Started TTC at 42yr old

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 2025-01-09T17:13:31+00:00

TTC at 42 yrs old only positive stories please 😊

CointreauQuaint · 27/05/2025 14:54

How did you get on @Thatpitchylilacpeer ?

justthatreallyagain · 12/01/2025 11:15

My friends stepmum accidentally fell pregnant and has a healthy baby boy at 52. Same with landlord at 49. Worth giving it a go if that’s what you want.

Original poster

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 11:07

Monr0e · 12/01/2025 10:58

OP, definitely follow all the food advice you have been given already, especially the ovulation sticks.

I wouldn't even count the past month as actively trying seeing as you only did twice and probably got the dates of ovulation wrong judging by your period coming sooner than expected.

As a midwife, the oldest woman in my care who conceived naturally was 47. She had gone to the gp thinking she was menopausal and got a positive pregnancy result instead.

Good luck

Can I please ask you as a midwife do you see lots of women aged 42ish having babies? I understood about the not counting this month as well. We timed it to symptoms EWCM but as my period has arrived possibly 3 days earlier I'm not sure

OP posts:

Monr0e · 12/01/2025 10:59

That should say follow the good advice, not food 🙄

Monr0e · 12/01/2025 10:58

OP, definitely follow all the food advice you have been given already, especially the ovulation sticks.

I wouldn't even count the past month as actively trying seeing as you only did twice and probably got the dates of ovulation wrong judging by your period coming sooner than expected.

As a midwife, the oldest woman in my care who conceived naturally was 47. She had gone to the gp thinking she was menopausal and got a positive pregnancy result instead.

Good luck

Original poster

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 10:51

adviceneeded1990 · 12/01/2025 10:41

Not me personally but maternal Gran had her last at 40, paternal Gran was 44, cousin was 41 and several friends 39-44. Definitely possible, was very common back in the day!

Thank you 😊

OP posts:

adviceneeded1990 · 12/01/2025 10:41

Not me personally but maternal Gran had her last at 40, paternal Gran was 44, cousin was 41 and several friends 39-44. Definitely possible, was very common back in the day!

Original poster

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 10:39

cantpullthetrigger · 12/01/2025 10:28

If you're serious you need to really educate yourself asap and treat this seriously, pulling out all the stops.

It's not just about the chance of sperm meeting egg, there's egg and sperm quality to contend with, as well as increasing the likelihood of implantation and a successful pregnancy thereafter.

Your odds are small, despite the wonderful anecdotes you will hear of successes (mine included at 41). It helps to be realistic.

I'd be addressing asap:

ovulation planning
supplements for you and your partner
environmental factors and toxins
mindfulness and mediation
progesterone ready immediately if you get a positive test
whatever counselling you think you need for your anxiety. It could be a rocky ride at this age as the chances of miscarriage are significantly higher too.

It starts with the egg by Rebecca Fett is a good place to begin your reading.

Thank you. I started taking folic acid 3 months ago and vitamin d roughly 3-4 weeks ago. My partner doesn't take anything. I've ordered ovulation strips (the ones with the smiley face) and have started eating better and trying to manage my stress as best I can. I'm waiting for a response from a potential counselor. I meditate and also like walking and some running (only 1-2 mile) I'm discouraged by the stars online but the doctor I spoke to said it's possible even at my age so I have to hold some hope

OP posts:

Original poster

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 10:31

No but various personal circumstances happened and so we couldn't until now. I know it's not hopeless or impossible so we just need to dtd A LOT more

OP posts:

cantpullthetrigger · 12/01/2025 10:28

If you're serious you need to really educate yourself asap and treat this seriously, pulling out all the stops.

It's not just about the chance of sperm meeting egg, there's egg and sperm quality to contend with, as well as increasing the likelihood of implantation and a successful pregnancy thereafter.

Your odds are small, despite the wonderful anecdotes you will hear of successes (mine included at 41). It helps to be realistic.

I'd be addressing asap:

ovulation planning
supplements for you and your partner
environmental factors and toxins
mindfulness and mediation
progesterone ready immediately if you get a positive test
whatever counselling you think you need for your anxiety. It could be a rocky ride at this age as the chances of miscarriage are significantly higher too.

It starts with the egg by Rebecca Fett is a good place to begin your reading.

IVFmumoftwo · 12/01/2025 10:12

I would having sex a lot more. You don't really have time. Being honest give it six months and then go to IVF. Did you meet each other late?

Original poster

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 09:46

I'm pretty sure when we did it was during ovulation. I only went by symptoms though EWCM and some mild pains/ bloating afterwards. But I guess I can't be sure. Do people ovulate earlier/ later than their symptoms?

