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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask how you've reached a high salary? 50k+

290 replies

Redvelvetdreams1 · 14/01/2025 19:03

I'm on 29.5k which is the most I've ever earned in my life, and I'm 34. I have a degree and a PGCE but here we are.
I'm never going to be a millionaire, but I just don't feel like I'll ever know what it's like to be well off. I live alone too but fortunately only have myself to support.

I'm an EO in the Civil service, which i hate. I'm not trying to be rich, but I'd just love to have a comfortable salary and be able to save comfortably, go on proper holidays and not just a £19.99 ryanair flight (I know I'm lucky to even do that) afford to learn to drive, and just know what it's like to not have to check my bank account daily and count every penny.

However I know this is the reality for most people. Maybe I can go back to teaching and try to make it up to SLT, but school behaviour is horrendous these days which is why I left.

I'm just feeling a bit lost. I know I'm lucky to even have a job, but without sounding arrogant I considered myself as intelligent, I gained qualifications, can speak other languages and a lot of people my age are earning quite a bit more than me.
Just interested to hear anyone's stories and any advice on where to go from here.

OP posts:
Casualbrowser21 · 15/01/2025 01:09

overthinkersanonnymus · 14/01/2025 21:31

@Casualbrowser21 please can you tell me a bit more about how you got in to this role? Im a mortgage advisor at the moment (self employed) and looking for a change!

I started off in consulting and then internalised at an investment bank - I work with people from all different career backgrounds though (definitely don’t need a finance degree). I would look up any business change manager, PMO, strategy roles if PowerPoints are your thing! Ha. Hours tend to be 8am-6pm - happy to answer any questions you have :)

Taxbreaks · 15/01/2025 00:13

shuggles · 14/01/2025 22:54

@Redvelvetdreams1 The answer is nepotism and cronyism. If you have friends, then you will be directed towards jobs that pay high salaries and you will be treated favourably in interviews.

I will get a bunch of responses to this comment with people sobbing and saying "no! I worked hard." Well, I worked hard too. I guarantee that I've worked harder than almost everyone on this thread. I don't have friends, so I never socialise, and I never took part in the drinking culture. My weekends since my early 20s have been dominated by working and studying. But because I'm not in a friendship circle, that means I have an extremely high rejection rate from interviews (statistically, more than 19 out of 20 interviews are rejects for me) which is why I work in a job with a relatively modest salary (given my qualifications and achievements).

You know that moment when your boss mentions something novel that nobody else is keen on picking up?
That's when to ask what's in it for you.

Sadly, if your workrate vastly exceeds that of your colleagues it is likely to be considered unbelievable by interviewers.
Additionally, some useless managers believe that lightning doesn't strike twice - so a £2m unexpected profit may even lead to redundancy.
Apply for a job paying twice your salary and see what happens - you literally have nothing to lose.

ShakespeareInTurmoil · 15/01/2025 00:06

I’m 37 and on about 60k if you include my 10pc annual bonus and I’ve done it by jumping around. I started low, very low, in 2011 on 14.5k as a junior. I stayed there two years, next place six years, the next three years, then a couple of short jobs (one wrong move, one temp contract) and now my current job.

I left jobs I liked and that were comfortable with great colleagues because I was focussed on what I wanted to earn. I always had aims - 25k by 25, 30k by 30. Then it was 50k by 35. My current aim is 70k by 40.

I made a disastrous mistake with one job which was a big jump in salary but that I hated and left after four months. I then had to take a temp position which paid less than I had earned in the job I’d left for the disastrous one. It worked out in the end but stressful at the time.

To earn better money you have to take risks and push out of the comfort zones. I’ve now reached a salary that I’m comfortable with and have a job I like, so I’m not planning any more moves. I am looking to climb within this time.

Crazybaby123 · 14/01/2025 23:56

EndlessTreadmill · 14/01/2025 22:25

Actually, if it sounds plausible, they don't verify.
It only happened to me once, when they asked to see previous pay checks.
But earlier in my career I was actually advised to this by a headhunter: I had been in the same company for a number years and been promoted internally and was woefully underpaid, to the point where it didn't seem credible that I had all the responsibility I did for my pay. Headhunter basically told me to add on about £20k to my figure when I was talking about it to other companies, and I did. And since it was what the market rate was, nobody questioned it.

I agree, noone has ever verified my salary...

Crazybaby123 · 14/01/2025 23:55

Rosebeds · 14/01/2025 23:42

I started my own antiques dealing business aged 22 and now aged 28 I make 55K average. So self employed.

Oh you are living my actual dream, I would love to do this :) amazing :))

Rosebeds · 14/01/2025 23:42

I started my own antiques dealing business aged 22 and now aged 28 I make 55K average. So self employed.

iamnotalemon · 14/01/2025 23:17

yeshimabet · 14/01/2025 22:59

I'm in admin for a west end firm. £60k then £20k bonus plus shares.

Recruitment agencies are - good start.

But I'd do private tutoring to supplement your income. Look into the overseas market: a mate earns packets doing evening work teaching English to Japanese students on zoom.

