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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Am I being prudish, or do I have a point?

534 replies

AmIJustAPrude · 08/01/2025 09:39

NC for this.

I've just sent the following email to a company I ordered underwear from:

I've just received my order confirmation and was quite shocked by the accompanying image. I don't want to screenshot it to resend, so hopefully you can work out the image I mean: it is of two women/girls lying on their fronts outside wearing black pants.

The woman (I hope) or girl on the left is very thin, which immediately made me assume she was a teenager. One of her breasts is clearly visible.

I'm not prudish about breasts at all, but it made me extremely uncomfortable to receive an image of what appears to be an almost-naked teenage girl. Given you also sell bras, it seems totally unnecessary for her to be completely topless.

I recommend you review the images you send out to your customers, as this has put me off using your company again.

As I say, I don't have an issue with breasts- I've breastfed in public many a time. It was mainly the fact that, based on her body shape, the woman/girl in the photo looks very young (post-pubescent, but pre-adult) and the exposed breast was completely unnecessary.

So what do you think: did I overreact?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
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AmIJustAPrude · 08/01/2025 10:41

pumpkinpillow · 08/01/2025 10:31

She's not even that thin. She looks like a perfectly healthy woman, likely to be younger (or skin airbrushed!).

I wasn't saying she looked unhealthy, incidentally.

OP posts:
Survivingnotthriving24 · 08/01/2025 10:41

Ah so I was looking at the right photo and I thought her out of focus elbow was a breast too, so yes even more unreasonable than I first thought OP 😂

user3827 · 08/01/2025 10:41

YANBU to raise it - definitely a good thing to keep an eye out for the normalisation of paedo pics, which IS happening.

ChannelFiveDrama · 08/01/2025 10:40

Storm in a b-cup as they say!

AmIJustAPrude · 08/01/2025 10:40

TooManyChristmasCards · 08/01/2025 10:30

a thin woman's body could easily be mistaken for that of a teenager.

wow

Read that again.

I'm sorry if I've offended you.

OP posts:
RegimentalSturgeon · 08/01/2025 10:40

TheWonderhorse · 08/01/2025 10:07

I tried to research the company and the models and now have pants in a basket. Fuck's sake.

Pants in a basket? Very seventies

Startinganew32 · 08/01/2025 10:40

AmIJustAPrude · 08/01/2025 10:37

You're free to think that, but I disagree- if, god forbid, I was ever accused of anything by a pupil, my phone would be searched by police. They are able to access deleted images.

They’d also be able to see the dodgy emails you’d received, including one that features someone’s elbow.

HolyPeaches · 08/01/2025 10:39

AmIJustAPrude · 08/01/2025 10:33

Oh my god, I'm in absolute hysterics! I've just zoomed right in and you are absolutely right, it's her elbow! 😂What an absolute tit, excuse the pun!

To make it worse, I'm a lesbian- you think I'd be able to tell the difference between an elbow and a breast!

I'm so sorry for wasting everyone's time- I now need to send a grovelling apology to the company regarding me email! Any suggestions for how to phrase it?!

This is quite possibly the stupidest thing I have ever done in my life.

To be fair OP, whichever poor customer service agent will be on the receiving end of your email will probably have a good laugh at it. Then they’ll probably show it round the rest of the office for everyone else to be in bemusement of and laugh at too.

Don’t send an apology, just wait for their response.

AmIJustAPrude · 08/01/2025 10:38

FumingTRex · 08/01/2025 10:27

I think they have put the wedding ring on her finger to make clear she is an adult. However YANBU to complain about them using a model that might appear under 18 even if they are not.

In my defence, they'd cropped her hand out of the picture along with her face!

OP posts:
user3827 · 08/01/2025 10:38

Omg if that's a boob.... it's HUGE!!! 😂

TooManyChristmasCards · 08/01/2025 10:38

AmIJustAPrude · 08/01/2025 10:37

You're free to think that, but I disagree- if, god forbid, I was ever accused of anything by a pupil, my phone would be searched by police. They are able to access deleted images.

you are a man?

