Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

New neighbours cat

186 replies

butterflycatching · 21/01/2025 10:57

Not so much an AIBU, because I am not going to change my mind, but it has been playing on my mind for a few days now.

I moved into a new-build a few months ago. I was the first one to complete, and the development has been gradually filling up. I have the house on the end of the development and next to me is woodland.

New neighbours moved into the house next door last week and popped round- I thought to introduce themselves. But, they actually asked if before I let my dog out in the garden if I would check that their cat wasn't in my garden so it doesn't get hurt, and if I would consider removing the pyracantha (spiky plant) I have planted on the woods side fence so their cat can use that as access to the woods.

I told them no, I had planted that for security, but I would happily plant more along their fence side too if it will keep their cat away from my dog. I then got a whole explanation of they were hoping to encourage the cat to use my garden side towards the woods for roaming- rather than the other gardens which eventually lead up to the road. I was left thinking they thought I was very difficult.

I am not wrong in thinking this is bonkers and entitled? I can't be checking the whole garden for their cat every time I let the dog out. And you can't train a cat to roam in a particular direction anyway!!

OP posts:
BMW6 · 22/01/2025 10:02

Lol not particularly young but totally clueless 😅
I'm sure in a few years they'll look back and turn inside out with Cringe

UndermyShoeJoe · 22/01/2025 09:55

Yanbu. They are crazy. First day and not a hi hello we are sally and Tom nice to meet you.

A can we have the wifi password, can you chop down bushes and can you make sure our cat isn’t in your garden but make sure it’s a safe cut though.

cheeky

Original poster
butterflycatching · 22/01/2025 09:30

cadburyegg · 21/01/2025 23:17

LOL! I have two cats and they figure out very quickly how to get around and what gardens to avoid. Your neighbours are bonkers

I think this is the issue though, they specifically didn't want their cat avoiding my garden, as when they had looked round they had identified it as the safe route. Now they've moved in its looking uninviting and they want that to change! They specifically want their cat to use it as a throughway.

Its why I wont be following one posters advice on here to give it safe high spaces. I don't want it feeling comfortable in that space and encouraging it to spend any time there.

OP posts:
cadburyegg · 21/01/2025 23:17

LOL! I have two cats and they figure out very quickly how to get around and what gardens to avoid. Your neighbours are bonkers

dentalflosser · 21/01/2025 23:14

It’s not fair for the neighbours to try and dictate to you how you should accommodate their cat. I know it is hard as you don’t want to fall out with them but the cat will walk along the top of the fence as they are such agile animals.
If you didn’t have a dog already would they expect you to check you can get a dog with them first?
No, no absolutely no! Your garden, your choice and they will have to live with it.

maudelovesharold · 21/01/2025 21:00

I’m a cat person, but your neighbours are the sort of people who give cat owners a bad name! Any cat will very soon work out which gardens to avoid, and how to get where they want to go! It probably will walk round the top of the fences to get to the woods. Don’t take any notice of the CFs.

Nameychangington · 21/01/2025 20:43

I am 100% mad cat lady, do not like dogs, and they ABVVVU (and batshit). Also there's a fair chance their cat might tease your dog by walking on the fence/walking around in your garden when dog can see it but not get out. Or just straight up chase your dog. So really you should be asking them to keep their uncontrolled unpredictable predator away from your trained pet's safe space/garden, if anything.

AlpacaMittens · 21/01/2025 20:26

butterflycatching · 21/01/2025 15:03

I think they are a bit entitled, they also asked if they could have my wifi password until theirs was installed, but I felt easier saying no to that one because work pay for it. The cat thing they wrapped up as an animal safety/welfare issue and kind of implied I was a dick for not being concerned if it got hurt.

Show quote history

Oh my god they're twats. This reminds me of when my neighbour had asked me for my WiFi password and I gave it to him like an idiot 😭 A month later he still hadn't sorted his own WiFi so I just changed the password.

Their cat's welfare is not your job! They need to make their own garden safe for their cat and that's their own job.

Honestly some people 🙄

CatsWhiskerz · 21/01/2025 17:34

Wow I've had cats all my life and never considered either neighbours dogs or making pathways as they usually decide where they want to go!
I think your last statement is true, they seem very controlling and you've set firm boundaries - keep it that way IMO
What dog do you have? Our dog is woofy and medium size and we no longer have cats in our garden, they usually stay well away now ... which my 3 cats like lol

HelplessSoul · 21/01/2025 17:20

butterflycatching · 21/01/2025 15:03

I think they are a bit entitled, they also asked if they could have my wifi password until theirs was installed, but I felt easier saying no to that one because work pay for it. The cat thing they wrapped up as an animal safety/welfare issue and kind of implied I was a dick for not being concerned if it got hurt.

Show quote history

They asked for your WiFi password?

My earlier post is now validated - they are CF CUNTS.

Bellyblueboy · 21/01/2025 17:08

I have a cat - they are bonkers.

I also have pyracantha in my garden by the fence - it doesn’t deter the cat from climbing the fence.

StrawberryTheCat · 21/01/2025 17:06

They asked for your WIFI password too???? OMG, just keep saying no until they hopefully never bother you again. They sound like absolute pains in the bum. Definitely not people you want to be doing favours for, they'll be take, take, take by the sounds of it!

