To feel so fed up that the only way to get a good education seems to be privately?

Problems became apparent while DS was there. One of the reasons he chose state sixth form college. Turned out to be a good decision when the previously described events occurred relating to his peers who stayed in the private school. Similar stories in other local private schools heard from others I know with DC there. I know a lot of people who sent DC to private schools.

Both DC tell me it was a relief to leave the private schools and get away from the drug cultures there.

Them's the bald empirical facts. No opinions expressed by me. Make what you will of them. I have no axe to grind.

There was/is drug taking at DS's state grammar. DS was very surprised that people actually did it. Thankfully I raised DS correctly and he's never touched the stuff

@OnGoldenPond

I'm sure you will also recognise that state schools are not all raging coke dens either?
Did I say they were raging coke dens?

Both my DC attended private schools and didn't end up with drug habits. But a good number of their privately educated peers did run into problems caused by drug use. Very few of their state school peers did.

Why did you send your children to private school if the school had such a bad drug problem and the state school didn’t? You say your children didn’t end up with drug habits but they easily could’ve done if, as you say, drugs were so easily available.
Did you raise the widespread drug problem with the school authorities?

Well we're managing to agree on something at last. I'm sure you will also recognise that state schools are not all raging coke dens either?

You also seem to have got hold of the idea that I have something against private schools? You are very wide of the mark. I am not pro or anti either sector. I am pro good schools, which can be found in both sectors. Just trying to introduce some grasp on reality as the private sector is not all sunlit meadows. It has its own problems, with drug use being an issue which has been coming up more and more in the private schools in my area. Can't comment on your area, as I have no idea where you are! Pretending private schools are all mini paradises helps no one.

That assumes your kids are in top sets, though. Mine are not yet in secondary, so no idea where they will be placed in sets, but regardless of their ability I want them to be able to reach their potential in a calm and safe learning environment.

Your insistence that there's no drug taking at private schools is pretty naive.

@OnGoldenPond nowhere did I say there was no drug taking at private schools.

Not all schools stream. My children’s does not. Avoids sink sets - which is what happens to all those kids your kids don’t see in their top sets. They disrupt each other and nothing gets done. In non streamed schools the bright and able are mixed up with everyone else so everyone has the opportunity to learn. Disrupters are sent out. My kids would be top set across the board but I love that their school prioritises the whole and not the few. Plus they learn vital life (non academic) lessons on the way: how to concentrate when people are distracting you, tolerance, patience, team work. And that everyone has something to contribute.

@BeyondMyWits why do you think the private school children are better educated vs educated in a nicer setting? the grades at many state schools are superior.
i'm a firm believer in calm and kind regardless of the grades both the draconian rules school type and pushy academic (to the point of mh issues) are not settings i consider appropriate for a child.

I was at INDY in the 80's and I am still waiting for these useful connections that will set me up for life to kick in.
DD left hers at 16 and DS is still there so maybe they will get some at some point instead

Experiences of both state and private. Teaching is the same at both. Bullying and overall disruption is huge in state, none existent in private. Private schooling is worth every penny. My god how I wish state schools would make an effort to clamp down on the chaos so we could send our child there. Ain’t happening any time soon here alas.

Also, by the time kids start studying for their GCSEs, they're streamed anyway, so most of the disruptive kids are filtered out.

I went to a pretty mixed comp. We did have disruptive kids to contend with in yrs 7 and 8, but they spent half their time being sent to the Head of Year, excluded from lessons etc. From yr9 onwards, we were streamed and I was barely conscious of these children and never really came into contact with them except for at registration. I don't know what it would have been like for the kids in their class, or how much time the disruptive ones actually spent in class in between bunking off and bring excluded. You might not be able to afford private school, but there's always tuition to plug the gaps as and when they occur.

@Barbadossunset not sure what your beef is with me, are my experiences triggering you in some way.? Nowhere did I say that all private school pupils emerge with drug problems, though it is remarkably easy for them to get those drugs if they want. It's a problem of having access to a lot of cash with which to get into trouble.

Both my DC attended private schools and didn't end up with drug habits. But a good number of their privately educated peers did run into problems caused by drug use. Very few of their state school peers did. That's just our experience. Your insistence that there's no drug taking at private schools is pretty naive and I'm mystified about why you are so invested in shooting me down.

exactly this. The problem is the perceived classroom disruption by a few who manage to ruin school for many and i suspect the disruptions are not present in all schools.

No independent school is preventing any state school child getting good GCSE results. No child at any state school was denied a 7-9 because of the existence of independent schools.

Sorry to burst your bubble, being kept away from the nasty proles isn't going to protect your DC from that. Especially the drugs.

@OnGoldenPond amazingly both my dc went to private schools and emerged without having taken drugs or threatening anyone with a knife. I realise hearing about good outcomes from private schools isn’t what you hoped for - but that was our experience.

You live in a nice area and clearly charge about your child having a good education and want the best for them. What is most unfair is children living in poverty, children born to addicts, children who have disabilities and not being supported correctly, children who do not have access to healthy food, girls not allowed an education, children being bombed in war torn countries. Pretty sure they have the unfair treatment in life…….

The NE is a large area. Our area is dominantly white British as you can see from my stat of 98%. Ex-mining village catchments tend to be that demographic however I know the further West you go in the NE then the greater the % of ethnic diversity.
Unfortunately NE and Midlands yet again were overall at bottom of table for GCSE results in 23/24.

state curriculum is the big equalizer.
quaint, small, large, or modern buildings is all esthetics.
the problem is the amount of perceived disruption in classrooms.
private schools can not only choose what students to accept but can expel students. state schools can't do so as easily.
state, grammar, private the problem is all the same how to help children for whom traditional schools are unsuitable. not whether there is a pool on site.

I see you are in the NE @twsityizzy I teach in a NE state school which is very diverse both socioeconomically and in terms of faith, ethnicity etc. it's a wonderful comprehensive community.

But I was really referring to the 93% as a whole which will
Be far more diverse as a group than the 7%

The private percentage also varies a great deal round the country. It's double that in parts of London and at sixth form.

Because they are officially classed as independent (shortened to indy for typing sake). They aren't officially classed as public or private
And bore off with the passive aggressive 'connections" remark. Very few parents choose it for this, in fact not sure what connections DDs NE indy would have. Unless you play rugby or cricket

What is this push lately to describe public and private schools as "indy" as if giving it a pretty, little, slightly edgy name will gloss over the paying for your child to be better connected educated than the 93%.

Oh like my local state schools with 98% white British pupils you mean?
Not every area is multi cultural etc

@twistyizzy well I'd argue that as privately educated kids make up 7% of the population and state educated the remaining 93%, the latter are likely to be a more heterogeneous group, no?

So if I say that all state kids look the same, sound the same, have the same politics as their parents, it’s just so dull, is that acceptable?
You've definitely showed your inverse snobbery and prejudice with that comment!