OP posts:

Original poster

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 09:43

AmberZebra · 12/01/2025 09:38

Conceiving takes time - it took me 5 years when I was in my 20s with no fertility issues.
Lots of sex and you will get there, as long as you haven’t entered menopause you will get pregnant.

Thank you 😊 periods once a month and regular so I should be more positive. Although it's come Early this month which is odd for me. Maybe stress related. Still day 22 so in the "normal" range by the NHS

OP posts:

Blondeshavemorefun · 12/01/2025 09:40

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 09:17

We haven't. I went to a see a doctor regarding the anxiety I have. She said we need to try every 2-3 days through the month for 6 months. If nothing happened then we need to go back and they will run some tests on us both. Partner is 46

Show quote history

So why didn’t you listen to the doctor then ?

you had sex twice

she advised 10/15 times a month

if you are serious about getting preg you need to know when ovulate so use sticks /machine

Original poster

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 09:40

It's also not helped that my AF arrived earlier than it ever does possibly due to stress of trying maybe. Has anyone known that to happen before?

OP posts:

AmberZebra · 12/01/2025 09:38

Conceiving takes time - it took me 5 years when I was in my 20s with no fertility issues.
Lots of sex and you will get there, as long as you haven’t entered menopause you will get pregnant.

Original poster

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 09:34

NorthernGirl1981 · 12/01/2025 09:30

If it helps OP, I was 32-33 when trying to conceive my second baby and it still took 11 months to conceive!

For the first ten months I was having sex every day during my fertile window, and every other day on the days before and after my window, and I still didn’t conceive. I also thought something was wrong.

On month 11, my husband was away for work and we only got a chance to have sex once during my fertile window (and no sex before the window) and as luck would have it, that’s the month I got pregnant.

Feeling anxious about not conceiving straight away is perfectly normal, especially if you have the added factors of yours and your partner’s age, but don’t lose hope after just one month. Just keep plugging away at it and if it’s not happened after 6 months at least you know you’ve been given the go ahead to seek medical support.

Thank you 🤗

OP posts:

Original poster

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 09:31

I understand what you're saying. I've had a wobble today. I don't think my previous anxiety and. Irrational thoughts are helping. I have booked to see a counselor and I'm hoping they can help me going forward with the stress side of thing's. I do get it was unlikely the happen just like that

OP posts:

NorthernGirl1981 · 12/01/2025 09:30

If it helps OP, I was 32-33 when trying to conceive my second baby and it still took 11 months to conceive!

For the first ten months I was having sex every day during my fertile window, and every other day on the days before and after my window, and I still didn’t conceive. I also thought something was wrong.

On month 11, my husband was away for work and we only got a chance to have sex once during my fertile window (and no sex before the window) and as luck would have it, that’s the month I got pregnant.

Feeling anxious about not conceiving straight away is perfectly normal, especially if you have the added factors of yours and your partner’s age, but don’t lose hope after just one month. Just keep plugging away at it and if it’s not happened after 6 months at least you know you’ve been given the go ahead to seek medical support.

Lynsey5 · 12/01/2025 09:30

When i was 36 i mentioned GP we were TTC and the GP told me we should we should check me and husband now as after 35 women fertility declines. Right enough my husband's sperm count results came back low and we had to go to IVF route. At 42 they should not wait at all. I had a baby at 43 again as result of IVF. I had multiple miscarriages beforehand. You should install one of those fertility apps on your phone and TTC every 2 days during peak fertility. I recommend P Tracker app. I hope it all works out for you.

BeardieWeirdie · 12/01/2025 09:25

It took me years both times in my twenties and early thirties. I know you want positive but you need reality - sex two times in the month is not trying. Unless you’re one of those incredibly fortunate, fertile women, you need to be doing it a hell of a lot more, whether you fancy it or not, to make a baby in your forties.

Original poster

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 09:25

I'll have a look at that book 😊

OP posts:

Katemax82 · 12/01/2025 09:24

Thatpitchylilacpeer · 12/01/2025 09:20

Thank you 🙂 do you mind me asking if it took you all a few months?

Show quote history

I came off the pill at Christmas last year, fell pregnant in June. I wasn't trying, just tracking my ovulation and using condoms during the high chance of getting pregnant bit...I must have got it wrong

CarterBeatsTheDevil · 12/01/2025 09:22

I do think you need to be scientific about it though. If you're not going to have sex every other day from the end of your last period to the beginning of the next (and I have never had that level of energy!) then you need to use ovulation sticks to know exactly what's going on. I recommend The Fertility Bible, a book so powerful that I conceived literally the week after it landed on the mat 🥰

ThatCleverFawn · 12/01/2025 09:22

My conceived at 42 baby is toddling around watching Mr Tumble on CBeebies.

Good luck