Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think the song 'Wind Beneath My Wings' is a narcissist's playbook?

42 replies

LadyMargaretPoledancer · 09/01/2025 15:21

Was listening to the song whilst moving house and was thinking, wow thats a whole lot of narcissism right there.

Did anyone ask the other person whether they were happy to walk behind and not have sunlight on their face? did anyone inquire as to what their pain might be!

You decide:

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
It must have been cold there in my shadow
To never have sunlight on your face
You were content to let me shine, that's your way
You always walked a step behind
So I was the one with all the glory
While you were the one with all the strength
A beautiful face without a name for so long
A beautiful smile to hide the pain
Did you ever know that you're my hero
And everything I would like to be?
I can fly higher than an eagle
For you are the wind beneath my wings
It might have appeared to go unnoticed
But I've got it all here in my heart
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it
I would be nothing without you
Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I wish I could be
I could fly higher than an eagle
For you are the wind beneath my wings
Did I ever tell you you're my hero?
You're everything, everything I wish I could be
Oh, and I, I could fly higher than an eagle
For you are the wind beneath my wings
'Cause you are the wind beneath my wings
Oh, the wind beneath my wings
You, you, you, you are the wind beneath my wings
Fly, fly, fly away, you let me fly so high
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings
Fly, fly, fly high against the sky
So high I almost touch the sky
Thank you, thank you
Thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Sceptical123 · 09/01/2025 21:04

It’s a bit repetitive

MelainesLaugh · 09/01/2025 19:41

As someone who was married to a narcissist, no it’s definitely not

Original poster
LadyMargaretPoledancer · 09/01/2025 19:14

minipie · 09/01/2025 18:56

I love MN, only here could a discussion of a fairly cheesy song encompass narcissism and aerodynamics.

😂😂

OP posts:
minipie · 09/01/2025 18:56

I love MN, only here could a discussion of a fairly cheesy song encompass narcissism and aerodynamics.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 09/01/2025 18:38

turul · 09/01/2025 15:26

One gets lift from the air going over a wing.

Only if you stick to Bernoulli's principle, but as we're talking about a cheesy, emotional song, I'd say, like the song, it's not that deep.

Jennyathemall · 09/01/2025 18:24

turul · 09/01/2025 17:34

To keep it simple: In level flight the air accelerates over the wing to give the lower pressure and lift.

How does a plane fly inverted in level flight then?

Dontlletmedownbruce · 09/01/2025 17:37

I don't think its narcissistic at all. Anyone who is hugely successful is only that way because of a support system that props them up. And many famous people particularly in the arts have difficulties in their personal lives. It's a love song to her supporter, acknowledging how hard it was to be there all the time and how crucial it was for her own success. She couldn't fly without the wind.

Original poster
LadyMargaretPoledancer · 09/01/2025 17:35

Sherararara · 09/01/2025 17:28

To a degree, but it’s mostly the angle of attack of wing into the oncoming airflow that “pushes” the wing up.

Show quote history

Good old Bernoulli

Just think, if he hadn't of been born we wouldn't get to go jetting off on our holidays 😂😂

OP posts:
turul · 09/01/2025 17:34

To keep it simple: In level flight the air accelerates over the wing to give the lower pressure and lift.

Sherararara · 09/01/2025 17:28

turul · 09/01/2025 15:26

One gets lift from the air going over a wing.

To a degree, but it’s mostly the angle of attack of wing into the oncoming airflow that “pushes” the wing up.

MyDeepZebra · 09/01/2025 17:21

MY narc genuinely thought SHE was the other party in the song...the one in the shadow,
unnoticed, who nothing was ever about...but that she'd been our hero all along, the one that keeps us all going.

Spectacular lack of insight.

Ineedtogetoutmorereally · 09/01/2025 17:17

@LadyMargaretPoledancer you really have never met someone suffering from NPD as opposed to a bit of an egotist!

No it's absolutely not narcissistic because I narcisst would never EVER think a subservient partner was their hero or say something like

It might have appeared to go unnoticed
But I've got it all here in my heart
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it
I would be nothing without you

or
You're everything I wish I could be

Narcissists have grandiose ideation and would never for a minute think anyone contributed to their success. They are god like perfection and the rest of us are to worship them.

It's just a typical egotistical inadequate businessman with a stay -at - home wife feeling a bit guilty how she propped up his mediocre career in the bank.

MyDeepZebra · 09/01/2025 16:54

LadyMargaretPoledancer · 09/01/2025 16:46

Wow!

Did you do your best to sing it as ironically as possible??

Show quote history

I was too young (Year 6ish) to appreciate the irony unfortunately! I was just shit scared to be honest and thankful to get through it.

Years later I saw the show Evita when they bring out a little girl to sing a song to Eva about how Evita is basically a saint and the most special person in the world and thought...wow, this feels familiar!

"You're everything I wish I could be..."

CurlewKate · 09/01/2025 16:52

I sat listening to DS singing this as a solo once, and the meaning really hit me. I agree, it's awful!

Original poster
LadyMargaretPoledancer · 09/01/2025 16:46

MyDeepZebra · 09/01/2025 16:42

This has made me laugh.

