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Original poster

To not understand why this happened with my ex

35 replies

Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 13:27

So 6 months ago my ex and I split (my decision) the relationship was going nowhere and I wasn’t physically attracted to him anymore. He told me at the time that he liked this woman from work and I ended up begging for him back!!!! Obviously the relationship didn’t work again and now he is saying he likes her and taking the kids out with her? What the hell is going on here?

OP posts:
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Catza · 14/01/2025 18:28

Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 18:11

He told me did it so that I would beg for him back

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You are clearly still hung up on this relationship which is not particularly healthy. I highly recommend the "conscious uncoupling" book. It will help you work through unresolved feelings

MoonWoman69 · 14/01/2025 18:27

So you didn't want him, yet you begged for him back because he said you would if he started seeing this other woman?!
Seriously, I don't know who is the worse one out of the pair of you! Are you 14 year olds?!
I'm also struggling to see the point of your post to be honest!
You do your thing and let him do his, he's clearly happier with his new woman!

Original poster
Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 18:11

Catza · 14/01/2025 18:03

What? That's your own interpretations surely. He said he liked her, you ended up going back to him for whatever reason and now you are trying to shift responsibility onto him by suggesting he told you that to get you back. Have you considered that he is a human being who has the full right to move on to a new relationship now you rejected him twice?

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He told me did it so that I would beg for him back

OP posts:
Catza · 14/01/2025 18:03

Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 13:30

Yes but how could he tell me that he liked her just so I he could get me back and now it seems they are together?

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What? That's your own interpretations surely. He said he liked her, you ended up going back to him for whatever reason and now you are trying to shift responsibility onto him by suggesting he told you that to get you back. Have you considered that he is a human being who has the full right to move on to a new relationship now you rejected him twice?

Original poster
Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 16:41

AnneLovesGilbert · 14/01/2025 15:02

If you’d met someone knew you wouldn’t feel like this. You’re jealous he’s moved on and isn’t moping around heartbroken and missing you.

It clearly wasn’t a good relationship so try to stop wasting time thinking about them and focus on your own future.

He disrespected me for years. Doing whatever he liked and leaving me to the kids all of the time. I resented him so much and couldn’t show him any affection because of it

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 14/01/2025 15:02

If you’d met someone knew you wouldn’t feel like this. You’re jealous he’s moved on and isn’t moping around heartbroken and missing you.

It clearly wasn’t a good relationship so try to stop wasting time thinking about them and focus on your own future.

Original poster
Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 14:53

LifeExperience · 14/01/2025 14:51

Your ego has been hurt. It will heal.

You don't love him; if you did you would be happy he's found someone.

I needed to hear that. Thank you

OP posts:
LifeExperience · 14/01/2025 14:51

Your ego has been hurt. It will heal.

You don't love him; if you did you would be happy he's found someone.

SheridansPortSalut · 14/01/2025 14:48

Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 14:20

It has been 6 months and I am not ready. I still think about what they are upto etc. it’s making me think I do still love him even though I hated him whilst we were together

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You are coming across as needing a lot of attention.

Let the poor man get on with his life.

Snorlaxo · 14/01/2025 14:47

They are 2 different issues.

He keeps on telling that she’s sexy and great in bed because last time you were jealous and took him back. You’re an ex- of course he wants to wind you up, set up the possibility of sex with you at a later date and get revenge on you for dumping him.

Remind yourself that you don’t want him any more so even if the other woman is Angelina Jolie then it doesn’t matter.

ItGhoul · 14/01/2025 14:46

Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 14:20

It has been 6 months and I am not ready. I still think about what they are upto etc. it’s making me think I do still love him even though I hated him whilst we were together

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You don't love him, you're just jealous and selfish. Get a grip and move on.

ItGhoul · 14/01/2025 14:45

You've posted this before, I think? Pretty much word for word.

Either way - you dumped him, then got jealous because he was with someone else, then you dumped him again. Stop acting like a spoilt baby and let him get on with his life, which he is completely entitled to do. Why on earth shouldn't he move on?

