At present my DH and I amalgamate all of our finances together. Our relationship is
not in a very good place at present and finances are a major area for disagreement.
I have always been very conservative in my expenditure, don’t spend what I haven’t got, find it easy to prioritise what needs to be spent and don’t have any expensive vices or hobbies.
My DH is happy to spend what he doesn’t have e.g. using overdrafts and credit cards to buy things he wants and refuses to quit smoking and not buy alcohol unless we can afford it. He is aware that he isn’t very good with money and has said that “i
deal with the finances”.
Before we had our LO this was annoying but didn’t have a significant impact. However since having LO and paying over £1k in childcare per month we no longer have the buffer and this is causing resentment as I don’t feel we have an equal share of disposable income.
I would like to separate our finances so we both pay into the joint account to cover joint expenses (mortgage, bills, food, nursery) and then have our own personal
money. However I am concerned that he would go into debt / over his overdraft and not be able to fully contribute to the joint expenses which I can’t cover alone.
he has run up credit card bills which I don’t know how to pay off (we are meeting the minimum payments and a little extra but can’t so a way to clear them with him spending how he is.
I'm not really sure how splitting our finances would resolve things but it feels like it should. AIBU?