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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if your wedding day was as perfect as you intended?

34 replies

Yoursfaithfully · 14/01/2025 22:31

I was reading a post on here earlier, about a wedding day where some guests cancelled at the last minute. It got me thinking about my own wedding and the drama that unfurled as the day went on. DId your day go as planned or did you have a few curved balls to deal with as well? It seems so much time and effort goes towards creating the 'perfect' day, I just wonder if anyone ever actually achieves it!

My hiccups:

I got married on the day of Princess Diana's funeral and one of my guests got up halfway through our vows and walked out of the church never to be seen again. I heard later that him and his wife just felt it too hypocritical to be part of a celebration when the rest of the nation was united in mourning, and on reflection they were surprised that we still went ahead with our wedding on the same day. Err, it had been planned about 18 months previously, what were we supposed to do? The vicar did ask for our guests to partake in a minute's silence before the service started so that everyone could acknowledge the event and then move on without it casting a shadow on the rest of the service. It seems that wasn't enough for our two runaways though! AIBU to think if they felt that strongly about it, they should have just not turned up at all?

It didn't stop there...our reception was held at a hotel just a matter of minutes away from Great Brington (the neighbouring village to Althorp) and was descended upon by a host of journalists and press who were reporting on the wedding, while they awaited the arrival of Diana's procession at Althorp House. We had chosen a buffet-style meal for the wedding breakfast, with hot and cold options ranging from a couple of whole poached salmons to beef Wellington and all manner of lovely things in between. However, when we arrived at the hotel from the church, my parents were taken to one side by a petrified-looking manager who had to impart the information that most of our buffet had....gone. Literally gone, as in gobbled up by the hungry journalists, gone. Apparently, when they saw the food being set out in a room near to the one they had been allocated to put their cameras, kit etc in., they assumed it had been laid on in their honour and dug in. It was pretty horrendous, they managed to devour both the salmons, all the beef Wellingtons, most of the cold meats and half the salads before they were spotted and stopped. I honestly can't remember what the hotel managed to cobble together for us, but I do know we weren't charged for any of the food that day, and the evening buffet had obscene amounts of food thrown at it. I don't think I've ever seen so many chicken drumsticks!

Luckily, everyone saw the funny side of it and it was certainly a talking point for a good while afterwards. It didn't spoil the day one jot, as my lovely late Mum said at the time "It's food, not blood". There was plenty to drink, great music for dancing and everyone had a good time celebrating with us. And almost 28 years later, we STILL laugh over it. Although I can't help but think that if such a bodge-up was to happen in today's 'where there's blame, there's a claim' culture, that far more would have been made of it....compensation bayed for, newspapers hunted down and sued, the Daily Mail called in perhaps?

OP posts:
Yoursfaithfully · 14/01/2025 22:58

Well, that was its own f-up in my original post! I've just noticed I've stated 'wedding' when it should clearly have said 'funeral' (and too late to edit):

...and was descended upon by a host of journalists and press who were reporting on the wedding funeral....

OP posts:
Iwantmybed · 14/01/2025 22:56

Yes, lovely simple low key beach wedding on a tropical island at sunset with our families.

The day itself was undramatic but our suitcases got lost on the way to the wedding with all our wedding clothes and rings in. We had to wear our plane clothes for a few days, thankfully the cases arrived in time. The day before our wedding we both got stung by a jellyfish 🪼 in the sea, sting marks on our arms on the wedding pictures.

AnneLovesGilbert · 14/01/2025 22:50

You’ve got a great story 😂

I’ve had two weddings.

The second was utterly perfect. Wouldn’t have changed a single thing. Completely uneventful, only 12 of us, the sun shone, I felt a million dollars in my £40 dress, DH was radiant, and I couldn’t tell you what we ate but the cake I made was amazing.

KnickerlessParsons · 14/01/2025 22:49

Our wedding day was far from perfect, and that's how I wanted it. It's the mistakes and funny misunderstandings etc that we talk about 30 years on, not the perfect bits.

Nogaxeh · 14/01/2025 22:48

I was mostly glad to get through the day without anything going horrendously wrong and being excruciatingly embarrassed.

I really don't do well in front of large groups of people, or being the centre of attention, so hopefully my wedding was a perfect day for plenty of other people. I did enjoy my mother's and Granddad's speeches though. They were both good with an audience.

TetHouse · 14/01/2025 22:45

The vanished buffet is hilarious!

I had no ambitions for anything like a perfect day — we were very low-key, I wore jeans and an old coat, we had two friends as witnesses, and went out for a fancy lunch afterwards. I think the only photograph is of us in a black cab on the way to the restaurant. It was lovely, though!

Ihatelittlefriendsusan · 14/01/2025 22:43

Honestly, ours was amazing. Thebonky thing that would have made it better would have been if I could have avoided having my sibling there without causing ww3.

The resounding comments from guests was that you could feel the love throughout the whole day...not sure I could have asked for more.

Pippa12 · 14/01/2025 22:41

Bloody hell- the journalists eat your buffet!!! That’s horrendous OP.

We married abroad. Sadly my DH Aunt unexpectedly passed away the day before our wedding, meaning his Uncle needed to fly back home as she hadn’t come due to other commitments. We spent alot of time the day before booking his flights, transfers, assistance at airport etc.

The day itself was wonderful but with an undercurrent of sadness due to the bereavement. My DH uncle was adamant we should all have a bloody good knees up in his Aunt’s name and that we did.

DaftyLass · 14/01/2025 22:38

Our was a lovely, wonderful, crazy, slightly dramatic event.
One the one hand, 120 guests, horse and carriage, all our loved ones, beautiful meal, and a tremendous party
On the other, accidentally forgot part of my wedding dress back home (2 h round trip) found out my dress was see through at the actual church, part of the wedding party got into a fight during the night resulting in a hole in the wall at the venue, two couples split up, one got together (and are now married) one child conceived (not mine) and ending up spending my wedding night sleeping in a hay loft of an active barn.
Woke up in a pile of straw , listening to goats, cows, horses pigs and chickens down below us!

What a night!