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Original poster

Financial abuse?

112 replies

Clmt · 15/01/2025 18:16

Long story short, my sons dad told me he wont be paying for him anymore and will not be having him overnight one night every weekend, because I simply asked him to have him on the weekend he was due to have him? (He said I misunderstood, although I have texts that show we both understood the schedule).

He has been on a 'career break' for 7 months, since I filed for CMS (our son is 8 months old) and has got money (I worked in HR at our company so I know exactly how much money he took home each month. Before the left he took home £75k in one month in commission).

I filed for court because he can't stick to a schedule and financially abuses me.

What do you make of these messages and what do you suggest I do?

My maternity pay ends next month and benefits won't cover me. I'm looking for work but as of yet haven't had any luck.

OP posts:
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redstroll · 15/01/2025 18:40

Mrsttcno1 · 15/01/2025 18:38

If he’s not working then you’re going to get nothing via CMS and you cannot force him to work, you also can’t force him to have the child at all overnight or otherwise and no court will force him.

it would appear he gave £500 for Jan

Mrsttcno1 · 15/01/2025 18:38

If he’s not working then you’re going to get nothing via CMS and you cannot force him to work, you also can’t force him to have the child at all overnight or otherwise and no court will force him.

redstroll · 15/01/2025 18:38

he gave £500 for Jan?

redstroll · 15/01/2025 18:36

Are you happy leaving such a young baby with such a stupid man?

Hollietree · 15/01/2025 18:36

Also FYI you missed one of the mentions of your child’s name. You might want to blur it out like the others.

Hollietree · 15/01/2025 18:35

Your messages are very aggressive, like a dog with a bone. If I was in the receiving end of messages like that I would be pulling my hair out at the thought of dealing with you.

I know you are looking out for your child, trying to make ends meet, and I’m sure he’s been a twat who is not stepping up for his child. So I totally understand your frustration.

But I would suggest calming down your messages, be amicable for the best interest of your child. He is more likely to step up financially and be a better Father to your child if you can be pleasant. Bite your tongue and play nice.

Original poster
Clmt · 15/01/2025 18:28

OP - other messages

Financial abuse?
Financial abuse?
OP posts:
Original poster
Clmt · 15/01/2025 18:28

OP - see messages

Financial abuse?
Financial abuse?
Financial abuse?
Financial abuse?
Financial abuse?
OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 15/01/2025 18:25

What do you mean you filed for court?

If he’s not working he can be made to pay and he equally can’t be made to see his son. He sounds like a massive shit but he can wash his hands and walk away, happens all the time.

Have you applied for universal credit?

devastatedagain · 15/01/2025 18:19

As pp said you can't force him to see your son and you cant force him to work

To be fair, would you want someone like that to be in your sons life anyway? Your son has got you. Thats all he needs.

coralsky · 15/01/2025 18:19

Were you married ?
Unfortunately you can't force him to work.
Will he run out of money eventually and have to go back to work ?
I'd be making sure everyone knows what a lazy responsibility-shirking prick/ terrible dad he is.

Springflowersmakeforbetterhours · 15/01/2025 18:17

He is a work shy useless df.... You can't make him work (and therefore pay cms) or have your dc at all. No judge can do that either...