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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To deliberately inconvenience my colleagues?

164 replies

MistletoeMoments · 16/01/2025 20:13

I spent a big chunk of last year covering a colleagues sick leave. I was going to be the least inconvenienced by it, so agreed to do it. It was supposed to only be for a couple of weeks, but he ended up being off for 7 months!

I was exhausted by the end of it, as I was juggling my own work, and it also involved a change in hours (earlier start).

Anyway, he came back and things went back to normal.

He's now scheduled to be off for a long weekend tomorrow, and I'm 99% certain nobody has arranged cover for it. I suspect it's just assumed I'll be doing it.

WIBU to just go in at my normal time tomorrow ready for my working day? It means my nightshift colleague will need to stay behind for 1hr until I come in. He'll get paid for it, but I feel a bit bad because I used to work nights too and I know how tired he will be!

OP posts:
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IAm16StoneHalloween2024 · 22/01/2025 10:10

Plumedenom · 22/01/2025 09:47

Really hope you didn't go in early. Please let us know how it played out.

OP updated on the 17th at 8.14am.

Plumedenom · 22/01/2025 09:47

Really hope you didn't go in early. Please let us know how it played out.

SweetnsourNZ · 22/01/2025 06:50

Just do your regular hours. If management haven't spoken to you maybe they have already arranged cover with someone else if not, that is their fault. No one should assume you can just come in earlier just because you have before, what if your circumstances have changed?

MumsTheWordYouKnow · 21/01/2025 21:34

Botanybaby · 21/01/2025 21:26

You sound vile

How dare a man's illness inconvenience you and how dare his annual leave make your life hard It's not him or the night shift worker who needs to cover leave it's the managers and if you are eagerly waiting for the fall out then you are clearly not a very nice person. This could have been resolved if you just asked prior to the event

I’d have to say you sound vile. It’s a line manager’s responsibility to sort this out, not a colleague, unless they have a reciprocal agreement. Even then that shouldn’t involve the OP changing their hours unless paid more. The OP only received a bonus. This is unacceptable actually.

MumsTheWordYouKnow · 21/01/2025 21:30

As you haven’t been asked by your line manager to do anything different surely you just continue on. Covering a long term sickness is very different to covering a short holiday.

Botanybaby · 21/01/2025 21:26

You sound vile

How dare a man's illness inconvenience you and how dare his annual leave make your life hard It's not him or the night shift worker who needs to cover leave it's the managers and if you are eagerly waiting for the fall out then you are clearly not a very nice person. This could have been resolved if you just asked prior to the event

Hotflushesandchilblains · 21/01/2025 21:19

Something like this has happened to me twice in my work life. The first time I went to my manager and asked them what, of my usual duties, they wanted me to drop so that I could cover the extra duties. I politely but firmly kept reiterating that it was not possible to do everything asked and I needed their direction, or I would be making my own choices about what did not get done.

The second time, i was assigned to cover an extra geographic patch. I kept pointing out that this was supposed to be temporary but no move was made to recruit to it. A lateral move came up which they could not really refuse me, as part of trying to keep me in my original job they offered to sort the patch issue. I told them they had had 2 years to sort it, had kept ignoring my requests and that I was no longer confident in their promises.

Fraaances · 18/01/2025 12:55

Ah yes - I’m sorry. Totally wrong thread.

angela1952 · 18/01/2025 11:29

MistletoeMoments · 17/01/2025 09:23

Please tell us you were paid extra for covering your absent colleague for 7 months.

No, I wasn't! It wasn't an issue at first, but as the months started ticking by, I raised it with my manager and requested an additional payment. He said he would look into it. Heard nothing for weeks before I arranged a meeting with my HR Manager who told me I "wasn't entitled to any additional payments".

I was offered TOIL for any extra hours worked.

I covered for four colleages for months, two long-term sick (one was simply malingering), one had left and one had actually died. The policy was not to recruit immediately to save money and it tended to take at least three months to replace people who were definitely not coming back.
After six months I was given a bonus (£1200 taxable) for my trouble, not even a push up the pay scale which would have helped my pension. I left shortly afterwards and my replacement stayed about six months, worn out by the constant dreary expectations of management.

TreacleTarcleSparkle · 18/01/2025 09:57

Op I don’t have any advice but you sound like a truly selfless person and a gem of a work employee with how you think of others when you nowadays don’t always get this in a sometimes ‘dog eat dog’ world.

OP - are you simply worried about not being your usual overly helping self to others? If so try not to be! If the person you’re worried about being tired if they’ve gone out of their way for you then I understand why you would want to go in earlier but do they reciprocate back to you?

ASimpleLampoon · 18/01/2025 06:13

@MistletoeMoments I just want to add my voice to those saying think of yourself and stop rescuing the situation. Take your leave, don't cover others any more.

OP, do you work in Care by any chance ?

