Ex kicking off over present

I once bought a pair of size five football boots from a teenager in one of my classes who had grown out of them. For a birthday gift though I think nicer to get new if you can.

Our club have a boot library, they take boots in good condition and give out to other kids.

Boots are expensive and sometimes the kids might only get 2 months out of them

I don't care if anyone does it it's is grime. You saying even wealthy people do it like it makes it any less gross, it is still gross

Was the child pleased with them until the ex started grumbling about them?

If they're popular/coveted brands I suggest you get yourself to Vinted!

Depends on your definition of 'used', age of the child, level of play in rugby and what your budget is.

I buy DS second hand rugby/football boots but they usually still come with the box, no marks or signs of wear and mainly only worn a handful of times (you can tell from the inside sole if they were well worn or barely worn)

Younger children grow out of sizes quicker (I think we got 4ish months out of one size of rugby boots) than older children. Same for if its just one day a week or multiply days they are being use. My DS only has rugby one day a week - one week is a match week the next is training.

I can not afford to buy my DS new boots for rugby and football every time they outgrow the last ones. Itrs expensive and there is a massive market for second hand rugby/football boots, esp the branded ones.

I gift my children second hand gifts all the time esp as they are both under 8 years old. 99% of the time you can not tell they are second hand items and they really don't care. They see me purchasing things (rarely albeit) for myself second hand (vinted/ebay/charity shops) so it's not something they see as 'low' as some PP have said. My children are grateful they have the items they want (branded boots) than something they don't like (sports shop generic version)

I live in a very naice area, million pound plus houses, most kids in private schools, fancy cars and holidays, designer handbags etc and our local football and rugby clubs all have boot banks where you swap outgrown sports shoes for the next size up. Everyone does it. My kids are currently wearing at least third hand boots and they're completely fine. We can absolutely afford new but for something that's worn for, at most, a hour twice a week for six months or so it would be incredibly wasteful to buy brand new each time.

All the people clutching their noses are clearly not rugby players ! It's very normal to have second hand kids boots in most clubs I've come across!

I would never give a child secondhand footwear. Footwear molds to the wearer's feet and may not give optimal support to the second wearer.

This.

Fine to have 2nd hand day to day, but for me, birthday/Christmas presents should be new, unless people aren't in a position to do that.

I work 2 jobs. Go ahead tho, cry about privilege

I would happily take good condition second hand boots from someone I know just as shoes that are needed, but buying them from someone random and giving as a birthday gift - no. The mum hasn’t handled it well but honestly, I’d be appalled in her position too.

Exactly! I can work all the overtime I like, I won't get paid for it! Oh if only life was that easy.

People need to check their privilege.

No it's not.

There's a big market for this type of thing.

You do know that not all jobs are paid by the hour? Paid overtime is not always a option.

Dad can pick up overtime to get a nicer gift. Used boots as a gift is lame af

How nice it must be to be so priviledged

Second hand shoes are tricky because they mould to feet very quickly and unles sthey have only been worn for a matter of hours they could be very uncomfortable, I gave and recieved many clothes from/to friends and family but never shoes apart from once when DS wore an expensive pair of trainers for a few hours and then announced they were too tight!
As a birthday gift I would not be impressed AT ALL though

I think how she handled it was out of order. but I wouldnt be happy with my children being gifted second hand shoes or trainers - it could mess up the way they walk/run in them because the shoes have been worn in.

Second hand shoes for a birthday present would probably be disappointing. What else did he get him?

Buying second hand is fine , but for birthday presents most people would expect to get something new.

It's not buying used boots thats a problem. He was fine to buy his son used boots.

The problem was buying used boots and giving them as a birthday gift.😟

Out of interest, what was the difference, price wise?

We all have nearly everything second hand, asked my 11yo if he wanted new or used rugby boots (Christmas present) and he said used, able to get a better brand that way and they’re going to look exactly the same after one game whatever we do. It’s not like new ones would last more than a season anyway!

importantly, his Mum is definitely the villain here for suggesting second hand means less love. She’s hurting her son, no matter her feelings about the gift.

Used boots as a gift
Wow...that's low