Annoyed with DH over holiday!

What job does he do? Worst case could he work from home at the villa? Your kids are very small though which that much more tricky.

Quickest way to handle this…

Book the flights for you and DC and tell him he needs to sort the dates with work and his own flight, not that it’s an issue though as if he can’t sort it, that’ll give him two weeks to take in the school holidays to spend with his children!

No way would I be having him use it for going away to enjoy himself because he’ll think ‘ohh, that was a great result’ even if he didn’t plan it that way and then it’ll set a precedent.

if he doesn’t come make sure he takes those 2 weeks as time with the children so you can work or enjoy yourself!!!!

Call his bluff tell him your going to pay the rest of the holiday but you'll be staying at home with him as it was ment to be a family trip there's no point in going without him. See what he does everyone is entitled to holidays in all jobs. This just sounds strange to me why he hasn't put them in.

It sounds very much like it

I bet he think he’s being terribly clever as well & that you’d never realise that was his plan

This!

Exactly. Is this what he wanted all along? A quiet time at home while you and the children are away then two weeks on his own for his hobby holiday ?

OP has he sorted anything yet?

it’s a Saturday- ask is today when he wants to sit down and make a plan how you are going to deal with the holiday situation because he can’t keep ignoring it and hopes it goes away. He has to tell you what his plan is. When is he going to tell his sister?

so he’ll probably end up using his on a hobby trip

Convenient

Maybe that's what he's hoping for

Well wouldn't that be convenient for him?

No, nothing about this scenario is your fault. It's all on him.And resolving it? Also all on him.

I too am wondering why he's being so difficult about this, I do hope it's not going to be a case of him begging off the holiday, supposedly because he left it too late to book time off, and then you come back to find that he's actually left you and moved in with someone else, or has been off with another woman for a holiday while you've been away with the kids.

This!

He doesn’t want to go. He’s a feckless worm.

Tell him you want to cancel. Then move out .

So basically he's the one who works yet you've booked a holiday without knowing if he has those days off work?
This is a you problem

Why is he acting like a child who can’t ask a simple question, honestly we really need a new word for MEN these days because MEN they are bloody well not

I had a manager who made booking annual leave so stressful. I wonder if he's too embarrassed to tell you about that? Of course it could be he wants to have extra time to himself.

But the odds are we're all massively overthinking it and he's disorganised and doesn't like being called out on it.

Honestly op . Just book the flights and let him do what he wants . At least you have your plan.

offer to have the conversation he wants about it. Say you’re listening. Let him talk. Did he want to see if a) the villa booking can be moved (often possible for a small fee if it’s available a different date and if so b) talk to his sister quickly to see if they can do the revised date. Or does he want to lose the deposit and cancel? (Point out he would have to pay his sister back her share of the deposit, not just yours). Or does he want you to go with the kids alone? Or does he want to speak to his boss and see what can be done about those dates.

Which he can pay for. It sounds like finances are separate and the op can’t afford another holiday… but he can. Im not surprised- wants to plan it so he skips the family holiday and his partner does it all on her own with two young kids, gets mad at her for daring to ask when he’s booking the leave any responsible adult would already have booked, refuses to let her make plans that might make traveling slightly easier for a mum solo with two young kids, of course he also has lots more money too. Take a good long look at this man op, and start to think more about looking after yourself than him.

Smashing.. He can stay home and catch up on all DIY... And don't forget to change the WiFi password on your way out the door.... Phone off and enjoy your holiday..
Just tell sil the truth. Dh hadn't booked holidays at work. She can voice her displeasure also. At him.

What is he like generally and your relationship?

Could there be issues at work such as being on pip etc?

Is this his way of ensuring that you will drive there rather than fly.

Personally I would book flights for myself and the kids asap as the cost will only increase and let him sort himself out.

I think you need to lose your temper.

Sod that, he can use the leave he has left for parenting.

He thinks both his wife and his sister will just pick up the slack if he cba with his kids? Pig.

He needs to put on his big boy knickers and tellthe manager its booked and nonrefundable and his wife will divorce him if he doesnt go. Then explain what a twat he is and let the chips fall where they may...

I've managed Hundreds of people who have bookedtimeoff at inopportune moments. No one ever cancelled the team hust sucked ut up