RawBloomers · 18/01/2025 01:54

Fraaances · 18/01/2025 00:16

When you find out someone has used your milk for cereal, send them an invoice for £2. Every time. Also CC your manager and let them know that this is theft.

Edited

Wrong thread?

Fraaances · 18/01/2025 00:16

When you find out someone has used your milk for cereal, send them an invoice for £2. Every time. Also CC your manager and let them know that this is theft.

Laurmolonlabe · 17/01/2025 23:39

You need to talk to your line manager- don't just assume, be proactive, and make your disquiet known.
You seem to be martyring yourself, it's not up to you alone to provide cover-if there is a situation and you realise, tell your manager, help them to do their job rather than trying to do everyone's job yourself.

Deeperthantheocean · 17/01/2025 22:52

MistletoeMoments · 16/01/2025 20:37

Nobody has asked me, and I deliberately haven't offered.

In that case they will have it covered. The cover you did was I assume part of a rota but it's not now. Xx

mdinbc · 17/01/2025 21:33

Mistletoe, I'm so glad you stuck to your schedule, and showed management the gap. Please arrange for your 1st of 10 weeks immediately/ I would plan one a month.

Pieandchips999 · 17/01/2025 21:20

Well I'm glad you didn't go in early. Now they have learned that they can't just treat you like a dogsbody. And your assumption about them defaulting to you without the respect to ask was accurate. I'm not entirely convinced you are getting those 10 weeks though. They might say there's a maximum toil entitlement or you should have used it by x date. I would take it quickly. They need to learn they can't take the pee with you as they learned so far that they can

MusicMakesItAllBetter · 17/01/2025 21:04

MistletoeMoments · 16/01/2025 20:13

I spent a big chunk of last year covering a colleagues sick leave. I was going to be the least inconvenienced by it, so agreed to do it. It was supposed to only be for a couple of weeks, but he ended up being off for 7 months!

I was exhausted by the end of it, as I was juggling my own work, and it also involved a change in hours (earlier start).

Anyway, he came back and things went back to normal.

He's now scheduled to be off for a long weekend tomorrow, and I'm 99% certain nobody has arranged cover for it. I suspect it's just assumed I'll be doing it.

WIBU to just go in at my normal time tomorrow ready for my working day? It means my nightshift colleague will need to stay behind for 1hr until I come in. He'll get paid for it, but I feel a bit bad because I used to work nights too and I know how tired he will be!

If you haven't been asked to cover for this occasion, then turn up at your usual time

Knowitall69 · 17/01/2025 20:19

MistletoeMoments · 16/01/2025 20:47

It's more a moral dilemma. I'm 99% sure there's no cover in place so my colleagues are going to be inconvenienced by having to stay late.

Not my responsibility, but there's nothing really stopping me from coming in early just in case.

You do know you REALLY need a break, don't you?

category12 · 17/01/2025 20:13

MistletoeMoments · 17/01/2025 10:10

At the moment I facilitate it myself by picking quieter weeks, and delegating some of the urgent tasks to various managers and colleagues. It takes about a lot of planning sometimes just to allow me a week off!

This thread has empowered me to say I no longer care how it's facilitated. I'm entitled to those 10 weeks off so I'm going to take them, whether it causes hassle or not. Smile

My manager certainly never has any issues taking leave!

I find it hard to believe any business can facilitate that amount of leave. It's ludicrous. They need to pay you.

allmymonkeys · 17/01/2025 20:04

Holy mackerel, lady.

You are being TOTALLY unreasonable in describing your idea of working your contracted hours as "deliberately inconveniencing" your colleague. Is it your job to arrange cover? Is it reasonable for you to anticipate being taken for granted? No. Neither applies. If nobody has had the basic courtesy to ask you if you would be so kind as to cover yet again for pi55-taker then don't you DARE blame yourself for declining to solve their problem unasked.

fetchacloth · 17/01/2025 18:16

YABU - speak to your manager and get him/her to sort it out.
You're not doing yourself any favours doing unpaid overtime covering other colleagues, let the management sort it out, that's what they're paid for.

BurntBroccoli · 17/01/2025 17:37

You definitely need to take those weeks off! I would take them in nice blocks of a month at a time.
I'm not sure how much you earn but by doing a lot of extra hours and them not paying you, could put you under NMW which is of course illegal.

Pumpkinpie1 · 17/01/2025 16:03

Well done OP for stopping enabling poor planning.
Managers are paid to manage . This hasn’t happened. Hopefully now by sticking to your guns they will now plan absences properly.

WeCanOnlyDoOurBest · 17/01/2025 15:56

Do you work in a care home by any chance? It’s the only role I can think of which would be so slap dash about staffing and time off. Regardless, well done for standing your ground, there’s a distinct lack of respect for you and if you don’t make a stand this won’t change.
On a final note, if you are not a member of a Union I would strongly suggest that you address that, you might need one. If you have issues in future, regardless of what they are, ensure you keep a diary of dates, times, names, who said what etc, because in my experience when co workers don’t get their own way they pull rank.