Wow!

shuggles · 14/01/2025 23:05

@Durhamgirlie Well you certainly don’t sound like a good team player!

I am. I will work all hours to get things done if it means helping others in the team. Most people who claim they work hard pack up their stuff at 6pm and refuse to work any more. Not me.

Not sure I’d hire you either if this was your tone in an interview!

It isn't.

yeshimabet · 14/01/2025 22:59

I'm in admin for a west end firm. £60k then £20k bonus plus shares.

Recruitment agencies are - good start.

But I'd do private tutoring to supplement your income. Look into the overseas market: a mate earns packets doing evening work teaching English to Japanese students on zoom.

Durhamgirlie · 14/01/2025 22:59

shuggles · 14/01/2025 22:54

@Redvelvetdreams1 The answer is nepotism and cronyism. If you have friends, then you will be directed towards jobs that pay high salaries and you will be treated favourably in interviews.

I will get a bunch of responses to this comment with people sobbing and saying "no! I worked hard." Well, I worked hard too. I guarantee that I've worked harder than almost everyone on this thread. I don't have friends, so I never socialise, and I never took part in the drinking culture. My weekends since my early 20s have been dominated by working and studying. But because I'm not in a friendship circle, that means I have an extremely high rejection rate from interviews (statistically, more than 19 out of 20 interviews are rejects for me) which is why I work in a job with a relatively modest salary (given my qualifications and achievements).

Well you certainly don’t sound like a good team player! Not sure I’d hire you either if this was your tone in an interview!

Fourleggedfanatic · 14/01/2025 22:55

Private tutoring alongside existing job. Takes a while to build up and get a reliable client base but worth the time and effort. Started my business alongside a teaching job and it’s my full time job now.

user1492757084 · 14/01/2025 22:54

Stay, find enjoyable roles and work yourself up in the Civil Service.
In ten years you will be doing better. Two months is not a very long trial.

shuggles · 14/01/2025 22:54

@Redvelvetdreams1 The answer is nepotism and cronyism. If you have friends, then you will be directed towards jobs that pay high salaries and you will be treated favourably in interviews.

I will get a bunch of responses to this comment with people sobbing and saying "no! I worked hard." Well, I worked hard too. I guarantee that I've worked harder than almost everyone on this thread. I don't have friends, so I never socialise, and I never took part in the drinking culture. My weekends since my early 20s have been dominated by working and studying. But because I'm not in a friendship circle, that means I have an extremely high rejection rate from interviews (statistically, more than 19 out of 20 interviews are rejects for me) which is why I work in a job with a relatively modest salary (given my qualifications and achievements).

RockOrAHardplace · 14/01/2025 22:54

Jotim02 · 14/01/2025 19:10

@Zanatdy how do you earn £67k as grade 7, that's usually grade 6, what department are you in? @Redvelvetdreams1 don't give up, there's are lots of opportunities in the CS, Take advantage of free training, apply by for apprenticeships, be strategic about where you want to get to and speak to those who have got there. Join a network, volunteer, ask your boss for development opportunities

I'm also a G7 in the Home Office and I'm on £63K but I do not get London weighting. I know each government dept pays differently, my job in the MOJ would pay several thousands less as would the DWP. But a 6 in my dept would get at least £12Kpa more than me.

Gabitule · 14/01/2025 22:52

It could be worse. I am in my 40s and I work for a charity in a senior role. I earn less than £50k and can’t progress any further (other than becoming ceo, which I don’t want). My job can’t be replicated in the private sector. I love the job but hate the money, and even more so when reading how much other people earn :(.

Maraudingmarauders · 14/01/2025 22:47

I’ve just reached 50k+ at 35. Never thought I’d get here!
I have a BA from a RG in a humanities subject and an MSc from a RG in the heritage sector. I worked in catering/retail for about 6 years post university, each time beginning at the bottom as a trainee and becoming a manager through promotions. I then saw a team leader role which was a pay cut in a university sector role and I took it to get a m-f job as I was sick of weekends. Worked that for a few years. At this point I’d never topped 30k and was 30. Then the manager position of the building I worked in became available and I stuck my neck out and got it - picked over one of my bosses who also went for the job. My previous management experience had paid off despite being a totally different sector. I’ve done that for a few years and with pay rises and yearly increments just tipped over 50k. I’ve now been offered a secondment in a different department which will be 55ish when I start and closer to 60by the time it finishes.

what I’d say is I know it can feel totally hopeless, but don’t be afraid to put yourself forward. The times I’ve made a leap is when I’ve stuck my neck out. Gain skills, even if you don’t think they’re particularly relevant. I can drive a forklift, and have a list of qualifications I never thought I’d have. Continuous professional and personal development because you never know which string on your bow might come in useful. And sometimes you need to take a step back to go forward. By going back to the start at times, I showed I was willing to put in the graft.

Durhamgirlie · 14/01/2025 22:47

I’m roughly the same age as you and earn £50k.

I basically just worked my way up the career ladder by doing as many courses/exams as I could and applying for promotions/moving jobs every few years but I always stayed in the same field and have become more experienced over time.

