Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I've got myself in a pickle for telling a lie

257 replies

mumspiration1997 · 20/01/2025 22:08

Ahh I've really got myself into a pickle.

A family member asked me the week before Christmas would I drop a gift into someone.

It would have taken me an hour and I genuinely was putting it off until I had time I even thought ill pop it in after Xmas (the recipient was on holidays so did not see the immediate rush)

I was transferred the £40 to buy the gift.

However when my family member asked me did I sent it in I said yes I did (and as I said fully intended to before the recipient returned home) and now someone (another family member) has checked for it while checking on the house and its not obviously there . I already said I dropped it off otherwise I could say ah it's still in my car.

Now they have just text saying.

"Hi tried to contact you. Either the gift wasn't there or it has been stolen I'd like to investigate this further. I'm down £40"

I'm so embarrassed! I didn't steal the money. Should I just say "I don't know what's happened I'm transferring you the money back" or fabricate some story about "Oh the neighbours cat took it"

I am NOT saying I didn't leave it in at this stage, I feel belittled enough.

Help!!!! I'll never fib again...but I'll also never take on anyone else's chores again!!!!!

OP posts:
fruitbrewhaha · 24/01/2025 12:12

mumspiration1997 · 20/01/2025 23:10

I think I'm just going to transfer the money back and say I'm not sure what's happened.

To be quite honest it's not about trust there's plenty of other people that could have been asked. I'm just too soft to say no...on top of all the other things I have to do.

Shit no! Don’t do this, you had some
good advice, buy the gift and take it around as planned. Just tell the person you have it but have delivered, sorry for confusion, was waiting for person to get home from trip.

In future don’t agree to be someone’s Father Christmas and elf.

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 24/01/2025 12:10

Not sure why the lazy arsed person asked you to get the Christmas gift if they were going there themselves?

ArabellaScott · 24/01/2025 12:09

southpawsofthenorth · 24/01/2025 11:33

OP abandoned this thread on page 2 having decided to give the money back so not sure what the subsequent 5 or 6 pages of “just drop it off, just drop it off” are about 😂

Well, in a meta sort of moment I'll have to come clean and admit that I didn't RTFT before replying.

I mean I meant to, then I hid my reply behind the sofa and discovered it by surprise.

Welshmonster · 24/01/2025 12:04

Just give the money back and they can sort out their own gift next time. It’s not your job and it sounds like they aren’t local. Or just buy Amazon gift cards and email it across

MsBouquet · 24/01/2025 11:45

southpawsofthenorth · 24/01/2025 11:33

OP abandoned this thread on page 2 having decided to give the money back so not sure what the subsequent 5 or 6 pages of “just drop it off, just drop it off” are about 😂

I was curious to see how long it would go on for, just in case it became a “cancel the cheque” moment 😅😂.

ArabellaScott · 24/01/2025 11:39

DaDaDoDaiDa · 20/01/2025 22:15

Don't tell more lies. Drop the gift round ASAP. Tell the truth - you intended to buy and drop the gift but hadn't got round to it, but you didn't want the giver to think you'd forgotten so you said it was done - it's with them now, you're sorry you unintentionally caused them to worry as that was what you'd been trying to avoid.

This is the only way to go, OP.

southpawsofthenorth · 24/01/2025 11:33

OP abandoned this thread on page 2 having decided to give the money back so not sure what the subsequent 5 or 6 pages of “just drop it off, just drop it off” are about 😂

PennyApril54 · 24/01/2025 11:32

I think just be honest , have you had a lot on your mind? Or been busy? Tired? Explain you haven't done it or if that's too awful say you've got mixed up with something else but will do it this week and then definitely do it.

Weefox · 24/01/2025 11:29

You're £40 in pocket and you've lied, ffs. No way out unless you want to make this mess worse.

SharpOpalNewt · 24/01/2025 11:13

A fairly minor thing this time, but take it as a lesson that it's better to just do something in the first place (or say you don't have time) than not do it, lie about it, then have to build a web of lies around it. Hope you manage to sort it out, OP.

Haditwithallofthisrubbish1 · 24/01/2025 11:13

mumspiration1997 · 20/01/2025 22:53

Thanks all! I know honestly I'm a disaster.

