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AIBU?

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Original poster

To front face DS at 15 months in his car seat?

31 replies

monstera16 · 05/01/2025 19:11

My DS, currently 13 months, absolutely hates the car seat and we can't seem to stop the screaming. We have tried everything - toys, videos, some one in the back, mirror, no mirror, happy song, snacks, nap time trips, new car seat.

He will scream and scream and get himself all worked up and will only stop once you have got him out of the car.

I am fully aware of the guidance to rear face as long as possible, but it's got to the stage where we are now distracted driving and potentially risking an accident through not being fully focused on the road.

So my aibu is, am I being unreasonable to try front facing once he hits 15m to see if this helps control the screaming? (He meets the height and weight requirements)

We have the Joie 360 spin if that helps.

OP posts:
WidgetDigit2022 · 05/01/2025 19:20

Have you tried rear facing in the front passenger seat with the airbag off?

Upstartled · 05/01/2025 19:19

I shifted all three of mine to forward facing at this point.

BarbaraHoward · 05/01/2025 19:18

I had one like this, although thankfully she improved when she moved to the 360 from the infant carrier.

This one is for you to judge I'm afraid OP. Personally, I'd try it. The stress of driving with a screaming baby is unreal and not safe either, and the risk of a serious collision is small. But others will say any risk at all of a serious collision is too high. You (and your partner if you have one) need to decide your own attitude to risk on this one.

MissScarletInTheBallroom · 05/01/2025 19:18

Could you try a different car seat? My daughter stopped screaming in the car the moment we upgraded her from the bucket seat.

I wouldn't front face at 15 months, no.

JaniceBattersby · 05/01/2025 19:16

I turned my first and third babies the second they were old enough. Honestly I spent the first year of their lives not being able to go and visit family or do nice things because being in the car seat was so traumatic for them. They’d scream and scream and vomit everywhere for hours. I had to sit in the back and ubuckle my seatbelt while husband drove so I could lean over to to breastfeed while we were driving on the odd occasion when we had to be somewhere. It used to take hours and hours with loads of stops to get anywhere.

Life is a balancing act. I’d certainly turn your baby in these circumstances.

FWIW I’ve covered inquests for my local paper for 20 years and have only ever seen one child who was in a proper car seat killed on the roads in all that time. Car seats are incredibly safe whichever way around they are.

AgeGapBbe · 05/01/2025 19:15

I wouldn’t be risking that yet, there are other things to try first. Have you had decent advice re your car seat fit? There are groups on fb that have got independent sellers who are experts and can help adjust the fit of the seat. Have you tried him in the front next to the driver? That would be much much safer than forward facing- at his age he wouldn’t stand a chance in an accident, do you have to drive him much?