6yo won't sleep and I'm ready to explode

That's really hard. I'm sorry!

Investigate melatonin gummies
Warm Bath/shower
Snuggly blankets/weighted blankets
Warm milk
Don’t allow DC to lie in after 7am (including weekends)
Set bedtime a little bit later
Read a chapter or two of book to DS or Audiobook
Dont engage in conversation after the story “tell me in the morning, it’s not time to chat now”
Of you need to stay with them , take a book of your own and read while they drop off.
Train DC to stay in room , looking at picture books or listening to audiobooks alone (so you can go to bed or have some time for you)
Check that there is nothing giving DC the heebie-jeebies (thus avoiding bedtime)

With my ADHD dc at this age, I allowed them to read books for as long as they liked or lights out, no getting out of bed. He was a prolific reader for a while but, eventually got into habit of just trying to sleep after a chapter of a book

We encourage/allow late nights at weekends but do not allow lie-ins, this seems to help and he is usually ready for sleep early on Sunday evenings.

I think you are right to accept that DC needs less sleep than the average. The average is just that, some need more some need less. Whatever works for your family is best.

I’m an ADHDer in my 40s. I’ve always had trouble sleeping. It’s not exactly that I’m not tired, but my brain isn’t sleepy. If I try to lie still and quiet before my brain is ready, it goes haywire. It can be pretty distressing.

When I talk to neurotypicals about the sleep thing, they generally insist on something like “you mustn’t do anything novel or stimulating at bedtime” - but that’s not good advice for me. I need something stimulating enough that my brain feels like it’s being given the choice to remain engaged if it wants to. Ideally, though, it’ll be something that doesn’t need too much physical engagement from me. Audiobooks are often ideal, though I see that your DS has problems with finding the “right” thing to listen to (I struggle with this sometimes, too.)

Luckily, I was a fast reader, and books have always been my bedtime thing. But another thing I used to do as a child, before I had a cassette player (yeah, I’m old!) available for audiobooks, was to tell myself stories. They were weirdly long and boring stories about mundane things like going to the shops or what I would do at school the next day! But I could lie down and close my eyes while I told these stories, so the barrier to falling asleep was very low. I still do something similar at times - I put on one of those apps that plays ambient noise like sea sounds, or the sound of rain on a roof, and sort of imagine where I am and what I’m doing in the environment conjured up by the sound. Maybe your DS could try telling himself stories at night - either out loud or in his head? And perhaps he would find ambient sounds (rather than white noise) interesting?

Get him a Gro Clock and tell him not to get out of bed until it turns yellow in the morning. Make sure there are repercussions for waking you beforehand, if it's not an emergency. He can stay in bed looking a books or doing something quiet, but not get out.

They all try it on re avoiding bedtime, I think it's something you have to be a bit strict about.

Brown noise? Natural sounds

I have no ADHD experience so apologies if I'm miles off, but could a Yoto player be an option? It's an audiobook player, no screens. Kids can use it themselves. Has a nightlight/geo clock idea built in.

It really settles my kids to lie in the dark and listen to it (though I have never had the problem you are facing).

They sell stories from paw patrol to the chronicles of Narnia and my 6 year old and 7 year old adore it.

The now 6 year old was probably about 4.5 when he really embraced it (having had it for a year at that point and wondering if it was all a waste) but now he speaks like Enid Blyton.

Lots of threads on here about them if needed.

My 7yo is like this. Audio sleep stories help. Sometimes it's 11pm every night though

It's first got to be prescribed by a specialist...then if approved a GP can carry on.

The magnesium is a good idea. I use sweet bee organics magnesium butter on the soles of my son's feet after bathtime and have seen an improvement in his ability to focus at bed time. Also second the weighted blanket. I got him to pick his sonic one out and he was so excited for it to arrive and try it out.

Try some mightykids magnesium liquid, mix with fresh apple juice. It's a little pricey but it's working for us (my child has adhd)

My dc 1 had adhd and never sleeps. We got him a cd player and plenty of books for his room so he could read until he conked out (reading is his hyper focus and helps quieten his mind). He doesn't have to be asleep but he does have to stay in his room (apart from the loo, obvs) and this works well. Could you try something along those lines?

White noise machine and weighted blanket.

Blue light therapy might also help.

Will he stay in bed and listen to stories on audible ? You can put it on a sleep timer for one hour and play it quite quietly . It's helped with my daughter,

If he is on adhd pathway then he may not be a sleeper. Iv two that ok with sleep and one that doesn't and he ended up being prescribed melatonin.
We had to do hideous amount of exercise on an evening - good hour biking, scooting etc to thoroughly exhaust them.

Melatonin especially if on an ADHD pathway.

Failing that- take your foot of the pedal and lower expectations of bed=sleep. Keep the winding down, and after stories etc perhaps suggest that he can read/play quietly- like a puzzle or Lego or something or colouring until he’s ready to sleep? So he can begin to self regulate.

Buy melatonin online or if you have any friends / family visiting America they sell it in the vitamin aisle there.

Yup, she’s never slept. We now let her fall asleep on the sofa while we watch tv or we never have an evening. Not perfect but needs must.

I have heard weighted blankets really help cut down the time spent 'settling'