A relative the entire family (including her own children) have since gone no contact with, made a huge point of excluding me (and only me) from a family event when I was a child because, "it was HER event and what she WANTS, she GETS and she doesn't owe ANYONE an explanation".

She did however invite me to briefly attend and then be escorted out immediately in order to lovingly sing her a song which she lapped up and cried enormous crocodile tears throughout.

Yep.

THIS song.

Wow!

Did you do your best to sing it as ironically as possible??

OP posts:
Donttellempike · 09/01/2025 16:43

LadyMargaretPoledancer · 09/01/2025 15:21

Was listening to the song whilst moving house and was thinking, wow thats a whole lot of narcissism right there.

Did anyone ask the other person whether they were happy to walk behind and not have sunlight on their face? did anyone inquire as to what their pain might be!

You decide:

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
It must have been cold there in my shadow
To never have sunlight on your face
You were content to let me shine, that's your way
You always walked a step behind
So I was the one with all the glory
While you were the one with all the strength
A beautiful face without a name for so long
A beautiful smile to hide the pain
Did you ever know that you're my hero
And everything I would like to be?
I can fly higher than an eagle
For you are the wind beneath my wings
It might have appeared to go unnoticed
But I've got it all here in my heart
I want you to know I know the truth, of course I know it
I would be nothing without you
Did you ever know that you're my hero?
You're everything I wish I could be
I could fly higher than an eagle
For you are the wind beneath my wings
Did I ever tell you you're my hero?
You're everything, everything I wish I could be
Oh, and I, I could fly higher than an eagle
For you are the wind beneath my wings
'Cause you are the wind beneath my wings
Oh, the wind beneath my wings
You, you, you, you are the wind beneath my wings
Fly, fly, fly away, you let me fly so high
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings
Oh, you, you, you, the wind beneath my wings
Fly, fly, fly high against the sky
So high I almost touch the sky
Thank you, thank you
Thank God for you, the wind beneath my wings

No. A narcissist never gives anyone credit for anything

NameChangedOfc · 09/01/2025 16:42

Planesmistakenforstars · 09/01/2025 15:29

Do narcissists have enough empathy to be worried about someone else not having sun on their face? I'm also not sure they would have the self reflection to write a lot of it, or the humility to credit someone else with some of the things in the lyrics.

Agree

MyDeepZebra · 09/01/2025 16:42

This has made me laugh.

A relative the entire family (including her own children) have since gone no contact with, made a huge point of excluding me (and only me) from a family event when I was a child because, "it was HER event and what she WANTS, she GETS and she doesn't owe ANYONE an explanation".

She did however invite me to briefly attend and then be escorted out immediately in order to lovingly sing her a song which she lapped up and cried enormous crocodile tears throughout.

Yep.

THIS song.

Original poster
LadyMargaretPoledancer · 09/01/2025 16:41

Also, thinking about it, in the Beaches film didn't Barbara Hershy shag the man that Bette Midler was in love with??

It just doesn't really fit the film from any angle.

OP posts:
LadyMargaretPoledancer · 09/01/2025 16:36

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SleepingisanArt · 09/01/2025 16:33

Hmm, I never saw it like you have portrayed it. I've spent a lot of my life being the 'behind every good man there has to be a good woman'. My husband has always been the driven business focused one and whilst I have had my own career I chose to make sure he had everything he needed to succeed. He has often said thank you, often encouraged me to put myself first (which I found impossible once I became a mother) and I think we are (still) a great team. I don't understand why me choosing to be supportive makes me a doormat or him a selfish narcissistic.....

Michellesbackbrace · 09/01/2025 16:32

minipie · 09/01/2025 15:23

Yep

And in the film Beaches it’s used perfectly as the Bette Midler character is very much a narcissist.

This.

She is much preferable to Barbara Hershey’s mealy-mouthed character though I must say!

But yes the song is about a massive narc and her wimpy friend 😂

Sux2buthen · 09/01/2025 16:31

LittleSF · 09/01/2025 15:24

I remember years back talking about this song with a work colleague and me going on a mini-rant about how narcissistic and terrible it was. To which she replied "well it was nice when I sang it at my Nan's funeral".

(20 something year old me was a bit of an idiot)

Yes my Nan had it for her funeral too. She was a behind the scenes, work hard and support your family to shine type, shitty thread

Devilsmommy · 09/01/2025 16:26

Planesmistakenforstars · 09/01/2025 15:29

Do narcissists have enough empathy to be worried about someone else not having sun on their face? I'm also not sure they would have the self reflection to write a lot of it, or the humility to credit someone else with some of the things in the lyrics.

Very good point 😁

duckduckgooseduckagain · 09/01/2025 16:12

These lines from a Billy Ocean song always annoy me. The girl doesn't want you, she wants the other guy. Get over it. She's probably not dressing to excite you either.

"You run around town like a fool and you think that it's groovy
You're givin' it to some other guy who gives you the eye
You don't give nothin' to me, you painted a smile
You painted a smile and you dress all the while to excite me"