To feel justified getting a taxi back from the shops sometimes -DH seems IABU

He doesn't get to tell you how to get about. Particularly if he's not prepared to go out and do the shopping himself.

What a strange and obscure notion that anyone would think you'd had your license taken away. Nobody in their right minds (or even not in their right minds) would look at someone getting a taxi and assume they'd lost their license, not for a single second. Do they also think the same thing about people on buses or trains?

I find this really strange that you’re this worried about this - and particularly that you’re worried others will think you’ve had a licence taken away if you get a taxi 🤷‍♀️😳 No one is going to give it any thought whatsoever. At all. You’re massively overthinking this.

Do you and your dh have your own spending money? Dh and I pool all our income - he works, I don’t, but we give ourselves the same and set amount of spending money into our own bank accounts to spend as we wish. If you could do this he literally has no say / knowledge of what you do with your money.

Taking a taxi is not a treat and you don't need to justify it either.

The money that comes into your household is yours to spend too is it not?

You say you love your husband very much, does he love you as much? I ask because if he does and he cares about your health and welfare he wouldn't even blink an eye at you using a taxi.

My husband would be suggesting/insisting I got a taxi back in your circumstances, my health and comfort would be the priority not the cost of the taxi.

This!

I can’t believe he expects you to lug heavy items home on the bus with the excuse that he’s crap at DIY!

You take a taxi home after the shopping or your dh does the shopping on a set schedule and including the heavy items. His choice. He can let you know this evening what he prefers.

I used to live in Greater Manchester and found the public transport awful, takes forever to get literally anywhere from the suburbs which doesn't help, but there was about one bus every half hour. I live in a city with amazing public transport now.

I do my shopping online though as my pain won't tolerate standing in queues too long.

Of course you can get a taxi!
Would also suggest a shopping caddy - we have had several folding ones like this - works really well for heavy groceries etc and you can put it on the bus too. Have been using them for years - not just for grannies!
https://www.staples.co.uk/cleaning-janitorial-products/housekeeping/utility-trolleys-and-trolleys/black-folding-trolley-crate-0402012/?agp=1&dip=659950&gad_source=1&gbraid=0AAAAAD-3WuPyxsYNadazny11JKSAtWxa2&gclid=CjwKCAiAnKi8BhB0EiwA58DA4Thb1RJQKmjwIT8VhVRpJucSVznpqWftYOlJYMLewjJ-ZUj7uN-97hoCdsIQAvD_BwE

I am not much younger than you and manage to carry shopping home on the bus fine (heavy items get delivered). Is there a specific cause of your hip and shoulder pain (like arthritis?) or do you need to do some physio/strengthening exercise?

Anyway YANBU to get a cab back with heavy items, pain or not.

YANBU. Tell him if he’s so bloody bothered he can do it next time.

As an aside our local service (Arriva) won’t accept people bringing paint or some other DIY goods on the bus. There was a poster up about it a while ago on the buses. So even if you could manage it they may refuse you.

A half decent man would help his wife carry the load especially if she was in pain

He is a tight miser

I bet he has a massive savings pot too?

YANBU. Your DH is. Get the taxi. If he doesn’t like that then he’d better hurry up and learn to drive before the shame consumes him. I don’t drive either. Too anxious. I’d be a danger on the roads. DH drives and will drive me if possible otherwise I use taxis/Ubers if needed. Bus to shops and taxi home sounds like a great plan.

As a fellow chronic pain sufferer I say get the taxi!

But also maybe consider a shopping trolley. I have one that looks a lot like a small suitcase and it's great.

During the last few years, I'm finding it harder physically to get about as soon as I have a few bags of shopping I would usually manage on the bus. I'm not especially large - a size 14 though approaching 50

OP! You’re in your 40s! The way you wrote I thought you’d say you were in retirement!

Aside from the very strange (to me) lack of driving in any part of your family, you’re free to do as you want. Lugging paint on a bus sounds totally frigging awful, so I don’t blame you for getting a cab.

I know you love him, but your husband sounds like a lazy, controlling tightwad to me. 😬

He has a choice between coming with you and carrying all the stuff home on the bus himself, and agreeing that using a taxi is a sensible option.

We did the exercise some PP suggested - we estimated how much it would cost us to own and run a car, it's quite a lot. So we decided to put half the amount to a virtual taxi&rental cars pot, use car as a service as much as we need and re-evaluate if we spend It.
Few years later, we still aren't close to that.

I echo everyone else. He either does the heavy lifting or shuts the fuck up.

Tell your husband he either shuts his cake hole or he takes over the shopping completely.

You don't need to justify fuck all to him. The cheek!

Your an adult you don't need to justify yourself to anyone

"AIBU to 'treat' myself on occasion to this, or is DH right it's too much? Is he afraid I will be judged getting into a cab and people will suspect I must be getting into a cab because I've had a licence taken away? I've never been able to drive due to a sight restriction, but DH has never been inspired to learn. We are entering our 50's now so that is unlikely to change."

If he doesn't shop or help you to do it he doesn't get ANY say on how its done....and I'd expect more than washing up from him if you are the DIY-er. Provided you aren't struggling financlally and genuinely do have to watch the pennies (been there earlier in my life) then its up to you entirely on how you manage. If he whinges again tell him to STFU.

I love cabs but DH loves them more.
We can't drive. Don't need to drive and tbh learning and insuring now would be very expensive. It's better for the environment and even getting a couple weekly would be cheaper than running a car for us.

Some places a car is absolutely necessary but i think it would be great to get out of the car ownership mindset in places where it isn't - that said the only way that could happen is with reliable, affordable public transport and that we most certainly don't have.

Definitely get a cab back! Not sure if this has been mentioned but have you thought of getting a shopping trolley? Life changing! Not just for old ladies you know (I’m 48 and love mine)

Much easier and quicker to just tell him to shove it up his hole. 🤷‍♀️

You are over estimating how much other people think. I see people getting into cabs with shopping all the time and I don’t think about them at all. Not even a little bit. Total non event.

Could you present a comparison of the amount it would cost to get someone in to do the work Vs cost of you doing it including materials, bus fare and taxi home?

I grew up believing taxis were a ridiculous luxury used only by the weak, but had a lightbulb moment when waiting to get on a bus with 4 small children, shopping and a pushchair that sometimes they are the most sensible choice! If he doesn’t want to come with you and do the heavy lifting, he doesn’t have any say in how you get it home