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Original poster

Unused embryos - is this a ridiculous thought?

86 replies

Whattodonowandthen · 07/01/2025 12:01

This is probbly going to sound odd, but emotionally, it would bring me the greatest closure.

I've been lucky enough to complete my family, due to the miracle of IVF. I do however have four embryos still at the clinic. Every year, I pay for storage and the reality is I cant bear the thought of them being 'destoyed'.

They legally cannot be donated, nor used for research.

The only way i feel like i could emotionally say goodbye to them would be if I had them transferred back into me, but at a time of my cycle that means they would not result in a pregnancy.

I know that sounds ridiculous, but it would feel like they were at least coming to a natural end in me, not in a petri dish.

Is this even a legal option? Has anyone else considered this? Any words of advice if it's not possible?

OP posts:
Cattenberg · 07/01/2025 12:13

I have heard of this in the US. They call it “compassionate transfer”.

Did you use donor eggs or sperm? If so, and the donor has reached their UK quota of 10 families, it might still be possible to donate your embryos abroad.

dnasurprise · 07/01/2025 12:12

Yes what you describe is a fairly common practice and your fertility clinic will be aware of it.

mynky · 07/01/2025 12:12

You also can't legally donate to another couple if either part of the embryo (egg or sperm) was donated.

MumChp · 07/01/2025 12:12

Sounds like a waste of money tbh.

Original poster
Whattodonowandthen · 07/01/2025 12:11

Without getting into the reasons why, they 100% cannot be donated or used for research. I appreciate this is an option for many people who have IVF, but there is a sizeable group who cannot, legally.

OP posts:
FallenRaingel · 07/01/2025 12:10

@SereneCapybara The OP or her partner (if he would consent) may no longer be in the age parameters to allow for donation. Most common cause for not being able to legally donate.

curlyLJ · 07/01/2025 12:09

We had 6 leftover which were all donated to the clinic for research, so it's absolutely not illegal.

SereneCapybara · 07/01/2025 12:06

Are you sure they can't be donated? I got letters asking whether we wanted to continue to freeze them or whether I would like to donate them to an infertile woman. At the time I was knee deep in tiny children, one with SEN and physical problems, elderly parents etc and hadn't the brain space to make such a huge decision. But I have since wished I had chosen to donate them. This was maybe 18 years ago - perhaps the law has changed since then.

ueberlin2030 · 07/01/2025 12:04

Could they be returned to you and buried somewhere? Sorry if this sounds insensitive, just a thought and I'm not sure it's even possible.

Tinselinthewhoopsiebasket · 07/01/2025 12:03

Pregnancy can result at the most unexpected time in a cycle op. Not worth the risk imo.
My friend donated hers to research no problem.. Yet you say legally you can't?

justteanbiscuits · 07/01/2025 12:02

That is quite common in some cultures