One child has inherited AGAIN

It isn’t hers to redistribute. What does ‘deserving’ have to do with anything? He doesn’t need to deserve it to have it, and him having it doesn’t mean that OP is required to compensate his brother, who hasn’t even been treated unfairly. The brothers have been treated differently by relatives they don’t have in common, which is entirely different proposition to their own mother treating them unequally.

Rather than a lesson in fairness, such action is more likely to create bad feeling and destroy relationships.

Omg have you no feelings for this woman at all it's not the DC fault either , I myself had one son when I met my husband and then had another son after we were married, then my hubby went on to adopt my first son and our will is made out to them both receiving equal also the same with my mil as she has left equal amounts between her 4 grandchildren with two of them being my son's and the other two children being his brothers children.
This to me shows that I married into a loving family who treated a child that wasn't blood related to them but was still in their hearts part of the family and was loved just much as my other son was loved .

It isn’t hers to redistribute. What does ‘deserving’ have to do with anything? He doesn’t need to deserve it to have it, and him having it doesn’t mean that OP is required to compensate his brother, who hasn’t even been treated unfairly. The brothers have been treated differently by relatives they don’t have in common, which is entirely different proposition to their own mother treating them unequally.

Rather than a lesson in fairness, such action is more likely to create bad feeling and destroy relationships.

It's a sorry state of affairs that it's happened. If the money is accessible can you try redistributing it? E.g. youngest has less/nothing spent on them, they have to self fund everything? Might seem unfair but what has one of your children done to deserve the money that the other hasn't? It'd be a lesson in fairness (and economy)

I do think we open ourselves up to this when we get into blended families. I think we have to understand that the children may not receive equal amounts when it comes to inheritance. 2 families can be on quite different financial spectrums. Grandparents usually consider their biological grandchildren. I don't think they are wrong to do that. An ex partner will consider their biological children and not the children that his ex goes on to have children with.

All of these things and more create this inequality

Why? Out of curiosity.

should ‘step’ grandchildren inherit from potentially four sets of grandparents? What about people who have three or four marriages?

Obviously, their money so their decision.

I have to say however that I am very sad for "stepgrandchildren" who are treated as "less than" than biological grandchildren.

Obviously, their money so their decision.

I have to say however that I am very sad for "stepgrandchildren" who are treated as "less than" than biological grandchildren.

Technically calling her partner's mum "MIL" isn't correct either. This thread is basically "My boyfriend's mum gave his inheritance to his son because of me and now his uncle has done the same thing. I'm devastated that my other son from a previous relationship doesn't have exactly the same amount of money in the bank. Should I interfere again and cause more trouble?"

Apart from the males only bit there is nothing surprising here.

OP I understand why you feel so bad for your older son. I would feel like that if I remarried and had another child and my firstborn was left out especially if we’d been married for a long time and my child had grown up as part of the family for a long time. You’re concerned that they’d feel cast aside and could form resentment if their younger sibling could have advantages they’re denied such as paying off university fees or having a deposit for a home. I can understand your partner’s family making their decisions - I personally think it’s a bit cruel if your son had grown up in the family for a long time. I do think your partner is being insensitive though - he met and married you and did so knowing and choosing to be a stepfather. He and you went on and had a child together but blended families should work that all kids are seen as collectively ‘yours’. I can see it might be different if you get together when you’re much older and all the kids are already adults but this isn’t the case in your situation if I’ve understood correctly. As others have said I think the best thing would be to sit both brothers down and explain that you love them both equally and that you both just want to give them an equal opportunity in life and therefore you want to balance the scales and give assistance in the form of money to the oldest so they can have the same opportunities that the youngest has due to his two inheritances. Being open and allowing them to get the opportunity to ask questions and state their feelings means they won’t get a shock in future when the will’s being read and allows them to know why you’re making the decisions and hopefully will stop any future animosity between them. Talk frankly to your partner he has to be honest just like if you adopt a child they are yours regardless of biology does he see your older child as ‘his’? Hope you find a resolution that makes both your sons feel seen and loved equally. Good luck.

My DH's half brothers (DH was 2 when DMIL remarried - he's 40 now, BILs are 36 and 32) inherited almost £500k each last year from their paternal grandparent and DH got £10k.

It is was it is but won't lie that my DH has felt jealous and has distanced himself from his brothers to help manage those feelings.

I am genuinely not arguing that he should have inherited from his stepfamily.

I came on here because I am upset that my children will have such different lives, which of course many full siblings do, like my own but this disparity has not come about through different choices.

This latest inheritance, I could not have predicted in a million years