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Original poster

To think there’s techniques nursery could do to prevent hitting

32 replies

Drearycommuter · 17/01/2025 20:40

Hi, my DD 3 keeps getting hit by a boy in her nursery. been ongoing maybe 2 or 3 months. With his hand and also with toys. She told me and nursery also keep me informed about it.

but nursery don’t seem to be able to do anything about it. I actually get the sense they want him to leave although they haven’t said that.

Aibu to expect them to have some tricks to better manage this apart from stopping him when he does it and then shrugging their shoulders?

I don’t want her to be hit, and I also don’t want to remove her because that seems unfair on her. And I also feel for him and would hate him to get kicked out because he’s only 3 too. Not sure what to do.

OP posts:
Bloodybrambles · 17/01/2025 21:31

Tell her to hit him back.

she has every right to protect herself. He’ll then find some other kid to do it to.

1AngelicFruitCake · 17/01/2025 21:23

Mrsttcno1 · 17/01/2025 21:06

I don’t really think there’s much you can do. It’s developmentally normal for that age, the ratios don’t accommodate 121 supervision, and he won’t be the only child hitting either so as long as the nursery are aware and keeping at it the best they can, that’s all you can ask.

Even if you chose to swap nurseries, it could well happen again, as I say it’s a totally normal developmental thing for the age, unless you chose a solo childminder or one who only has older kids.

I disagree actually. By now a 3 year old shouldn't be hitting, an occasional hit I can understand, but not repeatedly hitting others.

Your child has the right to be safe and secure at Nursery. I'd ask the nursery what their plan is and how to do their absolute best to ensure your daughter is kept from being hurt.

ChestnutGrove · 17/01/2025 21:13

If they had a travel cot or play pen they could instantly put him in it for a couple of minutes when he did it. He'd still be able to see people so it's not cruel, it would just let him see he gets no attention for it and is removed from the fun. It might not be fashionable but doesn't mean it's wrong. Current methods will go out of fashion too in time. It worked for my dd 20 years ago. She could always see us.

Mrsttcno1 · 17/01/2025 21:06

I don’t really think there’s much you can do. It’s developmentally normal for that age, the ratios don’t accommodate 121 supervision, and he won’t be the only child hitting either so as long as the nursery are aware and keeping at it the best they can, that’s all you can ask.

Even if you chose to swap nurseries, it could well happen again, as I say it’s a totally normal developmental thing for the age, unless you chose a solo childminder or one who only has older kids.

Original poster
Drearycommuter · 17/01/2025 21:03

That’s a good point.

im planning on hoping it improves but amightly worried that it won’t change and not sure I’m doing her a good service by taking her there every day.

but hate the thought of removing her - she has lots of lovely friends there, it is part of a carefully planned life as a single working parent with her sister in school next door.

what would others do?

OP posts:
Whatabouthow · 17/01/2025 20:59

Given that my toddler used to manage to get the occasional hit in with my other child and I was only watching them, I suspect they are managing to stop him from hitting a lot. You'll obviously only hear about the times they don't manage.

Mrsttcno1 · 17/01/2025 20:48

I think it’s a hard one for the nursery to deal with really because while I totally agree there are ways and strategies for trying to avoid this, those tricks really would require 121 supervision for the child and typically nurseries have a 1 adult to 8 kids ratio for 3 year+ kids so it becomes much more tricky to implement and keep on top of because they simply don’t have the staff to dedicate 1 person solely to his care.

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