Deciding to switch careers it’s a slight setback as you’re starting at the bottom of the ladder again but don’t get disheartened. There aren’t really any shortcuts just keep working hard and you’ll get there eventually.

don’t give up x

emsyj37 · 14/01/2025 22:42

Taxbreaks · 14/01/2025 22:40

I've heard complaints that FCDO won't let people change roles if they've been in their current post for less than two years - not sure if that's still the case.

OP isn't at FCDO, it's HMRC. It is not possible to block moves on promotion. It is sometimes possible to block a level move, but is not common or standard. If she applied for a HO post and was successful, her manager would have no power to stop her from moving to the higher grade role.

ManyMaybes · 14/01/2025 22:42

My first job out of uni was an EO in a Whitehall department on £25k back in 2013. I have a maths degree but bungled applications to banking etc and this CS role was not relevant to my degree and skills. I found the CS to be very unambitious and frustrating so I used my CS experience and maths background to blag my way into tech consulting in the public sector. I then transitioned into consulting in the finance sector and now I work for a fintech company on a little over £100k.

I think I have been underpaid for my entire career compared to my peers, which I used to find very frustrating. I still think I am underpaid because I look at salaries for the same role in the US and they are 3 times as much at least. It’s outrageous how little people get paid in the UK, and so often the culture here is to moan at the apparent entitlement of people expecting to earn more. We need to want and demand more!

I could move in the UK and get paid a fair amount more now, but my job has good flexibility, I enjoy it and I’m planning on having kids soon anyway so it works well for me for now.

Taxbreaks · 14/01/2025 22:40

Blarn · 14/01/2025 22:35

I'm an EO but after 3 months in the role I applied for a HEO expression of interest and now have 9 months working at HEO together me into permanent promotions. Definitely worth looking at what your department has. But yes, moving around a lot is still the best way to progress in the Civil Service.

I've heard complaints that FCDO won't let people change roles if they've been in their current post for less than two years - not sure if that's still the case.

Pink39tree · 14/01/2025 22:39

Plastictrees · 14/01/2025 22:27

That’s great for you. Lots of companies absolutely will verify this, usually via reference. I think advising the OP to add 20k onto her existing salary in the hope that no one will notice she’s lying is unwise.

Especially unwise unwise she works for civil service and all grade salary’s are public knowledge

YourAzureEagle · 14/01/2025 22:38

Redvelvetdreams1 · 14/01/2025 19:03

I'm on 29.5k which is the most I've ever earned in my life, and I'm 34. I have a degree and a PGCE but here we are.
I'm never going to be a millionaire, but I just don't feel like I'll ever know what it's like to be well off. I live alone too but fortunately only have myself to support.

I'm an EO in the Civil service, which i hate. I'm not trying to be rich, but I'd just love to have a comfortable salary and be able to save comfortably, go on proper holidays and not just a £19.99 ryanair flight (I know I'm lucky to even do that) afford to learn to drive, and just know what it's like to not have to check my bank account daily and count every penny.

However I know this is the reality for most people. Maybe I can go back to teaching and try to make it up to SLT, but school behaviour is horrendous these days which is why I left.

I'm just feeling a bit lost. I know I'm lucky to even have a job, but without sounding arrogant I considered myself as intelligent, I gained qualifications, can speak other languages and a lot of people my age are earning quite a bit more than me.
Just interested to hear anyone's stories and any advice on where to go from here.

I gave up teaching, moved into school estates management, worked as a caretaker for a bit (which actually paid a smidge more than teaching!), did some more training, elf and safety, fire, asbestos, now run my own little business as a consultant estates manager to schools and earn over £100K

Blarn · 14/01/2025 22:35

I'm an EO but after 3 months in the role I applied for a HEO expression of interest and now have 9 months working at HEO together me into permanent promotions. Definitely worth looking at what your department has. But yes, moving around a lot is still the best way to progress in the Civil Service.

Echobelly · 14/01/2025 22:34

Do you have good business writing skills by any chance (not sure what EO role means)?

I ask because I'm in bid writing and it's a very in demand skill right now, starts at £50k at a big firm and I was offered the job without direct experience because I knew the subject area a bit and could write. If you work for a gov department, that would mean you might have knowledge for bidding for government work. And my pay is rising this month, not because I'm amazing or anything, but they're trying to stop writers being poached by competitors.

Taxbreaks · 14/01/2025 22:34

Best advice I've seen (arrived too late for me) was that if you're irreplaceable, you're unpromotable.
The bosses who gain payrises and bonuses on the back of your hard work will never give you credit.
My break was a somewhat eccentric man who hired three of us, all very similar and usually underappreciated overachievers - none of us have looked back since that point.
My reflections are that I wouldn't ever apply for a job where someone is embarrassed to advertise the salary, always take notice of adverse comments about an employer and counter-offers rarely lead to happy outcomes.

ps Last time I was looking for work, I was very keen on a role paying £60k less than the one I have now - my earnest enthusiasm baffled the jaded interviewers. If you're turned down, doubt them before yourself.

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