To have had a bowl of soup?

It’s great that it works,that’s the way it should be.

Sometimes it works then it stops working when the other half grows the entitlement and expectation. Losing the shit,pointing the unfairness and inequality doesn’t work,neither does attempt to discuss it when the other half starts stonewalling you or turns around and walks away.

Resentment grows and grows…

The only option is to walk away and remove yourself and kids from the situation.
Then they start listening (or not). Either way the millstone is gone.

I'm really shocked at the low standards some women have - the whole situation sounds like a joke.

As does mine. Except if my husband wanted to go out for lunch, he’d book somewhere and get out of bed at a reasonable time to get the kids ready.

I prefer our way 😊

.

11am lie in & “you’ve had enough food” would finish me off for the day (or decade, depending what other corkers he had up his sleeve)

Soup= fine.
Husband= knob.
Night owl my arse.

So if you went out for a meal and had a soup starter would you not be allowed a main??

Ah you’ve lost me at the “prefer to do the parenting”. Rod for your own back springs to mind. Sorry it’s just sounds like an utterly dysfunctional relationship. He stays up at night and lies in bed half the day. Monitors your eating and sounds about as much use as a chocolate teapot. And you who never gets a lie on but also choose to not allow him to actively parent because you don’t agree with his parenting style

What exactly is the point of being in a relationship with this man?

Fester ✅
Lazy ✅
Unhygienic ✅

SO close to bingo…

@PureGypsyGold it wasn't 11am. She took him coffee like a good little wifey at 11am. He got up at 12pm.

And the snacks were a throwaway comment that you are weirdly obsessed about.

Why do you keep saying you share lies in. SHE DOESN'T so it's irrelevant what you and your DH do. Mine could lie in until 2pm for all I care. Because he would do the same for me, parents excellently, doesn't comment on what I eat, and is a wonderful DH. OP's isn't and doesn't.

A lie in would be construed as getting up at 11 yes. Most parents take it in turns, when I lie in I lie in until 10/10.30. That's what I need to feel rested after getting up at the crack of dawn all week and my husband gives me that, as do I for him on the other weekend day. So what?

Eating in bed is gross. Can you name a time where it is acceptable to eat food and drop crumbs in the place that you sleep rather than get up and eat in an area where your crumbs won't fester for the next three days while you sleep in them until the sheets are washed? For it to be a sweeping statement there must be lots of times where this behaviour is perfectly acceptable and not lazy and unhygienic that I have glossed over, however I don't believe this to be true.

This man does not sound nice at all, to OP or the children 😭😭

I've had so many conversations with women who 'used to be a night owl' and since children, aren't. Because typically women don't get to entirely check out of parenting for half the day because we stayed up late.

And all the people saying things based on them SHARING lies in with a partner, OP doesn't so it's irrelevant.

FGS why do you put up with this.

Why the f*ck do you put up with this night owl nonsense? I am also a night owl but I have a child now and I have to be up with them because it would be grossly unfair to expect my partner to always do it, just because he is better in the mornings than me. You either need to always both be up or take it in turns. It shouldnt be that he just gets to keep whatever hours he wants and you pick up the slack.

Don't even get me started on the commenting on how much you are allowed to eat nonsense.

OK. My relationship works on communication rather than resentment and game playing so we’ll have to agree to disagree.

Are they his kids?? Why on earth is he getting away with not parenting at a weekend.

A lie-in till 11 when OP’s been up with a toddler since 6? Come on.

If anything is totally Mumsnet, though, it’s sweeping statements like “eating in bed is gross”.

No

The point has not passed me by, I just find it ridiculous and totally Mumsnet for people to be suggesting she retire to bed with snacks (eating in bed is gross) because her husband had a lie in. It's normal for people to lie in on the weekend, me and my husband take it in turns. I certainly don't need to take to bed midday to regain my strength on his day to lie in 🙄

I'm not a middle of the night person or an early morning person, but I'm an adult with a baby and responsibilities, so I get up in the night and in the morning when the baby wakes up (unless it's the weekend and my partners turn to get up with baby) Staying in bed until 1pm is just completely bonkers considering he has a young family!

<the point whooshing past>

@PureGypsyGold's head

Well, your partnership sounds peachy. You enjoy it. I'll be going now.

I say that to my partner all the time, he's a greedy guts.

I would be pissed off if he was eating before I thought we were going out for lunch, its the sort of thing he would do as well

Obviously that doesnt apply to OP but theres nothing wrong in a partner saying that to another

He reminds me to be careful about my food as well as Ive lost a lot of weight and I want it to stay that way, its supportive for me.