My aunt and her daughters PIP/ benefits

If your cousin leaves education and works she'll need to pay your aunt digs of more than the £70pm she's currently paying. Your aunt is in a difficult position financially and obviously relies on the DLA.

If she's capable of managing her own money she's capable of paying her own way.

Well we'll just have to agree to differ.

Of course it's not impossible that the aunt is scamming the system but it's incredibly unlikely. The vast majority of parent carers make enormous personal sacrifices to ensure their kids have the support they need.

She won't have got the DLA in the first place without an abundance of evidence and you know that.

Agree with this if cooks own dinner, could baby sit and travel anywhere.

My dd is capable in some respects but could not do the three above.

Similar to my dd. Comes across as capable but actually wastes her money on vapes, weed and roblox type digital games to excess.

Whereas driving lessons in future, therapy, food due to specific issues, gym membership is a better use.

Tŵo nights a fortnight is very different to up.to 8.nights a fortnight.

Not necessarily. Its no indicator of what the aunt may be having to do behind the scenes in terms of care needs/life admin.

Dc is now on high level PIP. A few years ago my ex would have her for every other weekend. He was absolutely uninvolved in terms of support. No attendance at therapies and other weekly medical appointments. Never got called in to school every other day etc.. his view is that she didn't need help. Well all the professionals involved begged to differ.

It's very telling to me that she works part time cash in hand at a job her mum got for her. This is quite typical of people with ASD where the vast majority don't work.

I think the OP is being unfair on her aunt tbh.

I think you need to butt out.
Your cousin is just about to turn 16 if she's just been invited to claim PIP.
That's still very young to manage all your own affairs and people with autism mature later than NT people.
There may well be difficulties and support needed that you don't see.
Autistic people mask.
Is she still at school/college? At 16 she really should be continuing her education or in an apprenticeship, especially if she's as capable as you say.
Is anyone supporting her for her future options?
Your aunt maybe worried about money, that's valid, she must still be mainly supporting her, food, housing, clothing, haircuts, travel, any extra support such as therapists, equipment etc. She may also be practically and emotionally supporting her above and beyond what is typical for most 16 year old.
I wouldn't say anything until she's 18+ I think the majority of 16years who transfer from dla to pip have parents as their appointees.
And there's no guarantee her pip application will be successful.
If you want to help your cousin talk to her about her future options, college, 6th form apprenticeship etc and support her apply for them.

But the Op says the cousin stays over at her house 3/4 nights a so I assume she does have a good idea of cousins needs?

@Whatyearisit20 I'm getting a whiff here of a mum (your aunt) who over-reported symptoms through childhood (paediatricians rely heavily on parental reporting), benefited from the dla that resulted, and is now trying hard to keep that going, while your cousin tries to break free. Does that strike a chord?

Completely agree :) I was referring to OP’s aunt as i’d like to know what she actually spends the money on as it doesn’t sound like it’s benefitting the child as OP states the child doesn’t have very severe needs at all.

This

There may be a lot of care and support that your aunt provides that you aren't aware of because you don't live with them.

Especially if they are neurodiverse. Many neurodiverse kids present much younger than their actual age. Typically 3-4 years behind their peers. So a 16 year old could be more like a 12 year old in terms of maturity.

I would imagine many posters have very little experience of this hence replies may say yanbu.

It's none of your business really and even if you are well meaning I'm not surprised she's annoyed

Absolutely this.

This is what I was trying to get across, OP is making it sound like her aunt is using it for her own personal use and not the child.

This is rubbish, I used my son’s DLA money to support the household while I stopped work to support his needs.

The DWP had no issue with this at all when I asked. If you can afford to put it aside and not touch it except for very narrow areas then great, most cannot though hence the ways it can be used are broad.

PIP is in my sons name but paid to me….i manage this for him simply because he is vulnerable to people who would take advantage of him. Most of it goes on paying a PA for him so I can work part time. Ditto his UC.

I'm not using it for my personal use I'm using it to benefit my son taking him to groups and activities would be of no benefit if he didn't have a roof over his head or not being fed would it i suggest you read it again.

DLA ends at 16 and the 16 year old transitions to PIP.

Read the DLA contract again and you see that the money is to be used for the child. Not your personal use. Carers allowance can be used for you if you have to give up work (like I have).

No you are wrong ,the money is intended to benefit the disabled child ,i would say having a warm home food etc benefits them as I said many parents have to take a huge drop in income due to their child's needs it also benefits my child having me at home to put him on and off school transport and be around to collect him if needed he's at respite tonight but I csn never guarantee that will go smoothly and I won't be asked to collect him parents csn spend the DLA however they want as long as it benefits the child.

What a wasted life. With some help your cousin could live a more fulfilling life which involves working instead of living off benefits and scamming the system working cash in hand.

Where does it say cousin is 16??

I am not scaremongering, in my DLA contract it states they have every right to carry out random checks. If you are spending DLA money on yourself and not the disabled child entitled to it, then you are wrong.

I had a huge drop in income when DS turned 20ys as l lost the TC payment for him and child allowance - about £600/mth but l knew this was coming so l increased my working hours to cover some of the deficit.

DS is currently 21yrs. He does have an EHCP and works part time from home doing admin for the company my sister works at. However that isn't guaranteed.

I do include his PIP money in my bills, plus he pays £150/mth from his wages. l can't afford to stay in our home and house him otherwise. If l downsized it would be possible to afford it but due to my son's ASD he would be very distressed.

He is also an adult now and when l looked at getting him his own place his PIP and wages wouldn't cover living expenses. I do have a plan that he will go into independent living eventually and l am in contact with the adult social care team to put that in place when he feels ready to move out.

It's at that point that l will downsize. My concern though is if he doesn't cope living independently and l have downsized.

I however pay for everything for him - including a new laptop when his broke, days out, clothes...everything.

I do feel guilty but ultimately l need to house my son. He is financially vulnerable as he's given access to his bank account to criminals twice and they have wiped him out. At that point we had a joint account solely for his PIP which they also gained access too. To protect my own bank accounts we don't have a joint account anymore.

This is not true, DLA is intended to benefit the child how the parent uses the DLA is entirely up to them for many families it goes into the family pot and this is a perfectly legitimate use as quite often parents have to give up work or reduce hours to care for their disabled children which benefits the child
Also bills csn be higher food shops etc
I have been receiving DLA for my son for over ten years and not once have Been asked to justify what I spend it on please don't scare monger .

Yes I'm well aware of that i have a 14 year old who is severely autistic and gets the highest rates of DLA and i can't see that changing when he transfers to PIP
I have looked into PIP for my oldest son as he acute necrotizing pancreititis two years ago and has no Been left as an insulin dependent diabetic but according to the criteria he wouldn't be eligible for PIP as he's fully independent in caring for himself and navigating independent travel.
I assume your daughter must need some help as if was fully independent she wouldn't meet the criteria?

The aunt would have to apply to be am appointees and then the cousin would be assessed to see if she has the capacity to manage her own money .