To feel so fed up that the only way to get a good education seems to be privately?

I’m afraid that’s an urban myth. I trained to be a teacher 7 years ago and there were cover teachers who were not qualified teachers. Some were good and some were at best mediocre. But then that applied to qualified teachers as well. I observed many lessons. If I’d have continued teaching I would have been qualified and mediocre.

How can you ensure that though?

Exactly. Why it's important to be in a setting where the peers are nice kids.

And I don’t mean in terms of grades… I think bright, motivated kids will generally achieve good grades wherever they do

^

Not true.

I was mega bright... Very distracted at my rough comp with kids who weren interested, disruptive, disengaged, fighting, swearing etc

I think a lot of comments on here are from people who didn't attend state school, or if they did, they were the better schools

Drug culture? My older DS is Asd and in state secondary and he was offered cigarettes in the restroom last week. Kids are regularly fighting in his school, luckily he's big and he's got a TA for him and another student so noone will bother him.

I know LOADS of people who had state educations, went on to excellent universities, and have succeeded in a wide range of areas.

Parental influence and expectation is probably the biggest factor, IMO

^

I also know loads of people who didn't.

Biggest influence at high school are peers.

Or what you feel is ethically indefensible.

IMO a good school means engaged teachers (who are supported by senior leadership) and motivated children. Private school does not necessarily get you either of those.

There are pros to state schools too. To teach at a state school you have to be qualified, you do not at private schools.

My son went private for secondary, they're 31 in his class so no different from state. But..the children are selected on academic performance AND behaviour so it's really a calm environment. His French teacher went from state to private and she told me that it's such a joy to be able to teach because in state there were so many children who misbehaved for a reason or another that she spent half of the time disciplining. So if it's a good state school don't worry about the size of the class.

I think it depends on just how academic your children are. If they are grade 7/8/9, they'll be in the top sets and get those grades no matter what school they go to.

If they are not near the top of their cohort, you might want to consider going private. They will enjoy their classes more, but become exposed to a massive drugs culture.

DS is in State - I genuinely was ready to go private from the beginning as I was also 'trained' to feel it's the best option. But our local state primary is as good as the local private ones, so we're there now. It's also 'lacking' in some facilities, but we fundraise and those who afford to chip in, do.

Life isn't 'fair' ~ I'd recommend if you hate the schools so much, get involved as much as you can with the PTA etc. Donate and volunteer - without a doubt our state school is amazing because the parents are as involved as they are, and I think that can be said for a lot of smashing state schools. I honestly have about a thousand reasons why I don't have time to, but I make the time because I don't feel comfortable leaving DSs education entirely to the state.

Our children will be going to a private school, as we are fortunate enough to afford it, but also, it does open the doors to alternatives state schools can't. I went to a state school and have done well. It just depends on your opinion and what you feel will be most beneficial. We prefer the smaller classes private offers and the wider range of subjects

It shouldn’t, but it does depend on your area sometimes. We’re in a nice area and our local state schools are lovely. My dd is in reception and we can’t fault her school, the teachers are great, there’s TAs for her class, small group learning sessions within each school day, good resources and activities and plenty of books that get sent home each week. I have friends who live in a different area and their experience of state primary is completely different.

And I don’t mean in terms of grades… I think bright, motivated kids will generally achieve good grades wherever they do. I mean in terms of the day to day experience of being in school. Constant low level disruption and general poor behaviour.

I agree, and you only have to read the Education board on here to see what state a lot of state secondary schools are in.

My three children went to state primaries and comprehensives (all in very mixed areas). All got lots of top A Levels and got into Oxbridge. Sorry if that sounds like boasting but I think you’re being unnecessarily pessimistic.

Infant class size max is 30, with very few exceptions eg: twins.

My dc are in Y8 and Y11, and our experience of state ed over the last 12 years has been excellent. My Y11's 6th form options are all very good too. We have a first/middle(y6-8)/high school system though; I don't know if that has any impact on the quality of our school experience, but I love it.

Not my experience. Very happy with the schools in my area - no need to consider private here, certainly for primary at least.

I second this. My kids are in a class of 20 with only 6 girls. I feel for my daughter lacking for choice in female friendships.

Adding to this - the biggest predictor of success, at least at primary, is parental influence. Your DC has parents who care and are invested in education. That gives them a massive leg up compared to others.

I have three children all state educated and all at or about to go to Russell Group universities.

Their school had issues with heating, they never had lockers and rhey crowd funded for white boards.

Excellent teaching is all that matters.

This is just not true
And I've had kids in private and state over the years

Another one who won’t use private school (we can afford it). You are being unreasonable to focus on building aesthetics and class size (it’s always been 30). If behaviour, upper management and teaching are good then class size is not an issue, as isn’t ‘scruffy’ buildings.

Who are the ‘others’? The 5-7% of school aged kids? They won’t affect your children’s opportunities if they are behaved, hard working and bright.