Floralnomad · 21/01/2025 16:59

They are crackers , your garden so you plant whatever you want , your dog so he has free access to the garden .If they want to keep their cat safe they should cat proof their garden or get a catio .

DazzlingCuckoos · 21/01/2025 16:48

SprigatitoYouAndIKnow · 21/01/2025 16:25

Nah, release the hounds!

If the cat avoids the woods, you are probably saving the lives of countless small fluffy creatures that already live there. It will probably just go along the fence or through other gardens though.

This is a good point actually. Do the neighbours know that wildlife lives in the woods and there's a good chance that they'll be receiving a daily mouse gift??

Maybe dead, maybe alive, maybe left behind the toilet for a few days until you start to wonder where the awful smell is coming from... not speaking from experience at all, oh no...-

DazzlingCuckoos · 21/01/2025 16:46

CleverLemonCat · 21/01/2025 16:16

I have been known to put cat TV on you tube for mine! That's when she had to wear a cone and couldn't go outside! She is a bit addicted to it now though, must start monitoring her screen time.

OP, your new neighbours are nuts.

Show quote history

My cat spots the YouTube logo going on to our TV screen and is straight up on the TV unit waiting for her videos!

If we watch something that isn't a cat video she develops the patience of a saint and will sit there for absolutely ages!

I fear ours has an addition issue too!

SprigatitoYouAndIKnow · 21/01/2025 16:25

Nah, release the hounds!

If the cat avoids the woods, you are probably saving the lives of countless small fluffy creatures that already live there. It will probably just go along the fence or through other gardens though.

CleverLemonCat · 21/01/2025 16:16

RunningJo · 21/01/2025 15:23

They asked for your WiFi code!? Was it so the Cat could watch its favourite Tv show?
ffs

I’m glad you’ve been strong in saying no to these people, it would only get worse with what they asked for next!

I have been known to put cat TV on you tube for mine! That's when she had to wear a cone and couldn't go outside! She is a bit addicted to it now though, must start monitoring her screen time.

OP, your new neighbours are nuts.

guestusername · 21/01/2025 16:11

I’ve just moved to a new build with a cat and the bloody thing is making it all about her, demanding to go out day and night and giving me the cold shoulder if it’s dark out and I say no 🤣

Can you imagine the pre-completion convos these people have had with each other?

“What are we going to do about the cat? It will need sone time to adjust to its new surroundings and he/she would absolutely love those woods. I know, we will just ask the neighbours for a cat right of way, I’m sure it’ll be fine. Hope no one has got a dog, can you imagine the trauma all the barking would cause?”

Abso-fucking-lutely bonkers!

Edited to add … change your Wi-Fi name to fuckthefuckoff or mydogwouldeatyourcatasasnack or something 😆

Original poster
butterflycatching · 21/01/2025 16:09

BMW6 · 21/01/2025 16:01

Are they very young OP???

Late twenties with a 4 year old. First "owned" home, they were very excited to tell me that.

I think they are a bit mixed with overwhelmed by all the stuff THEY actually have to sort out after having a landlord or others do it for them, coupled with a bit of excitement that they can finally do their own thing... they might just need reminding they are in charge of their own home, not mine too!!

OP posts:
Mumofacertainage · 21/01/2025 16:02

They are nuts cats will just walk along fences and go where they want. My cat went next door and chased the dog, they thought it hilarious. We are all sane enough to know cats can look after themselves. I have lived for years with dos on both sides and at back. Cat just goes along fences to get to the fields.

BMW6 · 21/01/2025 16:01

Are they very young OP???

Glittertwins · 21/01/2025 15:52

I definitely wouldn't do it. Perhaps they should have done their homework a little better. Hope things do improve over time though and they turn out to be decent neighbours

ItGhoul · 21/01/2025 15:51

Your neighbours are being ridiculous and need to get a grip. Their cat, their problem. Of course you shouldn't be checking your garden every time you let your dog out. Madness.

This isn't the first time I've heard of cat owners making these sorts of requests though. Also SIL's next door neighbour had a go at her when she adopted a dog that didn't like children. The dog wasn't aggressive to children or anything, he just ignored them and gave them a wide berth. But apparently the neighbour considered it 'unkind' that my SIL had chosen a dog that didn't want to interact with her loud, excitable child through the fence, as if that should have been top of my SIL's requirements when adopting a dog for her own child-free household.

Original poster
butterflycatching · 21/01/2025 15:51

Glittertwins · 21/01/2025 15:43

They're shaping up to be hellish neighbours...who asks for a wifi code? Not exactly hard to get a bolt on from mobile phone provider or have they asked for your phone too??

.To be fair the mobile signal here is pretty poor and I think they said it was a 2 week lead time on broadband, but they are a family of three and I was worried they'd take all my bandwidth 😅

It was all part of the same conversation though, so hopefully now I've said no a few times they'll think I'm a miserable cow and leave me to it. They did strike me as quite comfortable asking for favours though!!

OP posts:
Discombobble · 21/01/2025 15:48

The cat and the dog will soon come to an accommodation if they are left to work it out themselves. And if the cat wants to go to the woods it will find a way, dog or not