And you are judging women's body because they are not curvy enough for your liking and not "women enough"?
REALLY?!?

MumWifeOther · 08/01/2025 10:38

Oh I’ve just seen the image - I can tell it’s def an elbow and the image itself is so harmless I do think YABU even if it was a full boon on display

AmIJustAPrude · 08/01/2025 10:37

TooManyChristmasCards · 08/01/2025 10:24

just that comment shows you that you are being completely ridiculous, it's beyond being a prude.

You're free to think that, but I disagree- if, god forbid, I was ever accused of anything by a pupil, my phone would be searched by police. They are able to access deleted images.

OP posts:
MumWifeOther · 08/01/2025 10:35

I’ve just had a look at their website and they are refreshingly representative of women of all shapes / sizes / ages so I think YABU I’m assuming she’s a teenager just because she’s thin. The fact that you can see her nipple is a little odd; it wouldn’t bother me but if it bothers you YANBU to email the company

SerendipityJane · 08/01/2025 10:35

BabarEnFamille · 08/01/2025 10:33

This is an incredible marketing campaign because I’d never heard of them and now having a browse😆

Someone has earned their bonus ...

LadyChilli · 08/01/2025 10:35

That diagram is wonderful 😂

I'd probably not complain about that but don't think you are being over the top in doing so.

Edit: I just saw your most recent update and now I'm in absolute knots. Thanks for a brilliant laugh

Combattingthemoaners · 08/01/2025 10:35

AmIJustAPrude · 08/01/2025 09:52

This is the weirdest thing I've ever done, but here you go!

She's on her front but propped up, so it's an angled side view, but you can see nipple.

😂 Neil Buchanan would be proud! Just read the update, laughing even more now 😂

TheGhostOfTheYearYetToCome · 08/01/2025 10:34

Now it is definitely an adult and there is definitely no breast can you share the picture that you were sent in the email

(Or is this all a very clever marketing ploy?)

OldieButBaddie · 08/01/2025 10:34

I think that's her other elbow!

(ETA had only read op and seen pic)

TooManyChristmasCards · 08/01/2025 10:34

TaggieO · 08/01/2025 10:32

Just reread your OP. Have you genuinely sent a complaint email about an elbow????? You absolute numpty 😂

Complaining about a boob is brilliant, even better when it's an elbow

but complaining because a perfectly average looking woman is too thin???

I don't even know what to say.

BabarEnFamille · 08/01/2025 10:33

This is an incredible marketing campaign because I’d never heard of them and now having a browse😆

TaggieO · 08/01/2025 10:33

This reminds me of the thread where the OP was devastated to have found a dead cat and was ringing round vets and things only
to realise it was a teddy…..

AmIJustAPrude · 08/01/2025 10:33

Datesandprunes · 08/01/2025 10:23

Actually, if this is the picture then that's not her boob! It's her elbow. It makes you look twice though.

Sorry if it's not that picture.

Oh my god, I'm in absolute hysterics! I've just zoomed right in and you are absolutely right, it's her elbow! 😂What an absolute tit, excuse the pun!

To make it worse, I'm a lesbian- you think I'd be able to tell the difference between an elbow and a breast!

I'm so sorry for wasting everyone's time- I now need to send a grovelling apology to the company regarding me email! Any suggestions for how to phrase it?!

This is quite possibly the stupidest thing I have ever done in my life.

OP posts:
Only2WeeksToGo · 08/01/2025 10:33

Also delighted I don't have to boycott stripe and stare because I love their bras.

Only2WeeksToGo · 08/01/2025 10:32

Brilliant! I don't think you sound like a prude and it's good that companies get feedback on this kind of thing but that is definitely an elbow. And she's a slim adult. Nothing to see here... you've given me a laugh though and your diagram was 10/10.