The person is getting home tomorrow so I was planning on going in to help them unpack and say hello. Bring milk etc so when I was there I was thinking of saying "I was just in welcoming DR home and went to put the suitcases out into the garage and there was the cases of wine" no wonder Jenny couldn't find it. Perhaps the cleaner set put of the way in order to do the floors or something. ???? Does this sound pathetic

No, don't do this. They will see straight through it. Just be honest that you intended to do it and you are sorry. Buy the gift and take it around.

Haditwithallofthisrubbish1 · 24/01/2025 11:10

nwsw · 20/01/2025 22:18

Buy it.

Message her back saying you totally forgot to drop it round. Which is true. But you had intended to before they returned. Which is true. And apologise for any unnecessary confusion or upset and for misleading. You just didn't want to make them feel let down.. but it's backfired and you are sorry!

All true.

This is perfect. Do this.

northernbeee · 24/01/2025 10:52

OMG I could have sworn I'd taken it but i've just found it in the boot of my car .... job done!

Goodtogossip · 22/01/2025 15:39

Blame your hubby. Say you gave it to him to drop off so thought it had been but when you've queried it with him he's said its in his car. Then go buy the gift & drop it off asap. Apologise for the misunderstanding & don't agree to do any favours again.

Speckly · 22/01/2025 10:30

mumspiration1997 · 20/01/2025 23:10

I think I'm just going to transfer the money back and say I'm not sure what's happened.

To be quite honest it's not about trust there's plenty of other people that could have been asked. I'm just too soft to say no...on top of all the other things I have to do.

Doing this just makes it sound like you were trying to steal their money. It won’t end nicely and everyone in the family will be told how you tried to rip them off 😳

Deeperthantheocean · 21/01/2025 19:00

We're all human and learn from these lessons. Take it round, apologise for thinking you had put it there but left in your car amongst a big pile of stuff or just come clean. Xx

MoonWoman69 · 21/01/2025 17:34

Saying that she thought she'd dropped it off already, but then found it in her boot, would only work if she was in and out of their house checking on it. If the gift is the only reason she was going, then that's not going to work!

iwillfghhjjj · 21/01/2025 17:28

I'd message "probably missed it. I'll check when I visit and report back if any issues. Don't worry "

GinAndJuice99 · 21/01/2025 16:58

'I'm down £40' is a very strange and suspicious way to relate to a member of your own family if you ask me

tobee · 21/01/2025 16:53

In my experience people who come up with a big convoluted excuse and rehearse it etc. find the people you tell don't really listen and they'll just want to be given the present/have the favour completed without fanfare or delay.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 21/01/2025 14:51

For another time though the better thing would have been to say “sorry I won’t have time to do that. You can send a present direct with Amazon - they even have a gift wrapping service!”

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 21/01/2025 14:50

Just drop it round now.

Then say “look I said I had to save you worrying because I was genuinely about to do it”

2025willbemytime · 21/01/2025 14:44

mumspiration1997 · 20/01/2025 22:53

Thanks all! I know honestly I'm a disaster.

The person is getting home tomorrow so I was planning on going in to help them unpack and say hello. Bring milk etc so when I was there I was thinking of saying "I was just in welcoming DR home and went to put the suitcases out into the garage and there was the cases of wine" no wonder Jenny couldn't find it. Perhaps the cleaner set put of the way in order to do the floors or something. ???? Does this sound pathetic

Yes. And you're implicating someone else in your stupidity and lie.

LostittoBostik · 21/01/2025 14:38

Intrigued about what you did in the end OP

Tillow4ever · 21/01/2025 13:27

Honestly, this is all very odd.

Why did they ask you to not only deliver a gift to someone that's an hour away (or 30 mins if the hour was there and back) but to buy the gift as well? Why didn't they either do it themselves, find a closer person to do it or order it to be delivered directly?

Why didn't you buy the gift once you had the money? It sounds like you were hoping the sender would forget and the recipient would never know they were supposed to receive something! It might not be that, but it is certainly how it looks - especially with lying about delivering it. They might even ask you for the receipt for the item if they think it's been stolen, so you will be caught out further then.

You absolutely should have said no when asked - it might have deem different from we're going there anyway.

All you can do now is tell the truth - you were so busy over Xmas you said you had delivered it because you fully intended to in time for them getting home, and you didn't want them to worry.

When exactly did you plan on buying the gift given they were arriving home today? Why were you planning to go over to help them with their suitcases etc?

It all just sounds so odd - like you either never intended to do it, and now you are panicking. Or that you are the world's flakiest person and shouldn't be trusted with things.

Swipe left for the next trending thread