To wonder why women 65+ are all determined that coffee should be mouthscaldingly hot

I am 72. I have stopped buying coffee in cafes because it is always luke warm - I buy a cold drink instead.

MIL (in her late 80s) was here at Christmas and for her second coffee requested that it be hot.

I was a bit confused as it had come fresh from the machine and just had milk added - so a perfectly normal temperature for coffee imo.

This is my mum! Although she was like it long before she was 65. Everywhere we went, she would ask for hot milk in her coffee.

However, too hot drinks can cause oesophageal cancer so it's better to get used to having them a bit cooler.

If I made someone a cuppa and their response was to rudely snap, "Too cold, bring another" they'd be making their own tea from that day forward!

Love those! I don’t have gas in my current flat but when I had a gas cooker I used to use them. My Hungarian flatmate from years ago introduced me to it.

The mcdonalds scalding case was 30 years ago, it's not like someone in their 60s has spent their whole lives on scalding coffee.

I also don't know anyone of that age who's spent their whole lives drinking instant coffee. People 65+ have been just as much a part of the fancy coffee revolution as people under 65. Its not like they've been excluded from society for 40 years

People on these threads act like anyone 60+ has been in their 80s forever.

I feel customer service can be so poor in the UK. No one needs to be rude if they feel their hot drink is too cold, but at the same it shouldn’t be a problem for a customer to politely point out it’s too cold for them. We are all different.

In a friends house or at a work event I’d just suck it up if I was served lukewarm coffee of course, but if I’m paying £3-4 for a coffee or tea I will either say something or just not come back to that cafe again.

My dad was like this with food and hot drinks. It had to be scalding. I think it was connected to his Parkinson's and/or early dementia.

To be fair she did describe their behaviour as “not normal” and “ludicrous” - that’s fairly critical.

I think I will become this person! But that's because I actually prefer hot food, and now it never happens because there's an inevitable 10-minute delay before everyone is at the table (potty, simply not listening quickly enough, need to wash their hands, anything) and also the food temperature is made to suit the kids not scalding themselves.

So I think once I have a bit more freedom again, I shall thoroughly enjoy having hot food and the time to let it cool down just a little and still enjoy it hot.

Hopefully before the age of 65 though!

Huh?

I'm 64 and love my coffee hot but not so hot I burn my tongue and mouth.

What on earth has age got to do with a coffee heat preferences?

Yeah I was more thinking of tea in that scenario. I don’t need black coffee to be piping hot and often use a work or home coffee machine , but strangely enough if it’s a drink with milk in it I do need it to be super hot. Hence I’m not keen on the lukewarm lattes from Starbucks 😆

I'm also baffled by how this is ageist.

If someone is saying, "all older people are awful because they like piping hot drinks", sure. But it's surely harmless for the OP to observe that all the older women she knows like hot drinks very hot?

As OP says, other generational behavioural observations are available. I took am a millennial who hates answering the phone!

In fact, I work in a company which skews much older than average, and there're a lot of comments about the fact that we "young'uns" (I'm 36!) don't like calls. It's not ageist, it's observational unless it's critical.

I am 52. I like my coffee to be served to me hot enough that I can nurse the cup for a few minutes before I can take a sip. It is comforting. I also want it served hot enough that I don't have to down it in a matter of seconds to actually have a hot drink.

It is not about being over 65. It is about personal preference. Where that personal preference originates from is a separate discussion.

Moving on to tea, I grew up in a house with hard water and a mother who never descaled her kettle. To this day, I cannot finish a cup of tea. I will always leave the last 0.5cm or so, in case I get a mouthful of chalk. Even if I 100% know it isn't there because I made it. That last bit makes me gag. Everything has an explanation somewhere, even if it is not apparent to an observer.

There may be something that a larger proportion of people over 65 have experienced that have led to the perception that they 'all' like scalding coffee. But it won't be all by any means.

A lot of the automated barista coffee machines have a pre set temperature for the different types of coffees. How do I know this? I have just spent 2 hours trying to work out how to raise the temperature on my new machine from tepid to hot 😂.

Maybe if multiple people are telling you your coffee is cold it's just cold?

Steaks “shouldn’t” be cooked well done either, but even though it’s not the optimum way to honour and serve the meal, restaurants usually offer the option to the customer who has their own personal preferences.

This is the same thing. Offering an “extra hot for heathens” option would seem a sensible approach.

Oh jeez @Whotenanny be careful who you talk to about the onion coffee. The old women will hunt you down and cancel you 😆

Where's the point of a hot drink if it isn't hot?

Coffee shouldn't be scalding hot. It should be hot, but it should not burn your mouth. It absolutely should not be lukewarm, either.

Milk-based coffee absolutely should not be scalding hot. It burns the coffee and the milk.

I own a coffee roasting business, so I know my onions 😉

The tea was probably cold and stewed by the time the servant had traipsed with it all the way from the kitchen to the drawing room in their stately home.

I came to write the same and it was always the way for me.
That’s why I was volunteering for tea/ coffee duties at the family gatherings since the age of 18-20.

I did actually go to a fancy coffee shop and was served coffee lukewarm. I couldnt drink it and asked for it to be heated up and the guy who owned the shop was furious. His face went bright red. I actually said, this coffee is cold.
I think I need therapy.

I'm 48 and can only drive it if it's scalding. Ahead of my time clearly!

I make my coffee in a stove top espresso pot. It is absolutely steaming and all the better for it.