Needing to make up work hours - should I leave?

Bank shifts and pick up the ones you can do (assuming care work).

It would only be if they're off while poorly. Also, it depends how they are when poorly. DD just slept most of the time , so I slept with her.

Or can you have set days? Like Friday and Saturday night, then your DH would be around during the day to make sure you get some sleep.

Your DC are only young for a very short amount of time, lots of people have career breaks for many reasons. I was made redundant whilst on maternity leave and whilst we thought it would be a disaster, it did give me the chance to spend more time with my DC and I now look back and am so grateful I did.

Oh, OP. That all sounds so hard on you and your DH.

There are a lot of factors to consider. Can your family do without your wage for a while? Can you manage emotionally without working for a while? Will you find it hard to restart your career if you take some time out? Are you entitled to any unpaid parental leave, and if so how would your job react if you took it? Could you do freelance work, or sign up to do occasional agency work, where you’d be able to accept work only when it’s convenient?

It sounds to me as though you need to sit down and work out the pros and cons of giving up work for a limited time. Research what benefits you’d be entitled to. Look into alternative work options which are more flexible. Get as much information as you can, so that you can balance up the financial, emotional, and practical costs and benefits as comprehensively as possible.

If you decide that it’s feasible to stop for a while, talk to your employer. Explain the situation, tell them that you hate letting them down but also can’t leave your kids when they’re very sick, so you feel that sadly you will need to offer your resignation. They may accept happily. But they may also be able to offer some kind of compromise when they’re faced with losing you altogether.

I hope you’ll be able to find your way to a better setup, because it all sounds really stressful for you at the moment.

It’s tough when your do are little. Surely the initial period of picking up every bug going should pass soon? It’s flu and norovirus season too but that will pass soon.

Im in healthcare and did weekend nights when my dc were little, only moving to weekday nights when my youngest went to preschool.

Not going to lie, it was really tough but it meant we had no childcare costs. I only moved to days when my youngest ds was 12.

If you enjoy the job, try and give it a bit longer and see if things settle.

If by not working you aren't taking a financial hot and you can easily pick up your career it may be worth it for a few years.

However taking time off work for dependents is usually and employers may be difficult about it but they know it happens. They should have a policy about it - some give a few emergency paid days a year and others are unpaid. I've never heard of a job asking you to make up the hours - but then again I work education so it's not like a I can do much about it as school hours are set!

The first thing I would do is ask HR for a copy of the absense policy and see what it says compared to what is being asked of you.

Decide from there.

If you’re seeing lithe financial gain for doing this job it’s not worth it, maybe looks for something more flexible? X

Well if you can’t do the job then your options seem limited . If you are a nurse or HCA could you not just do a couple of night shifts a week instead , that’s what I did when my children were children .