignore them. I have dogs and a cat and the cat will soon learn not to go in your garden if you have a dog.

Curtainqueen · 21/01/2025 11:05

I certainly would not be messing about checking my garden every time I let the dog out. And removing plants in my garden so that their cat can use it for access is a big fat no. I would be accepting by now that there is never going to be a particularly great relationship with these people because their demands impinge upon other people and are not reasonable.

Nothingisrealisit · 21/01/2025 11:04

Absolutely ridiculous of them.
So cheeky.

Tessasanderson · 21/01/2025 11:03

PMSL. Our dogs will sit quietly at the patio doors waiting for any cats to come in unaware. Then when we open the door they shoot out all guns blazing. In a way we are doing all the local cats and their owners a favour. The cats know 100% not to come in our garden so they avoid it like the plague. The ones who forget soon learn. Bonus is we dont have cat shit in our garden ever.

Allthebrokenplaces · 21/01/2025 11:02

I'd check the garden quickly for a very short while just until the cat knows there's a dog living there. Cats are smart, if they don't like the dog, they'll stop visiting.

The rest of the stuff though? Not so much.

ThejoyofNC · 21/01/2025 11:01

How cheeky of them, to just assume their cat can go into your garden. Especially given you have a dog. I'd make your garden as unwelcoming to the cat as possible and I certainly wouldn't be checking for their cat before letting my dog out.

RomeoMcFlourish · 21/01/2025 11:00

They’re probably hoping that their cat will shit in your garden instead of theirs as well. I would ignore them, they sound ridiculous. It’s your garden, what you do with it is none of their business.