Original poster
Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 14:44

SoScarletItWas · 14/01/2025 14:39

I agree with PP. You ended it, so you feel like he ‘should be’ more hurt.

Then you did the pick me dance when he said he liked someone else. Don’t do it a second time!

Lots of threads on here show that men can’t be alone and get with a new woman very quickly.

Are the kids you refer to hers or yours with him? If yours, that’s the only topic of conversation needed between you. If not, let him get on with it.

Yes. Not much I can do about it now is there. I’m sure I will get over it

OP posts:
B0xes · 14/01/2025 14:44

Arlanymor · 14/01/2025 14:37

(Hope That Helps)

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Thank you!

SoScarletItWas · 14/01/2025 14:39

I agree with PP. You ended it, so you feel like he ‘should be’ more hurt.

Then you did the pick me dance when he said he liked someone else. Don’t do it a second time!

Lots of threads on here show that men can’t be alone and get with a new woman very quickly.

Are the kids you refer to hers or yours with him? If yours, that’s the only topic of conversation needed between you. If not, let him get on with it.

Arlanymor · 14/01/2025 14:37

B0xes · 14/01/2025 14:34

(What does HTH mean?)

(Hope That Helps)

Tohaveandtohold · 14/01/2025 14:37

Have you posted about this before? Because you write like the op of another similar thread

Arlanymor · 14/01/2025 14:36

If you had someone else you wouldn't be giving him a second thought - that's literally what it boils down to, and because you don't have someone else you're having a bit of a 'the grass is greener' syndrome because you've had a break for six months and can't remember exactly how you felt when it was all going wrong. You need to make more of a clean break here - he shouldn't be talking to you about any aspect of his new relationship and if he tries you need to shut that conversation down... if you even need to be talking to him at all at this point in time. You need to find other things to focus on - start of a new year is a great time to start a new hobby - throw yourself into things where you can distract yourself and meet new people... you never know, it might even lead to a new romance if you want one, in time. But for now you need to build strong boundaries and not waste any more time thinking about him.

CleanShirt · 14/01/2025 14:36

Why are you still talking to him if it's upsetting you so much? This all seems very childish.

B0xes · 14/01/2025 14:34

(What does HTH mean?)

ForRealCat · 14/01/2025 14:31

I wonder if you are feeling left behind. You ended the relationship, but he has managed to find someone new and settle into a new routine. It doesn't seem fair. I wonder if you had found someone else if you would be less bothered. You don't want him, but you don't like the fact he is winning.

You've had some harsh replies here.

BodyKeepingScore · 14/01/2025 14:29

Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 13:31

He says think like she is prettier than me and the sex is great 🙄

Why is he discussing his sex life with another woman with you? That's incredibly disrespectful towards both you and her. He sounds like he has no respect for either of you.

OnlyMabelInTheBuilding · 14/01/2025 14:21

Oh well, it’s too late now, you did him a favour.

Original poster
Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 14:20

Fetburzswefg · 14/01/2025 14:08

I don’t know why people feel this way after ending a relationship, but it’s not uncommon. It might be a bit of an ego bruising, that he seemed to be able to move on from you so quickly. Or it might have signalled a finality for you that you weren’t ready to face.

Either way, you need to close the door and move on. Whether he has subsequent relationships is nothing to do with the fact that yours ended for good reasons. He is entitled to move on and find happiness elsewhere, and you should be trying to do the same.

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It has been 6 months and I am not ready. I still think about what they are upto etc. it’s making me think I do still love him even though I hated him whilst we were together

OP posts:
Fetburzswefg · 14/01/2025 14:08

Liveforhappiness · 14/01/2025 13:51

I don’t know. Why couldn’t I bare the thought of him being with somebody else but I didn’t want to be with him?

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I don’t know why people feel this way after ending a relationship, but it’s not uncommon. It might be a bit of an ego bruising, that he seemed to be able to move on from you so quickly. Or it might have signalled a finality for you that you weren’t ready to face.

Either way, you need to close the door and move on. Whether he has subsequent relationships is nothing to do with the fact that yours ended for good reasons. He is entitled to move on and find happiness elsewhere, and you should be trying to do the same.