Is anyone up. Completely overwhelmed

I have teen kids. There’s always a way back if they haven’t passed exams. BTECs are a good option. Volunteering for an advice/rights charity (Citizens Advice, Shelter etc) can really help with getting a job. Often leads to paid work if you’re reliable, bright and good with people.

Write a list by your bedside table last thing every night of things on your mind / things you need to do. Could you just succumb to your 4 year old and let her sleep on your bed ?

I'm awake too.

Extending sympathies and solidarity to you as a fellow single parent, it's unbelievably hard when you have no support.

I'm awake worrying about DD too! She's 16 but I'm so worried about her future, school let her down, college appears to be similar and her dad is a dick. No-one else to help her but me and I feel a bit helpless.

Wish I had better words of advice for you but I too am burnt out! X

Most importantly you need to speak to a gp and a referral to for counselling. I’ve had insomnia and it can be so debilitating.

Magnesium supplements seem to have helped me with my sleep. Not cured it but I definitely sleep better when I take them.

Paul McKenna does a sleep hypnosis thing on YouTube. Try listening to that. It doesn’t work for me long term but when I haven’t used it for a while it does.

Another thing that sometimes works is I think about what I would do if I won the lottery. Because I’m focused on one thing it helps my mind to switch off.

Aww, bless you both. If she gets scared in the night I’d let her sleep with you. Might help you both to snuggle up together. Anxiety is the pits.

I find listening to talk radio (BBC 5 Live) helps. It’s like having company and provides a distraction. Sometimes I’ll have it on very low all night. But realise it can be worse for some people.

Agree with PPs that a few drops of lavender oil in a bedtime bath and/or in a diffuser in the room and mug of warm milk before bed might help you both. Maybe also a hot water bottle. Very comforting.

Lone mums are the strongest people. Invincible. When my anxiety’s bad, I think of all the wonderful things I’m blessed with compared to lots of mums in the world: beautiful daughter, your family, not living in a war zone, fresh water, food. Think of all the things you’ve achieved that day/week: you can face anything. And try to imagine you’re in your happy place: on a beach in the sunshine or wherever you feel most relaxed.

It gets easier the older they get. Hang in there.

I’m awake too. My sleep is terrible anyway but since receiving sad news of a friend being terminally ill my sleep is worse than ever. Nothing worse than being up in the night when it feels like the whole world is asleep.

Magnesium also helps, it worked instantly for me when I was working 12 hour shifts and could not get to sleep all night until just before I had to get up for work. Like a miracle, some of my work mates tried it and it worked for them as well, that and vitamin d and b. Magnesium oil or citrate tablets. Good luck.

think i’d could do with one of these!

I'm here... 7month old ans husband snoring in harmony next to me. Add insomnia and chronic back pain to the mx and tadah... here we are.

Get it all out..... you'll feel better... GO

When my son was having nightmares about monsters we used to draw pictures of them together from his descriptions and then scribble them out or rip them up. This really helped him at the time too.

Agree that it can help to break down and list each thing that is worrying you.
Is it money? Do you need advice about debt management/benefits/child maintenance/tax? There are organisations that can help with all of those. Maybe we can suggest some?
About work - is it anything specific, like colleagues/manager/workload/bullying?
Writing it down can help to stop it all going round and round in your head.

My 3 year old has just started having nightmares about monsters too, out of nowhere. We’ve bought a worry monster (£10 from Amazon) and explained to him it’ll eat all his bad dreams. It has a zip on its mouth so for older kids you can write down their dreams / worries and “feed” it to the monster to be gobbled up.

im awake as well - really anxious about a plumbing issue which i have blown up to mean we will need to rip the bathroom out and cost££££s. worries always seem insurmountable at night i really wish i could be one of those “i’ll think about it tomorrow” type of people. i do find some calming music helps (google deep sleep relax music delta waves). my youngest was always one for coming in bed with me - she did it regularly up to about 14, she’s 26 now and sleeps like a log! when i have night like this i always think well i’ll sleep tomorrow night at least (cos i’ll be exhausted). i do sometimes use kirkland sleep aids. you can get them on ebay and they are only antihistamines really but are effective.

Vitamin D supplements are really important in the winter. We don't get anything like enough sunlight this time of year to achieve a normal level of vitamin D. Anxiety is a classic symptom of vitamin D deficiency.

Camomile tea and an audiobook or some very calm music can be a good distraction too. I often drift off with the radio on quietly. It is the silence that is stressful.

Do you think she would sleep in with you? If you can't sleep with her in your bed, could you make her a little nest on the floor beside you? We used to always have a spare duvet, pillows and blanket next to the bed so that any of the DC who felt a bit scared or lonely could just creep in and snuggle down. They soon outgrew it. Everything with little children is a phase and for me, it was more important that everyone got sleep.
Lack of sleep makes everything worse.

Lavender drops on the pillow are very calming and aid sleep.

Old fashioned hot chocolate or Horlicks for both of you. The warm milk will help you sleep.

Can she sleep in with you while she's got night terrors, it will help settle her and take the pressure off.

Try not to worry OP, it will pass xx

the pressure is above my nose but then goes round to the back of my head, I think it could be my sinus as I’ve had a runny nose and I’ve been feeling dizzy, but then I have health anxiety anyway so tell myself it’s something else

Definitely look up acupressure massage for sinus relief. Even if it's not your sinuses I find these very relaxing.

Sorry you are struggling OP. Also a single parent here so I really sympathise. I'm up and happy to chat, I am feeling extremely unwell with a bad chest infection.

When I feel like this I make a to do list and prioritise. I try to break my worries down into little actions. If I can't think of an action I just try and let the worry go into the too hard to deal with pile. It sounds like you need to prioritise your health so getting on the phone to the GP tomorrow sounds like a good plan.

I also practice acupressure for stress relief, easy to look up on YouTube.

My favourite trick is to think this, 'well I want to be asleep, and I wish I was, but at 7am tomorrow I'll wish I could just stay in bed. Not sleep, just be allowed to stay in bed. So I get that right now. I get to be in bed, all tucked in.'

Sometimes it helps. Sometimes here we are at 3am with fully awake insomnia